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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband has walked out.

109 replies

Confusedpenguon · 17/02/2019 12:50

AIBU- so about a week ago my husband of 25 years walked out and left me and the children while I was at work to live at a friends house. He said this was nothing to do with me or our relationship it was simply that he was suffering with chronic pain and that he didn’t want to snap at us or be around anyone. Have barely seen him all week just a few calls and messages. Then last night it transpires he’s going out drinking with his friends. This morning I told him that I no longer believed him why he had left us as if he was in too much pain to be around anyone he wouldn’t be at the pub. Also he’s managed to go the gym all week and chat online till all hours with friends. So now he thinks I’m being unreasonable and a bitch and is refusing to answer my messages - am I in the wrong? or is he a lying t@at?

OP posts:
Juells · 18/02/2019 09:34

Poor guy - the OP not being supportive, when all he wants is to be alone so he can have phone-sex with that lovely woman in America. Hmm

I'm sorry, OP but this is all about having time on his own, it isn't about saving his family from his bad humour.

MashedSpud · 18/02/2019 09:44

She could be over here visiting and they are both staying at his friends house. You see his car parked outside but do you knock on the door?
He could have spun her a lie about being single and bought a place to fix up.

Babygrey7 · 18/02/2019 09:47

Knew it was an OW

Very very rare for a man to leave the family home unless there is an OW

Springwalk · 18/02/2019 14:37

Op why is HE angry? Angry about what?

Is he expecting you to go there?
To ask him to come home?
Angry he is in pain?

You need to be clear why he is upset. I certainly can’t see why on earth he is upset with you. Unless there is something you haven’t told us.

Jamiefraserskilt · 18/02/2019 15:04

How would he feel if the situation were reversed?
30 messages a day from some bloke
Left whilst he was at work
Out with your mates and in the gym
Told him you can't cope with pain and family life
Moved into an empty shithole rather than stay in your lovely home....

Yippeee · 18/02/2019 15:08

He can message his lady friend all day long now.

Yippeee · 18/02/2019 15:09

I think you’re being way too generous and understanding regarding the ow op.

Bunnybaubles · 18/02/2019 16:54

I agree with MashedSpud sounds like the woman from America has come for a visit.

Suddenly needing to go nc with his wife and kids??

I've lived with chronic pain since 2012 and I have never used that as an excuse to walk out on my family. If I want space I go upstairs!

Juells · 18/02/2019 19:35

The poor man. What could possibly have driven him to going all alone to an empty house Hmm Hmm Hmm

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