AIBU about Caoimhe

[Littleturkish]

DH and I have taken a long long time to choose this name, Irish heritage on both sides, Irish surname (and maiden name!) I love this name.

When DH agreed, he didn't realise how it was spelt. Now he knows. He thinks we should pick a different one. I have first hand experience of having a difficult Irish name to spell and think it will be fine.

AIBU? I don't want to start finding a new name all over again- is Caoimhe that awful to spell??

People here are unreal! Can you imagine if this thread was about an indian or chinese or whatever name, and OP was 2nd generation from that culture? Not one of you would dare to tell her that the names from her own culture are too hard to spell or unfair on the child. You wouldn't tell her to call her a proper white english name!

Caoimhe is only difficult if you have never heard of Niamh or Maebh or Siobhan or Sinead or any other irish name. Or you're just too thick to realise that other countries and cultures have languages and names that aren't all about your convenience.

It is not pronounced in any way like an English person would read the spelling. It's a very Irish name to give someone who will have an English accent. People will always be asking her 'are your parents Irish?' and she'll have to say 'no, but my grandfather lived there until he was 20' which sounds very tenuous. There are other Irish names you could use that can be pronounced in the English language.

I do like the name.

Maybe you should call her Jonathan. Amazed at some of the reactions here, if you love a name use it, no anglicanised spellings.

Everyone can spell Caiomhe surely? There was one on Big Brother!

I prefer Clover. Both nice though.

(I DID THAT ON PURPOSE)

Irish person here - are you going to pronounce it 'Kweeva' (most commonly heard) or 'keeva'?

'Keeva' would be considered really unusual here, whereas 'kweeva' is fairly commonplace.

Keeva is how it's pronounced in Ulster.

Sorry, obv late to the party

Agrees with what grockle said.

I don't like the name tho, sorry OP. It sounds very hard to my (welsh) ears if pronounced Keeva. And a bit like the cheesy crisps if pronounced Kweeva.
Sorry OP.

I like Roisìn out of the names that have been mentioned. (Sorry if fada is wrong!)

but Clover is fucking appalling and possible child cruelty, please don't

Dunno, as an Irish person who lived in London we always had a laugh over how some of my mates' names were pronounced / spelled. A few shortened or anglicised theirs to make life easier. Gotta say that I've always thought that Irish friends, who went on to have English kids, were mad to give them a Gaelic name. It was always the ones who were called Emma or Claire themselves...

"Can you imagine if this thread was about an indian or chinese or whatever name, and OP was 2nd generation from that culture?"

I don't think that's true at all, necessarily--if someone came in wanting to call their child Cao Xue or something, I would be honest and say "Your child will spend their life dealing with spelling and pronunciation errors. If you decide to go for it, I'd recommend you give a middle name that will cause fewer headaches, so that your child has some choice if they start to get really fed up with it." And most Indian names are easy enough for English speakers to pronounce more or less correctly based on the spelling.

I live in Tokyo and there is no way I would insist on calling my kid Alekusandoraa or whatever just because "Alexandra is my favorite British name and it's part of my heritage!!!" I chose a name that has a workable form in both languages that people are mostly able to spell and pronounce.

jimmy she'll be a able to claim a lot more heritage than that- but thanks for the dissmissive comment

Discussions are ongoing, thanks for all the suggestions- we've not quite made our minds up yet but we aren't far off.

Just to reiterate:

1. My OWN name is Irish, beyond difficult to spell, very unusual and mispronounced/spelt regularly. I don't mind, I love the meaning and story behind it.
2. We have a very Irish surname
3. No plans to live in Ireland, regular visits but for work reasons can't live there.
4. Loads of beautiful Irish names have been mentioned but can't be used as the names my my/his sisters and first cousins.
5. We'd pronounce Keeva as is common amongst our family/the people we know with the name.

I will update when baby is born...I'd still love Clover...

I have a friend called Saoirse and she used to hate her name but, she loves it now. Her dd does have an English name though!

I love Caoimhe, I think it's a lovely name spelled as it is.

Vile name. Please avoid!

There's a Caoimhe in my DDs class. It's a lovely name and all the children and teachers soon learned how to pronounce and spell it. Have no idea why some english people think gaelic names should be changed just to suit them.

Hate Clover though!

Vile? Odd over-reaction.

My cousins DD is called caoimhe (twin of eilish) and even though I know it is pronounced as keeva, my brain still reads kay-oim-he when I see it written down.

I think it is a lovely name but I do agree that it's going to be a pita to have to keep explaining the pronunciation/spelling to about 98% of the population that are bothered enough to ask.

FWIW I think Cliona is a lovely name and is similar to clover

Whqt people forget when they say that people will only need the explanation once is that thwt's once very time she meets anyone ne for the rest of her life!

Clueing I love that one too! It was also vetoed. He just didn't like it. Fussy bugger.

whatever the name, no matter how common/simple/short, there will always be someone who misspells it.
I teach one class with 3 kids called josh, 3 called jack and a selection of Milly/Millie/Mollie/Molly. it's a nightmare! the only thing I would advise is to ask for the phonetic spelling to be circulated to (secondary) teachers to avoid the repetitive conversation of how to pronounce her name in the first week of school. as a teacher I feel awful if I'm not sure how to pronounce a name when doing the register for the first time, and then panic for several weeks after because I'm not sure I have remembered it correctly! I always do my best to learn the names of all students I teach, so any pronunciation tips are welcomed

ab I am also a secondary school teacher, and we were thinking of adding the name spelt phonetically to SIMS in brackets to avoid that very problem!

Debating between Orlaith and Caoimhe now. Clover still isn't getting a look in! X

whatever the name, no matter how common/simple/short, there will always be someone who misspells it.
Yes. My daughter's name is Megan and she either has to constantly spell it or constantly deal with it being spelled incorrectly.

Sorry but proper Irish pronunciation for Caoimhe is Quee va, not Keeva. Bugs me so much.. Still think you should go with the name OP

The thing with caoimhe and Niamh and the like is they look pretty written down but sound quite dull and harsh when pronounced. Keeva sounds quite unattractive and if it were spelt keeva you probably wouldn't think about using it. For that reason I'm a no, it just sounds harsh and a bit rough.

Greencurtain Seriously call your baby Emma or Grace or something lovely and straightforward. WTF?

Hell, yeah, lets all quosh our heritage for the sake of spelling and lazy people who can't be bothered or can't appreciate another person's heritage. Lets tell anybody with a non easy spelling english name to do the same, anybody not from England basically. How ignorant.