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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

TEACHERS AIBU?

79 replies

tryingtobemarypoppins2 · 08/07/2010 22:08

Mums who are teachers, AIBU?

In September I will be going back to teaching 3 days a week, leaving my 2 DS's 6months and 2.7 years twice a week with my parents and once a week at nursery.

I went back part time after my first DS was born and it was ok but I questioned then just how ideal teaching and bringing up a young family was. The stress levels in my school can be high, although I was always home by 5 and the hols were great.

AIBU to be thinking of doing something else?? My sister works part time for an airline. She is away from home 6 days a month but they are always weekends and she can take her LO to school everyday etc. She pays nothing for childcare as a result. I am considering joining her but my DH thinks I am mad giving up a well paid role etc etc

WDYT?

OP posts:

Rosieeo · 08/07/2010 22:11

Are you sure you'll be able to get a job with an airline easily and quickly? Will the pay be the same?

Doigthebountyeater · 08/07/2010 22:13

I used to be a teacher. I did return to work after DS1 but was miserable. Teaching is nowhere near as family friendly as people believe it to be. If you can get another job (as cushy as your sister's) go for it. Mind you it is quite hard to get part time posts in teaching so don't give up your job without something decent to go to.

Original poster

tryingtobemarypoppins2 · 08/07/2010 22:19

The money is a great deal less. I bring home £1400 and the most I would get flying is around £800 a month according to my sister. But I would save on childcare, petrol etc.

On one hand I really want to be home more and later on be there to take the boys to school. On the other hand I am not sure about the long term effects of leaving teaching.

OP posts:

Dysgu · 08/07/2010 22:21

I will watch this with interest.

I went back ft when DD1 was 7 months old. Was in a primary school. Had great childminders who were like second parents to my baby and lived 6 doors away! I moved to a different school when DD1 was 1yo so I could stop the 7am-6pm days (had been senior management but became 'just' a class teacher again.)

DD1 was 2.3 yo when DD2 arrived. I went back 0.84 last September when DD2 was 9 mo but in the middle school so am working 8 - 5 three days a week and 8-1 two days a week.

This September I am going to be ft again - DD1 is in pre-school 3 days a week and they go to my mum's once a week. A (different but still great) childminder does the rest of my childcare during term time.

My school is closing in August 2011 and I do not have a job to move to (yet) - and, despite loving my job, I am seriously considering giving up and finding something else. Have no idea what but just seems like an easier option as far as school runs, covering ill kids, etc etc etc are concerned.

DP is concerned with financial change but sometimes it just seems I do miss all the highlights and the hard times feel harder (like recent chicken pox!)

Sorry, no idea what you should do - I guess each situation is different - but interested to see what other teachers who are parents have to say.

Good luck whatever you decide.

KnottyLocks · 08/07/2010 22:21

You are not BU to consider something else if you feel that the stress load may become too much.
However, most part-time jobs will require a certain amount of juggling.
The pay-off with teaching will always be the holidays but you should also consider the pension (which is a good one compared to many company pensions) and the possibility of taking on additional responsibility, career advancement and hours once your sons are at school.

Can't tell you what to do. Teaching is very much a vocation: you need to be happy in your job to do it well. If you enjoy it and it fits in with your family life, carry on.

What are the prospects like working for an airline? Would you get the same level of job satisfaction?

daisymiller · 08/07/2010 22:21

I do think teaching is stressful with a young family, I have been working obscene hours this week and had no time for my family at all. The idea of being home for 5 and working 3 days a week does sound quite heavenly to me, but I appreciate the grass is not always greener.

As Rosie says will it be that easy to get a job.

cat64 · 08/07/2010 22:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

daisymiller · 08/07/2010 22:24

My husband and I have had the same conversation tonight, he is fed up of watching me work from the moment I get up until the moment I go to bed and has asked me to think of a different job.

ivykaty44 · 08/07/2010 22:25

its not easy getting airline work and have more than one firned trained and out of work atm and doing other jobs such as waitressing

hopalongdagger · 08/07/2010 22:26

I only have one DC (so far) but in all honesty if I could find a job outside teaching that would suit me, I would go straight for it. I find both the hours and the stress levels very hard to deal with, and it affects my home life a lot because I feel like I don't have time to get the housework done or spend as much time as I want with DD. And this is only working 3 days.

Something else to consider though is staying in teaching but changing schools (although PT posts are quite hard to find). I've got my eyes open for a PPA cover job, or perhaps reading recovery- teaching but without some of the pressures that come from being a class teacher.

chibi · 08/07/2010 22:28

Maybe look for work at another school

no job is without stress/downsides

try to think longterm- which job is what you'd like to be doing at 40 or 50?

The kids won't be babies forever

try to find ways to work smarter, not longer or harder iyswim

daisymiller · 08/07/2010 22:29

I think if I could thing of something else that would suit me I would leave.

A vocation is all well and good but not if it slowly robbing you of your life.

Original poster

tryingtobemarypoppins2 · 08/07/2010 22:29

Great post cat64. Are you an advisor??

OP posts:

pudding25 · 08/07/2010 22:30

I have one DD (2yrs) and teach 3 day job share. I actually seem to work most nights and often at the weekend as I can only work when DD is asleep or out the house. It is bloody hard work and I was thinking about looking for something else. However, when I weighed up the cut in salary/pension/holidays and the thought that when DD and any other kids I have are at school and I don't have to pay for childcare/can work on days off rather than evenings/weekends -well, I thought I would keep at it for the time being and see how it goes.
It is tough.

loopyloops · 08/07/2010 22:32

I'm in the same position. My options are, in order of preference:

Get a different job
Get a p/t teaching job
Supply

I agree with Doig, don't do it unless you're sure you have a good job to go to.

cat64 · 08/07/2010 22:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

piscesmoon · 08/07/2010 22:36

YANBU-Teaching really isn't family friendly, except for the holidays-however I have never found an alternative.

Original poster

tryingtobemarypoppins2 · 08/07/2010 22:36

Spot on daisymiller, although these questions always come up at this time of year as teachers are always so so so tired.

The airline my sister works for (the red one ;) ) have just started advertising contracts so that sounds secure, but no, I wouldn't want to be doing it long term. My sister seems to pick and choose her routes and can swap days around so it wouldn't have to be weekends when the boys are at school......although that would make childcare hard to plan......ummmmmmmmm

OP posts:

Original poster

tryingtobemarypoppins2 · 08/07/2010 22:40

cat64 I have my toe in the advisory waters being an AST, but all our advisors are losing their jobs at the moment so any chance of moving in that direction seems poor It would be a good option though.

OP posts:

daisymiller · 08/07/2010 22:41

If I could get a part time teaching job I would do, I would happily give up my reponsibility and extra pay to go back to being a classroom teacher 2 or 3 days a week and have time with my family without feeling guilty about it.

Original poster

tryingtobemarypoppins2 · 08/07/2010 22:45

Come and job share with me daisy!! (My job share is hard work )

OP posts:

daisymiller · 08/07/2010 22:48

I have put in a request for a job share/ part time arrangement and had it refused.

judytzuke · 08/07/2010 22:55

Interesting thread. I am a HT with small children; my DCs and my DH have asked me to give it up! I've been teaching for 18 years and a Ht for 8 years - don't know what else I would do. But you are all right - teaching's not as family friendly as you think. I am in a permanent grump with my own DCs after a day of being bright and cheerful with everyone else's!

clam · 08/07/2010 23:03

I've been mulling this one over too for a long while. But I always get stuck on what the hell else to do which is ultimately as satisfying. And reasonably paid.
And then we have another holiday and I forgive it everything!
I did ppa cover for 2 years, which was about half, if not a third of the workload of a class teacher. But if I'm honest, I was glad to get back in class in the end, albeit with all the extra responsibility. But I couldn't, or wouldn't want to, manage that fulltime, even now my kids are older. It's much tougher when they're tiny.
But it makes a massive difference to have a head teacher who supports a mum's need to nip out occasionally to watch their own child's sports day. Stiff like that makes it bearable.

Original poster

tryingtobemarypoppins2 · 08/07/2010 23:03

daisymiller Refused! On what grounds?? The NUT were fantastic at sorting out my job share and mine was a nightmare as I am also an AST. What have you been advised?

judytzuke the advisory route may be worth thing about???

OP posts:

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