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Original poster

Parents: if you had one day of your pre children life back, how would you spend it? Please keep it lighthearted

226 replies

Grommmm · 27/06/2023 19:05

I love my kids, the baby and the toddler. They are beautiful, funny, joyful and life enhancing. But they are also exhausting and consume all our time, money, worry and attention!! Looking back I can’t believe how much freedom, energy and spare cash (relative) we had before we had kids but also that we didn’t really realise what we had and make the most of it before having them. The pandemic was partly to blame for this, as it shut down a lot of opportunities to do things like travel.

Oh to have one day, or even half a day a month without my kids and the associated worry and tiredness and with some of the energy and free time I used to have back. Would I write a novel, have a day long bath, learn a new instrument, just spend all day reading in a coffee shop???

What would you do?

Caveat - you can’t spent it doing kid-admin or cleaning the house or any sort of catching up - this is a day from your old life when kid-admin didn’t exist and your whole house wasn’t covered in pasta sauce and nappies.

Second caveat - I know having kids is a huge privilege and lots of people would give anything to have them. This discussion isn’t about that, hence using childfree not childless. It’s just a lighthearted chat about how even though kids are wonderful, you still give up a lot when you have them and wouldn’t it be nice to get just a little bit of it back occasionally.

OP posts:
Catchasingmewithspiders · 27/06/2023 21:38

Apparently if you dont want kids one day of being forced to look after them, and taking them to Alton Towers is enough to make you see how fun it us.

See the JOY people, see the JOY

LadyVictoriaSponge · 27/06/2023 21:39

DeeplyLoathesome · 27/06/2023 21:37

Good one 🙄

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Yes I thought so. Your username is an interesting choice.

Brrrrrrrrrrrr · 27/06/2023 21:39

Oh OP let me tell you, it is NOT wasted on this child free person!

I knew deep down in my soul from my teens that parenthood was not for me. I’m fortunate to have nieces and a nephew for those festive moments on Instagram and to peruse the wares in The Entertainer every now and then. In short I can dip in and out as I choose.

To have that responsibility and financial drain constantly though…wow…I… just couldn’t. I salute all you parents and I feel for those longing for the 18th birthdays 🫢

Child free IS as great as you’d imagine 😎😉💰🛩️🍾

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 27/06/2023 21:40

Me and DH are off for two weeks next week. The kids will still go to nursery on their usual 3 days.
Cannot bloody wait. For once we will actually get a break!

red78hot · 27/06/2023 21:42

I'd catch up on tidying up the house.

Capitalismwantsyou · 27/06/2023 21:48

Grommmm · 27/06/2023 19:58

It’s not a put down of childfree people, it’s a put down of myself for not taking more advantage of my life pre kids. Sounds like some of your childfree friends are taking full advantage of it and doing things that I wish I’d done before parenthood made doing them harder - good on them! 😃

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Gosh this thread is unexpected! I was expecting people to be reminiscing of naps, eating chocolate openly etc

Capitalismwantsyou · 27/06/2023 21:49

MouseSculptureMadeOfOldHairbrushFluff · 27/06/2023 20:12

(I do feel that threads on MN can be about the most innocuous shizz and will still be overtaken by the professionally fuming. Someone will start a thread saying that they really love toast only to be chastised by someone who accuses the OP of having little regard for coeliacs)

🤣🤣🤣

CJat10 · 27/06/2023 21:53

MouseSculptureMadeOfOldHairbrushFluff · 27/06/2023 20:12

(I do feel that threads on MN can be about the most innocuous shizz and will still be overtaken by the professionally fuming. Someone will start a thread saying that they really love toast only to be chastised by someone who accuses the OP of having little regard for coeliacs)

:) this

LanaDelRaybans · 27/06/2023 21:59

ATerrorofLeftovers · 27/06/2023 19:59

What a shame the po-faced have sucked the lightness out of the thread. Entirely predictable tho.

OP, I’ll take your question in the spirit in which it was intended.

If I had a free day I would:

Lie in, then have a leisurely shower with scented products.

Go to a nice cafe and eat a late breakfast outside, in peace.

Then I’d waft off to a museum or art gallery to catch an exhibition

Have a nice cafe/restaurant lunch in peace.

Wander by the river or in a nice park. In peace.

Have an acupuncture session.

Wander home and eat a light supper not shopped for and cooked by me, then get into my dressing gown and watch a great film or a couple of episodes of a favourite series. In peace.

The general theme being doing what I want, not catering to others’ demands and being in command of my own brain and not subject to constant chatter. Ie actually having some agency and peace and quiet.

Can I come please this is perfection 😂

MeinKraft · 27/06/2023 22:03

I would say I'd go for a hike up a mountain and on to a café before a swim and aromatherapy session in a spa. But realistically I'd spend it eating snacks, sleeping and scrolling through my phone.

fairywhale · 27/06/2023 22:04

Childfree is a nasty hateful word.

WantToBeHappyAndHealthy · 27/06/2023 22:06

If it makes you feel any better op, I am childfree and miserable.

MargotBamborough · 27/06/2023 22:06

fairywhale · 27/06/2023 22:04

Childfree is a nasty hateful word.

Hateful towards whom...?

Springbuds38 · 27/06/2023 22:06

Beer garden for sure! And I’d save more but also book more holidays/city breaks etc, don’t know what my money used to go on before kids but I always seemed to piss it up the wall, now I have to be so careful with each penny.

WantToBeHappyAndHealthy · 27/06/2023 22:09

fairywhale · 27/06/2023 22:04

Childfree is a nasty hateful word.

Better than that godawful "childless" label that is slapped onto us infertile folk 😒

MeinKraft · 27/06/2023 22:15

fairywhale · 27/06/2023 22:04

Childfree is a nasty hateful word.

What would you replace it with?

MouseSculptureMadeOfOldHairbrushFluff · 27/06/2023 22:19

fairywhale · 27/06/2023 22:04

Childfree is a nasty hateful word.

wut? Confused

MouseSculptureMadeOfOldHairbrushFluff · 27/06/2023 22:24

maybe 'sans enfants' would be more chic and acceptable!

Ohidunnodoi · 27/06/2023 22:38

I understand completely what you’re saying, op, I don’t understand why some are taking this personally/being so sensitive.
We were childfree for 40 years, trying to conceive for 9 years before Dd came along, she’s a joy, the person I love more than anyone in the world, our lives are filled with lots of new friends, just so much to do, so rushed, no time to think.
I think I did appreciate our lives before, it was almost so good, I knew it couldn’t last forever, if that makes sense?
Perfect day would be one like the many we had. Long lie in, no rush, just peace and only myself to really think about (and dog ) walk in the woods in the sunshine with our dogs, maybe lunch out or bbq in the garden. Maybe lie around, have a nap. Later on, head to the beach (live abroad) sunbathe, swim, drink sangria, listen to music, read…swim again at sunset, head home, lie on the hammock or watch a film, maybe have sex, or like a previous poster said..lazy sex in the morning.
Also miss just heading for something to eat and drinks then the cinema, look around the shops etc, with no time limit or paying for a babysitter.
Ahh..it was a special time, when we’re sort of free again, we’ll be mid-late 50’s and perhaps won’t want to lie on beaches drinking wine..(or maybe we will 🤷🏻‍♀️😂) When I really think about it, I feel sad that moment has gone
Then saying all that, I feel horrendously guilty 😩I love being a parent too, they’re just v v different lives

ATerrorofLeftovers · 27/06/2023 22:48

LanaDelRaybans · 27/06/2023 21:59

Can I come please this is perfection 😂

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On condition you don’t chat my ears off about Minecraft, Miniverse or the Teenage Kraken. I must be permitted to speak whole sentences without being fucking interrupted every three seconds, just for once. I won’t cut up your food and we won’t be turning the film off in favour of Phineas and Ferb.

I’ve forgotten what any of that feels like.

ThisIsACoolUserName · 27/06/2023 22:50

I'm childfree by choice at 39 and it's not wasted on me - I have a fantastic life and enjoy every day!
DH and I are heading off for a break in our campervan this weekend and I can't wait!

Hawkins0001 · 27/06/2023 22:52

ThisIsACoolUserName · 27/06/2023 22:50

I'm childfree by choice at 39 and it's not wasted on me - I have a fantastic life and enjoy every day!
DH and I are heading off for a break in our campervan this weekend and I can't wait!

Have a great and safe trip, anywhere nice?

BadLad · 27/06/2023 22:52

We childfree truly are life’s failures. We can’t even do being childfree as well as people with children can do it.

Butchyrestingface · 27/06/2023 22:55

I don't get it. OP posts about having one half day or even full day of leisure per month to oneself and people are responding with plans to travel round an entire subcontinent in that time. What method of transport are you planning on using?? Confused.

ThisIsACoolUserName · 27/06/2023 22:58

Hawkins0001 · 27/06/2023 22:52

Have a great and safe trip, anywhere nice?

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Thank you. We're off to the Cotswolds :)

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