Snobbery to popular names

[Tblock]

Anyone get the feeling of a lot of snobbery when it comes to popular names ? I have seen it on here a lot. “Oh I don’t like Alifie, it’s far to popular and over done “ “ Ava way to popular and over used “ etc etc. Seen it a lot of times when people have wanted an opinion and specifically mention a popular name. I don’t feel anyone should feel like they can’t name a child a name they love, just because it’s a popular name and is a “trend” as such. I know it’s all opinions, but I get the impression people don’t like certain names, purely because they are popular and it’s the in thing to do in bashing popularity. If you want to name you’re child a name that will probably have another 6 of the same in his/her school then so be it. Nobody had an issue when we were in school and everyone was called jack , Sarah, Daniel, Rachel etc, why such snobbery these days ? Just something I have picked up a lot

She specifically called parents selfish for picking a name like that. You clearly can’t read.

I did not say anything of the sort. I never mentioned selfish at all. You clearly can’t read. And you clearly don’t want to read anyone’s opinion but your own. But then don’t post on here and ask if you don’t want to hear the answers.

@ZoyaTheDestroyer

People passing on names because they feel it’s to popular, despite them really liking a name. Sad really.

Can you see the irony here? You are judging people for the criteria that they use to name their child.

Popularity was an important consideration for me when I was choosing my own children’s names. Who are you to declare that ‘sad’?

I think it’s sad when someone likes a name, but is put off when someone changes their opinion by expressing its to popular. That’s what I find sad.

@daisypond

She specifically called parents selfish for picking a name like that. You clearly can’t read.

I did not say anything of the sort. I never mentioned selfish at all. You clearly can’t read. And you clearly don’t want to read anyone’s opinion but your own. But then don’t post on here and ask if you don’t want to hear the answers.

Sorry not selfish. Controlling you said, which I found bloody weird in itself.

@Tblock, you said Chelsea was slightly chavvy, yet a pp gets flak for saying Alfie is silly.

When I was due my dd now age 14 I was absolutely stuck on a certain name that I had loved for ages and wasn't a popular choice. Then a character in a popular soap came along with the same name and it put me off as then all of a sudden their were babies being called this. I really regret now using it now as it was a name I have loved for a long time. X

I agree with a previous OP, I don't like shortened names entered on birth certificates. Nickname fine in day to day life. But Alfred is the proper name, Alf or Alfie the shortened version.

I always apply the judge test. Would it pass as a His Honour/Her Honour/Lady Justice etc

Isn't it because lots of people grew up in classes with multiples and remember how awkward and irritating it was. I was the "fat" one of 2 in my class. It was shit. So many Rebecca's and Sarah's in my year group, I definitely wanted to avoid that for my kids, but that might be my own issues.

I found it really hard to pick names for my dc because whilst I didn't want them to be one of 5 in their class, I also didn't want them to be so unusual they were the only one in the school. I was the only one with my name in both my primary and my massive 7 form entry secondary for the whole time I was there. Stuff like that bothers kids.

@Girlyracer but why would you apply a hypothetical title as a way of choosing your child's name? It's such a bizarre and arbitrary way of making a decision, as if you can steer your child's life based on the name you choose.

I mean can you ever imagine a prime Minister Boris? Oh no... wait.

I might also direct you to a lawyer named Cupcake LyVatt Brown who opened her own law office in San Diego in 2016. Graduated near top of her class. Her name doesn't seem to have slowed her down any.

Names don't have to denote class or skill when you have intelligent enough adults to look beyond previously conceived notions of what is right or proper.

@Tblock you don't need to ask me specifically, it's a PUBLIC forum where people give OPINIONS.

But it's ok, I accept your apology.

Are you even pregnant op or are you getting mock offended on principle that someone might not like a name you might not ever use?

I think that it is a good idea to give a blunt opinion on here because in real life people just say it's nice.

I've noticed that many posts focus on the first and middle names. You need to think about potential nn if the name is long or if it could be a bit silly with the surname.

When I was at school there were duplicated names, you know like 2 Ava Grace Smiths or something, so they would have nicknames.
And yes, they would be Big Ava and Little Ava, if one was taller than the other.

I don’t get it either.

I called my middle DS a very popular name. Got all sorts of rude comments like how he’ll be one of 10 in his class, no individuality, might as well just called him sheep generic child #300. He hasn’t started school yet but I’ve not met a single other toddler yet at groups with his name (clearly because everyone was avoiding it!) and don’t know a single one in his brothers year group at school.

However plenty of [insert Unique name of choice] at the groups. The amount of mums I’ve met who say oh I can’t believe there is a another Ruben At this group is crazy!

Although that being said I’m firmly in the camp of name your baby what you love and don’t be influenced by how popular the name
Is it what others think.

I agree with a previous OP, I don't like shortened names entered on birth certificates. Nickname fine in day to day life. But Alfred is the proper name, Alf or Alfie the shortened version. I always apply the judge test. Would it pass as a His Honour/Her Honour/Lady Justice etc

I really struggle to see why having a nickname as a name would have any impact on a person in this regard, though. When I meet a Tom, Steve, Dave or Fred etc, I might at some point ask if it was shortened but I wouldn't assume it was, as it often isn't, and it wouldn't affect my opinion of their ability to be professional at all. I think a lot of the "nicknames" people list on MN and say "everyone will assume it is short for x" are actually very common in their own right these days, and I don't think everybody does assume they are nicknames anymore.

I know what people are getting at with the more "cute" sounding nicknames like Alfie and Archie, but honestly I think people are failing to take into account that by the time these children are applying to be high court judges, there will have been 30 odd years of this being one of the most, if not the most common style of name, and it would be very odd for their peers to reject them for having it when they are so used to it.

It's not really snobbery, more I didn't want my kids to be like one of the 8 Katies in my year at school. Often popular names are nice, but you don't want your child to be Katy 6 or James M (as opposed to James A, B, C and D).

DD has a name which we sensed was getting more popular, and was happy with that as then it wouldn't be 'weird' but wouldn't be everywhere either. Funnily enough there are very few repeat names in her secondary school year but one other girl in her form with same first name and same surname initial!

It was all Katherine's and Jennifer's at my secondary. So much effort to come up with their own nn and spelling.
All Dave's where I used to work. Postie Dave. Army Dave. Navy Dave. Baker Dave.
All Amy's at my other job. Runner Amy. Little Amy. Doctor Amy. New Amy.

That's why is avoid it. Not because I think they're parents are somehow inferior to me

Tom, Steve, Dave or Fred
Friend's DC is just Tom. Other Toms I know are Thomas or variations of Thomas in their mother tongue (Tomos, Tomasz).
Steve - I'd assume was short for Stephen or Steven.
Dave - I know so many, presumably all Davids.
Fred - I know 2, one is Frederick and the other is Frédéric.

I don't think it is snobbery as such but agree with pp who suggest that the reason people often hesitate with really popular names (say top 10 or so) is twofold:

1. Some posters with popular names of their own generation disliked being known as "Sarah A" themselves and hope that if they pick a slightly less popular name (even if it's still in the top 50/100 or very well known) they stand a better chance of avoiding this for their child.
2. Most names date to some extent, but by either choosing a name that has always been well used (eg. James or Elizabeth sort of names) or going for a name that is much less common (but doesn't have to be strange or made up- say something like Claudia or Marcus); you can't as easily tell how old the person is just from their name. Not very important when they are a child, but could be annoying if they want to fudge their age when older.

There is nothing wrong with Alfie or Ava (to use 2 of your examples), they are nice names but in 50 years most people will likely to be able to guess what decade/s they were born in without meeting them, and they may well be one of several in their class/sport/hobby group, (which may or may not annoy them). That might bother you or not - it personally wouldn't stop me from using a name I've always really loved, but I might hesitate if there was another name I liked nearly as much without these problems and choose that instead.

@FluffyEggsontoast

But lots of people come on here and want opinions on names and that includes popularity doesn't it? So they can decide if that is a factor that bothers them or not. I've seen posters on her start threads saying "I like unique very rare names -so am thinking Arlo for a boy or Luna for a girl"

I think some people having a baby for the first time think "well I don't know anyone called [Arlo] so I expect it's really rare" so I think it's helpful if people tell them about the explosion of popularity in names like Arlo, Roman, Hunter, Luna, Arthur, Isla etc
I'm more familiar with the official chart lists now but I never used to be. If I heard of a baby named Noah or Ava 3 years ago (before my own kids) I'd honestly have thought it really unusual and would probably comment "wow that's unusual"

I was just thinking about how many posts from first time parents to be start with "I really like unusual names; do you think we'd get away with Oscar"

About 10 years ago a woman at work was talking about her new grand nieces, twins named Beatrice and Florence. Dreadful old lady names, what were their parents thinking, that sort of thing. My DD was at nursery at the time and I told her that Beatrice and Florence were the Emma and Katie of her DD's generation. She wasn't convinced.

Stroke, I note Cupcake is in America.....

I get what your saying. But I dont think its snobbery. I personally wouldnt choose a 'popular' name and I have said that as my opinion on threads multiple times. It just a preference. Yes when I was in school there were loads of Sarah's, Tom's and Emily's. My name is common and, again this is just my opinion, I found it boring. Just one of many. I always loved a different name! They stuck out and I remembered them. I hated being one of 6 or 7 other girls in my year. It was annoying.
Saying all this if a certain name was 100% my favourite name I would go for it even if it was on the charts. For instance I love the name Luna, which is high on the charts, I would of used it but I have a close friend with that name.
But it does put me off as I dont want my child to have the same name as 8 other children in their class. Just like if you have a name that you associate with someone bad imo. Each to their own at the end of the day. It's not snobbery, just an opinion. I found on here that people are MUCH more rude about names that are not ordinary and common. So people having the opinion that it's too popular is quite inoffensive.

See my only criteria for a name for my child would be that it hasn’t been used already by friends or family, I would like to use a different name (not fussed if it matches a middle name) and the most important thing is I like it and that it feels right.

I’m all prepared for possible future backlash over the names in my head for girls. One that I like is pretty popular (and a TV character) so people won’t bat an eyelid. My other couple of names, and the one I’m really set on, are much more unique. I wouldn’t call them insane - it’s not Cupcake or Hula Hoop or Penguin or any celebrity style - buts it’s also not in the top 1000. I just came across it and liked its meaning and it’s a very “me “ name. I once made the mistake of looking up threads with it on here and I would say it’s a very marmite name. Im sure if I have a girl and use the name I’ll get comments.

Boys names however, the ones I love are popular! All my friends and cousins and family friends in my generation who have had children in the last 6 years have all had boys. 12 little boys on my Christmas and birthday lists to buy for each year. And they’ve all got the most popular names so I’m slightly thin on the ground for popular choices anyway! I love Freddie - there’s a Freddie in every single class bar one at my school it’s crazy! Wouldn’t stop me though.

I also like welsh names - and have no connection to Wales at all so have been questioned about them.

To be honest, having spent my whole career in education the big thing for me is has any child just totally put me off a name? Oh yes. I’ve lost a few options. They’ve been ruined

I just find the most popular names really boring and dull. It’s not because they’re ugly or anything. I just wouldn’t choose them myself because I prefer names that I find fresh and interesting.

@FartnissEverbeans

I just find the most popular names really boring and dull. It’s not because they’re ugly or anything. I just wouldn’t choose them myself because I prefer names that I find fresh and interesting.

Exactly this. I just wouldn't want my children to have a name that dominates the top ten. I love having an unusual name - never had any trouble with it.

I've not read the whole thread.
I dislike very popular names because I find them boring. I'm not sure that that's snobbery?
I am snobby about lots of "uneek" names which often are awful and only used because of their rareness.
I do like unusual classical names and have done since childhood - don't know where it came from.