Snobbery to popular names

[Tblock]

Anyone get the feeling of a lot of snobbery when it comes to popular names ? I have seen it on here a lot. “Oh I don’t like Alifie, it’s far to popular and over done “ “ Ava way to popular and over used “ etc etc. Seen it a lot of times when people have wanted an opinion and specifically mention a popular name. I don’t feel anyone should feel like they can’t name a child a name they love, just because it’s a popular name and is a “trend” as such. I know it’s all opinions, but I get the impression people don’t like certain names, purely because they are popular and it’s the in thing to do in bashing popularity. If you want to name you’re child a name that will probably have another 6 of the same in his/her school then so be it. Nobody had an issue when we were in school and everyone was called jack , Sarah, Daniel, Rachel etc, why such snobbery these days ? Just something I have picked up a lot

It’s just my opinion, which is what you asked for. You can think it’s ridiculous if you like. But you wanted to know.

@Nymeriastark1

There's snobbery on every name despite what category it's in. Popular, unique, unusual.. there will always be snobbery and negative opinions on a name. If you like the name use it. Don't worry about what others think of it.

Watch the video of Katie Hopkins on this morning judging kids on their names. That's a fun watch 😂 and I'm sure it was like something like 90% of people disagreed with her.

Yeh completely true

I think the bigger snobbery is directed towards names not being "proper", or being "cutesy" (basically anything that ends with a "y"), and ironically people are already doing it on this thread. I think people on here are actually quite nasty about that at times, as well as way off the mark in terms of what will actually be the cultural norm when any child born now is grown up.

All through my adolescent, the name I loved most and wanted to give my future child was Eve/Evie. I only knew one person with that name at the time and I thought it was lovely. It is only since being the age where I would actually have kids that that name has become incredibly common, and it did take the shine off it. It being rare wasn't the reason I liked it, but at the same time it being Top 5 common has stopped me from hearing it in the same way I used to and it's just a standard name now. Just overexposure. I wouldn't say I feel any snobbery about it and in a way I'm quite sad I don't love it like I used to.

@aSofaNearYou

I think the bigger snobbery is directed towards names not being "proper", or being "cutesy" (basically anything that ends with a "y"), and ironically people are already doing it on this thread. I think people on here are actually quite nasty about that at times, as well as way off the mark in terms of what will actually be the cultural norm when any child born now is grown up.

All through my adolescent, the name I loved most and wanted to give my future child was Eve/Evie. I only knew one person with that name at the time and I thought it was lovely. It is only since being the age where I would actually have kids that that name has become incredibly common, and it did take the shine off it. It being rare wasn't the reason I liked it, but at the same time it being Top 5 common has stopped me from hearing it in the same way I used to and it's just a standard name now. Just overexposure. I wouldn't say I feel any snobbery about it and in a way I'm quite sad I don't love it like I used to.

I totally agree and I could see it from the poster above mentioning the name I’m giving my boy as “silly”. It’s his/her opinion, but no need to be that vindictive about it. It seemed to want to provoke a reaction and he/she got it. But, at the end of the day I don’t rally care because we both love that name. It will suit him as a baby and as an adult.

It isn't snobbery to have an opinion that differs to yours. I wouldn't want my child to spend their life being Tall Alfie, Short Alfie, Fat Alfie, Alfie B, Alfie Jones, Postman Alfie, Red Car Alfie etc. That's MY choice so if someone asked my OPINION that's what I'd tell them. It doesn't mean they can't use it or if sneer at them in the street.

Meanwhile anyone wanting to use an unusual name is usually accused of trying too hard, being chavvy, etc

I think the secret on MN is to go for 5-55 in the popularity stakes

@SleepingStandingUp

It isn't snobbery to have an opinion that differs to yours. I wouldn't want my child to spend their life being Tall Alfie, Short Alfie, Fat Alfie, Alfie B, Alfie Jones, Postman Alfie, Red Car Alfie etc. That's MY choice so if someone asked my OPINION that's what I'd tell them. It doesn't mean they can't use it or if sneer at them in the street.

Meanwhile anyone wanting to use an unusual name is usually accused of trying too hard, being chavvy, etc

I think the secret on MN is to go for 5-55 in the popularity stakes

When you lambaste someone for choosing a name and calling it “silly “ , that’s snobbery. When you call someone out for choosing a popular name, that’s snobbery. There’s having a difference of opinion, then there’s being a bit vindictive about it. Completely different things altogether.

You asked for reasons, though. And then you go on to say those reasons are “ridiculous”. That’s snobbery in itself. I said I’m fine with popular names, but not shortened names. I gave my reasons. Those reasons are not snobbery.

When you lambaste someone for choosing a name and calling it “silly “ , that’s snobbery. When you call someone out for choosing a popular name, that’s snobbery. No, because my dislike of that name of anything really popular has nothing to do with me Thinking your socially inferior. If you think anyone who disagrees with you thinks you're beneath them, you need to look at your own issues.
There’s having a difference of opinion, then there’s being a bit vindictive about it give one example of someone being vindictive? No one is trying to hurt you or be spiteful , they're just replying to a question about opinions on a name.

If you don't care about opinions, don't ask. If you're going to accuse anyone who disagrees as treating you as below them and being deliberately spiteful, don't ask.

I remember asking about the name Balthazar. I knew I'd get a variety of opinions. Imo people liking unusual names get more comments about them (you're trying to hard, you think your kids is special and it isn't, you're going to be the reason your child is bullied) and popular names get comments about the name (it's too popular, I wouldn't pick a royal name, there will be 15 in the class)

I most definitely wouldn't want my children to have been named with " popular" names, however none of their names could be classed as unusual. It's seems like every other child these days is named Chloe, Olivia, Isabel, grace or Amelia, Arthur, Oliver, Jack, Freddie or Ethan!

I don't generally like popular names not because of snobbery but because they're overexposed.

But I also wouldn't use cutesy names or old man/lady names or flower names. Doesn't mean I hate them or think they're ugly, just that they don't "do it" for me.

Both my sons have surnames for first names and we all know how Mumsnet feels about those. I just don't get all butt hurt if others feel differently.

The one thing I don't get is when posters declare "but could you imagine a high court judge named Alfie or Daisy?" Why would I worry about a hypothetical future where a daughter or son smart enough to become a high court judge is judged on their first name?

There is far more snobbery on here about "lower class" names than popular names frankly.

Or that “ie” names are not proper names...

I have an Archie myself named after a family member who is now in his 90s and he is just “Archie” he also had no problem securing a very good job with the name Archie..

I don't think it's snobbery I think people are just put off by names being popular. Myself included. Snobbery to me implies you're judging others who go for it. I don't do that. I had three girls with my name in the same year and I didn't like it. Though it is less a problem nowadays as I saw there were double the amount of girls with my name born in my year of birth than there are for the number one position just now. So there's more variety.

Also I think there's a difference in response to popular names like Jack and James to names such as Jaxon. The first two are classics and are seen as not giving away class whereas names like Jaxon are seen more as trend which might not age well. It could be said there is some snobbery when it comes to designating names as giving away class, but just because someone points it out doesn't mean they themselves believe it - just that that's a societal view of it.

@Strokethefurrywall

I don't generally like popular names not because of snobbery but because they're overexposed.

But I also wouldn't use cutesy names or old man/lady names or flower names. Doesn't mean I hate them or think they're ugly, just that they don't "do it" for me.

Both my sons have surnames for first names and we all know how Mumsnet feels about those. I just don't get all butt hurt if others feel differently.

The one thing I don't get is when posters declare "but could you imagine a high court judge named Alfie or Daisy?" Why would I worry about a hypothetical future where a daughter or son smart enough to become a high court judge is judged on their first name?

There is far more snobbery on here about "lower class" names than popular names frankly.

Totally agree.

Snobbery is directed more at names which are perceived by MN’s predominantly middle class membership as ‘made-up’, ‘chavvy’ or worst of all, both.

Well, names can date you. And different names date differently. For example, there were loads of girls named Sarah and Emma when I was at school. Although 'overused', these are classic names that are likely to kick around in the background for a while before coming back. Even now Sarah is still within the top 150 names, while other names that were popular in the 1980s (eg Joanne, Gemma, Jason) are a lot further down the list.

Names like Shirley, Linda, Brenda, Gary and Eric are also tied to a very specific era. It's just something to be aware of.

However, I think there's more information out there about baby name lists now. The UK didn't even used to collect data on the top ten names. We also have the internet to give us more info. Parents just used to pick names that sounded nice to them - they would have no real way of knowing whether a name was in the top 10 or top 100. Now parents are a bit more cautious about having a too-popular name.

Also, I think I read somewhere that there's more variety in names now. So whereas 12,000 girls might have been called Sarah in 1980, making it the number 1 name (figure entirely made up), only 6,000 girls might have the number 1 name in 2020.

If you look back to the Tudor period, variety was terrible: three of Henry VIII's wives were called Catherine, two were Anne and one was Jane. Other Tudor names for females were Elizabeth, Margaret and Mary, and that was about it.

Tudor men were almost all Thomas, William, Henry and John.

Personally, I'd be hesitant about choosing a name that came from nowhere and is likely to fall just as quickly. I'd be okay with a name that is very popular but has enough heritage behind it to make it fashionable without being faddy - I would put Sophia and Sophie in this bracket.

@AgeLikeWine

Snobbery is directed more at names which are perceived by MN’s predominantly middle class membership as ‘made-up’, ‘chavvy’ or worst of all, both.

True, but what name constitutes chavvy though ? I suppose a girls name like Chelsea I might perceive a bit Chavvy, but what other names would you say ? I personally wouldn’t go for a name like this, but I wouldn’t insult someone for choosing a name of that ilk.

Quite simply, names are signifiers and help define the ‘herd’ parents and their children belong to. It’s a reality whether people like it or not.

So some people want to be in the herd with unique names, others with traditional proper names, some with celebrity names. Whichever category you are in, your choice of names for your children signals you are similar to others making similar choices and different to other groups. It’s always the way and always will be regardless of whether people feel that’s right or not.

I think there’s a difference between not wanting there to be four children with the same name in one class and picking a really unique name for the sake of it. There’s definitely a middle ground in there. I would be wary of the top 20 as I personally would like to limit the chances of my child being ‘Sarah M’ for all their school days (obviously I know this can still be the case no matter what name given) but there are plenty of perfectly common names outside of the top 20 that aren’t unusual for the sake of being so.

Couldn’t agree more. When pregnant with DD I wanted a less popular name, I have a very popular name, in my friendship group of 5, 3 of us have the same name. Picked a name we loved and never heard anyone else with the same name, literally got onto the hospital ward after giving birth, baby in the bed next to us had DD’s name. It’s just luck of the draw with names that your child with mix with other children with the same name.

Maybe some of us suggested not to use Ava etc because WE were the kids with the overused name and it sucked being always being “Kathryn Llewellyn” in a class with 5 other Kathryns, 3 Catherines, 4 Katies, 2 Kates, a Kat and a Cait!!! All the time you are looking across longingly at Francesca and Anastasia’s name pegs and thinking “why were my parents so boring?”

As parents we aspire to have a bit more imagination and love in picking our kids names!

Snobbery is about someone thinking they're better. Not wanting a popular name because it's now "common" is snobbery.

Trying to avoid real or perceived issues of a popular name isn't snobbery. It's a difference in priorities.

I didn't really consider popularity. I did want names that had one English pronunciation and used the most common spelling (though one still gets his name misspelt all the time with a spelling I'd never seen before). Guess what kind of name I have?

I also wouldn't give my children names with the same first initial, because my siblings and I all have the same first initial and it was a large pain in the ass. I don't think I'm better than a parent who keeps to a pattern, but on baby name threads where it comes up, yeah, I say it's a pain and wouldn't want it just like I tell stories of my sister - who has a boy's name - being put into boys PE twice after a move and often dealt with being called he when her name was called.

There have been a lot of threads with comments that go on about how tacky, unneeded, and complicating having 2 middle names can be. My children and I all have two middle names. The tacky comments can be snobbish, but I don't think people rightfully saying that it can be an issue your name ends up too long to fit on ID (something I've had, by 1 letter) or how rarely people use middle names in most places and it's unneeded are being snobs. It's not. We all make our own choices in this.

True, but what name constitutes chavvy though ? I suppose a girls name like Chelsea I might perceive a bit Chavvy, but what other names would you say ? I personally wouldn’t go for a name like this, but I wouldn’t insult someone for choosing a name of that ilk.

But you have just done so. Can’t you see? Why would you not pick Chelsea as a name? Chelsea is not a popular name. It’s unusual. You have made a judgment on the name Chelsea, and called it “a bit chavvy”. You wouldn’t do that if you met a real life Chelsea, just as anyone commenting on names here wouldn’t comment in real life.

Fully intend to call our daughter Emily despite its never ending popularity. Popular names are often classic and lovely.

@daisypond

True, but what name constitutes chavvy though ? I suppose a girls name like Chelsea I might perceive a bit Chavvy, but what other names would you say ? I personally wouldn’t go for a name like this, but I wouldn’t insult someone for choosing a name of that ilk.

But you have just done so. Can’t you see? Why would you not pick Chelsea as a name? Chelsea is not a popular name. It’s unusual. You have made a judgment on the name Chelsea, and called it “a bit chavvy”. You wouldn’t do that if you met a real life Chelsea, just as anyone commenting on names here wouldn’t comment in real life.

I wouldn’t call anyone silly though for calling their kid chelsea, which is exactly what you did to describe my reasoning for calling my child the name I’m going to give him. I personally wouldn’t call them that, but wouldn’t insult someone who chose that name, which is exactly what you did to me. Totally different, so don’t try to justify it.

Also I said I might “perceive” chelsea as slightly chavvy.