To put my 3.5 month old baby in nursery

[strawberrycake]

I'm being made to feel like an awful mother for doing this. Basically I have to work, but can afford to get by on p/t money. An excellent opportunity has come up at work for a 2 day a week well paid position and it's mine if I want it.

So my choice is-
return to work when baby is 3.5 months old for 2 days
or
wait the intended 9 months but then end up full time.

I decided the best option is the first as in the long run we have lots of quality time together and I can be around for him. I have taken him to a few nurseries to check them out and he seems to love the atmosphere. He's always loved new places/ people (we joke it started after being born with 12 people in the room!). He's not a clingy baby at all, doesn't really like too many cuddles or sleeping on people, happy in his cot and loves routine. Generally a very happy and healthy strapping boy.

However, whenever I tell other mums they react like I've decided to abandon him to the wolves! They are mainly not returning or taking the full year. I just want what's best fr him.

Sorry I haven't read all the thread so apologies if this isn't relevant, but are you doing this for financial reasons?

Have you got a mortgage?

Do you know that a lot of mortgage companies will let you have a mortgage holiday (i.e. pay no mortgage) for maternity?

I only found out my mortgage company did this by accident, and I'm so glad I did as we took the maximum 6 months at once, and simply paid no mortgage for 6 months. It made made a world of difference for us.

They may not actually advertise that they do it - you'll need to ask.

lol...nellie it's teaching. More family friendly than many jobs.

Bit awkward about dh taking days off, dh and I are the only members of school management in the same small school! It's a family affair! We share an office and desk at work, one of us always there with our week planned to avoid each other at work.

hi..I left my first baby at 4.5 months in a nursery 2 days a week to go back to a 3 day a week job (his dad went to a 4 day week). It was all fine, and far easier than when I left my second at 9 mo. He was the pet of the baby room. Just becuase you've had a baby doesn't mean every single thing about you has changed. Don't listen to the other mums, don't google, 2 days a week is not that big a deal, go for it

strawberrycake - we had both DSs in nursery from a similar age, full time, 5 days a week. It was a good solution for us and they enjoyed it.

We have to work at home and so we could ot use a nanny. The nursery was a very good one.

DD went into creche at 3 months old. The mat leave hadn't been extended at that stage (she's only 4 and 8 months now) and I was happy to go back to work myself. I know an awful lot of people who were taking every second of mat leave, unpaid mat leave, annual leave, parental leave etc to stretch their days - but I was happy to take my paid leave and an extra couple of weeks unpaid but that was it. We were able then to settle DD into the creche well, she loved it, and we were still able to take a proper long family holiday later in the year (as normal).

As you would only be doing 2 days at work, that sounds ideal to me. If it's what YOU (and DH/DP) want to do, then that;s the importnat thing - there will always be people who feel they have to comment on what you feel is best for YOUR family.