14 weeks gender

[Lisanet]

Absolutely profoundly gutted after today’s ultrasound! I’m 13+6 dated 14 weeks and my whole life I had a premonition I’m gonna have an only child a girl. It lives within my soul. I was also predicted girl by random people in the past (without asking them) and the week before my missed period (had no idea as it was unplanned and unexpected) had a dream I gave birth to a baby girl. In today’s ultrasound the lady said she wasn’t sure as it’s too early but if she was to guess she thinks it looks like developing boy’s parts. I know it’s still not 100% but I’m really worried and really can’t believe it googling everything I can. Nub hasn’t been visible in any of my previous ultrasounds and they didn’t give me a picture of the parts from today.
Did it happen to anyone that the sonographer guessed boy early on and it was indeed a girl? Can anyone have a guess from a shape of a skull? Please don’t judge me for being so set on a girl…I want to cry now.

MNHQ has removed two images because they had a name on them - two remain

Lots of people have a preference and experience disappointment, I agree. But it's the level of disappointment here which is concerning. To say you are absolutely profoundly gutted to be having a boy, and and how you have to live with the disappointment like you've lived with other disappointment is just not normal. Most people have a slight moment about it and then get on with preparing for, bonding with, getting excited about and loving the baby they're going to have. Are you able to do that?

Mines the same. But comes home from nursery with beautiful French braids that she asks them to do and sits perfectly still for. At this point I think she's just messing with me for her own amusement.

You’re absolutely right that people often have a preference, and that gender disappointment is real.

But your level of disappointment is not, and I’d really encourage you to get it sorted before baby arrives, because it’s so easy for something like this to overshadow those early months, and they’re wonderful. They really are.

You won’t be alone in having imagined having a daughter and doing her hair and playing with dolls, but you’ve taken it to the next level by allowing that to become an expected reality for you… by buying the clothes, and forgetting it’s a daydream that you have no control over. And now your brain is stuttering on how your reality differs from the reality you’ve been living. A good therapist will be able to unravel all of this and help you to love your child, whoever they are.

Sure, maybe you’ll still hope for a girl one day, but you’ll be a lot more level and you don’t risk letting this interfere with your feelings for your boy/bonding/those early months.

Best of luck.

You, from your replies seem to have more than a gender preference. You seem to already have decided that having a baby boy is the worst possible thing to have happened to you. That is not a ' gender preference'. The fact that you are trying to normalise your behaviour and attitude by saying ' oh everyone has a gender preference ( well maybe, but they do not think not having that gender is the worst thing that could possibly happen to them). You will be a single parent, so it sounds like your son will only have you. No one to protect them or look out for them as a parent should, but you. Frankly, as a mother of sons and from your replies, I would not want you looking after my boys as a nanny or whoever you were. It is not normal, and you seem determined to see being disappointed in your child before it's even born as being normal. You need urgent therapy, but for it to work you need to accept that your feelings are irrational and extreme. Most of all you need to want to be a good mother to your child and work towards it. I hope for his sake that you do. It's not a given that you will suddenly love a child you are already thinking of as ' the worst thing to happen to you' because he is a boy.

Look up the word gender,there are 100 to choose from if you don't like the sex your baby is born with.

@DramaLlamaBangBang in the first place, yesterday when writing this post I was still overaly emotional and couldn’t accept it. It’s a process and it does take time and I must say I already feel bit calmer even though I still wish for a girl of course nothing has changed. Secondly you’re right I had my mind too strongly set on one gender which is obviously never good. Thirdly don’t worry as a nanny I really didn’t care if I looked after boys or girls as they were not mine, with all the love but it’s not the same as if their yours and forever. It’s not personal. And as an employer you’d obviously never known or even had a tiniest suspicion what I want for myself. I’ve been with some wonderful families looking after boys and we were happy together. I love how some people like to make someone looks so bad and everything is either black or white. Bit funny.

@Nannyfannybanny what? Little bit dumb comment don’t you think?😂

Thirdly don’t worry as a nanny I really didn’t care if I looked after boys or girls as they were not mine, with all the love but it’s not the same as if their yours and forever. It’s not personal. And as an employer you’d obviously never known or even had a tiniest suspicion what I want for myself.
So while you were enthusiastically dressing the girls in pretty outfits, plaiting their hair and saying how cute they were, what were you doing with the boys? I certainly would have noticed if my boys were being ignored by their childminder while they were busy playing dollies with the girls! You seemed from your later comments to be even more determined to normalise your feelings than before. So I hope you have become more rational.

Honestly. You sound like a troll. No real person is this ridiculous. I hope this thread gets taken down.

@Overthebow I will have to as I have no plans on not loving my own child.

You've tagged me in a reply which doesn't relate remotely to what I said, as if you haven't understood.

I'm didn't say I was, and am not, aghast at the fact you or other women might ask others to give an opinion on an image (although you have said the stills don't show what could be seen, so it does seem a little more pointless in your case...)

I'm finding it more than ridiculous that you're prioritising and privileging an unsolicited 'random stranger' from your past and their prophecy of you giving birth to a girl in the future, rather than listening to the medical professional whose opinion you asked based on the technology available during your pregnancy.

Gender and sex are not interchangeable
First is a man-made concept open to theorists, second is an actual scientific fact of life.

@Lisanet soooo ... is it a boy or a girl?

@Koalie 😂😂 I almost forgot about this post! Thank you for asking but decided not to find out till birth😊. Baby should come beginning of February so not long to go! I’ll remember to update once it’s here.