To be furious that DD was alone when I came home??

[ApocalypseCheese]

DD has asd and a statement which covers her from the moment she leaves home to the moment she gets home. IE she is never unsupervised for her own safety.

Got home from shopping earlier and the poor thing was sat on the sofa panicing, one phonecall to the school reveals there were hardly any kids on the transport bus so dd was home quite a lot earlier than usual.
The front door wasnt locked as i've lost my front door key, dp had left for work earlier and left it open for me/the builders.

Not good enough, these people are trusted to care for my child when i'm not there, heads will roll in the morning

Sorry, someguy - phone auto corrected...

Yes, in the end the ONLY point that is actually relevant is that the escort did not do the job they are contracted to do - which is to hand over AC's DD to her. The rest is all by the by - a bit unfortunate but still not up there with the fact that the handover was not carried out properly, with luckily very few after-effects - although AC's DD being very upset is obviously not good, it could have been worse.

Perfectly reasonable of you to expect your child be dropped off to an adult and not on the door step.

Same as, I would not expect the school to release my child from school unless it was to an adult.

Even if you were running late (which you were not) i wouldnt expect my kid to just be dropped on the door step.

Even if your front door was wide open, you could have just been burgled.

Highly irresponsible of them. A big mistake on their part.

For those who feel it was your fault. I wonder how they would feel if they were running a bit late for school pick up and found their child had been released onto the streets unsupervised.

" I wonder how they would feel if they were running a bit late for school pick up and found their child had been released onto the streets unsupervised."

as I switched from YABU to YANBU once I understood more of what the issue was (ie the duty of care hadn't be carried out etc etc).........please may I answer this one??? pleeeeeeeeeeeease

but you wouldn't be so keen on them releasing your DS2 on his own, would you, tocc?

Tocc can practically throw paperclips through the head mater's office, she lives so close.

fair enough - but even so! Mind you, I think I was walking home from infant's school on my own - but then the let out gate was probably 20 yards from my front gate so no biggie. Nearly all my friends went that way too so no chance I'd get accidentally lost. However - I have no exact recollection, so my Mum was probably standing at the gate to make sure I didn't run past!

ahh - actually colditz - I've moved - to the next street - now takes about 1 minute to walk to the school

and besides - the head mater's office was on the other side from the old house.

but it should also be said, without answering your question directly because I'm a chicken as well as a cowardly custard.

My DS2 has no SN, and is actually infinitely more sensible than DS1 in many respects and I have no concerns that he would disappear off where he shouldn't be/get lost/etc etc.

If he wasn't quite such a sensible lad, or had SN that meant he couldn't be left unsupervised I would obviously feel very differently about it.

That's the crux of it really, isn't it. If you are happy that your DS2 is trustworthy enough to make it home with no incidents or accidents, that is one thing - but if there is a likelihood that something could go wrong because of SN, then you're not going to want your DC left alone.

totally agree.

And although I did start off the thread saying the OP was being UR......I did read more and realise she wasn't BU at all.

I posted early in the thread thats its not unusual for me to leave the door unlocked when I go out

I would never dream of locking it when i am indoors

Its just not an issue where I live

So I understand OPs point of view on that

Oh and OP YADNBU

yabu

YANBU and I can't believe that so many people on here think it's ok for a child to be left at a house with no adult home. I would be really angry.

If I was held up and was late getting to school I would expect my child to be kept there until I arrived.

In this situation I would of expected the transport company to phone OP or do the other drop offs and then come back at the end to see if an adult was home.

What if something had happened to the OP when she was out which prevented her from getting home? the child could of been left alone for hours.

Offs, this isn't about the op leaving her front door unlocked, nor is it about the bus being early. Nor is it about the OP not being there. Because the OPs daughter has an adult carer (whether it be mum/dad/school bus carer) 24 hours a day, so the OP should be able to relax in the knowledge that her daughter would be looked after UNTIL she arrived to take over.

It is about a child, with SN & a statement, who should have 24hr care, being left UNATTENDED by the very person (the carer) who is paid to be responsible for her, when her parents aren't there! Maybe an 11 yr would have coped, but my 6yr old would be terrified!

I say bollox to the fact that 'the door was unlocked therefore the carer might have though someone was home' because the carer should have checked! She should have gone into the house with the child. If the carer had been doing her job properly, she would have seen that AC wasn't home, neither was any other adult, therefore the child shouldn't be left alone.

Sounds like someone was too busy to get home to care!

To all those saying OP is BU, would you be happy if another adult (who you have trusted to care for your 6yr old child) left them on their own? No, I doubt you would.

Well said DNFT!!! Bravo!!

Agree Agree Agree with dfnt

I have found that the people doing disabled transport around here are scarily ignorant about SN issues: no escort on the disabled taxi/bus and the drivers are not told what particular SN a child has.

I spoke to one driver last year (after dd having told me that an autistic child was frequently let out of the taxi to make his own way up the road) and it turned out he had no idea (or claimed not to) that these children had SN at all- he thought they were being taken home by taxi because they were from "problem families" (his words).

And can I just put my hand up again and say, the 'bespoke' bus service is not free. I pay for it ( it isn't cheap either)

And even if it isnt free that isnt the point, the issue is that the I and others should be able to trust people to keep our (extremely vulnerable) children safe in our absence.

YANBU Apocalypse, and I am astounded by some of the posts on this thread.

Your DD should not have been left without the carer checking that you were home.

That is how simple the issue is.

Whether the door was open, or the OP late home, or the bus early. It matters not a bit. The carer should hand over Op's DD to OP. Not just drop at the door.

As to the "entitlement" and "bespoke door to door service" Aloisegg, you should be ashamed of yourself.

Thank you MmeLindt, for what it's worth, my front door is always unlocked during the day when the children are in school, once or twice when dd has dropped off i've popped into the back of the house to get something(usually the fees tbh) and the escort has always shouted through the door, and i've come and collected dd.

I can forgive a lapse of judgement on her part, unfortunately some people on this thread have failed to realise that a momentary lapse of judgement can have devestating consequences for a child in that persons care.

Jasper please explain, not just YABU. So you would be happy for your child with SN to be left on the doorstep without being handed over to you or another responsible adult then . Yes the op knew the drop off time and should have been there in good time but she was not, so until that child is handed over to another adult they are still in the schools duty of care.

Exactly it so happened that the op was a bit late, but what if she had collapsed at home, had an accident when out and was in hospital, or had been burgled hence the door being open. Totally irresponsible imo. My neighbour opposite who has a dd who is autistic with no safety concept whatsoever. She was dropped off by the transport on the street opposite her house and was wandering the streets till someone found her. I was at work but she told me this had happened and was looking for a new transport.

I was still there with 10 minutes to spare, her drop off is any time between 3.20 and 3.30. Pick up is between 7.45am and 7.55 am.