To feel annoyed trees were cut down to print this anti-breastfeeding article

[cherrymama]

In the latest edition of Mother and Baby magazine (I bought it for the free gift) the deputy editor has an article about breastfeeding. In it she says that she "couldn't be fagged" to breastfeed and that breastfeeding her newborn using breasts that had previously been used for sex would feel "creepy". And that even the health benefits of breastfeeding "wouldn't induce her to stick her nipple in her bawling baby's mouth."

I think her attitude is horrible! I understand many people try to breastfeed and don't manage, but to say that it is creepy is another thing.

TSC - that proves the point, though, surely? It is useless to tell the mother with the bleeding nipples at 8 weeks with the fretful baby she should just bf more. It's worse than useless - it purports to be supportive and informative and it just is not. It is counter-productive, and shows a hopeless lack of knowledge about bf.

As I say....useless.

Not sure what your point was about mental health problems - happens to be a special interest of mine.

If someone's breastfeeding experience appears to be directly making them ill/iller, then of course one option might be to switch to ff...I say 'one option' because you can never be dogmatic about this. I have supported many women through mental health problems and breastfeeding, and for some, hanging on to breastfeeding becomes very important for them, even when it appears to be going really badly. Skilled help and counselling helps the mother make the right decision for her, and that may be to mix feed, to switch totally or to continue. There is a lot of evidence to show that good mental health plays an important role in infant well-being, too.

There is research on this, but it's very inconclusive. There are several studies that link continued breastfeeding with better emotional and mental well-being, but it's very hard to control for 'reverse causation' ie they are already in a good place emotionally and are therefore more likely to feel confident and relaxed (which is helpful to bf). So they are breastfeeding because of feeling confident and relaxed, not that breastfeeding causes them to feel confident and relaxed.

well in my case stopping bfeeding made my mental health problems WORSE, my hormone levels which were already crazy went even crazier and i ended up being admitted to the psych unit.

had my mental health problems been properly recognised and treated earlier then i may well have been able to carry on bfeeding.

and i would say that from the mothers i know who have had problems with bfeeding that OVERCOMING them actually helped their mental health.

i am sure my ongoing depression was made worse by the fact that i felt incredible guilt for 'failing' my son and that is NOT the fault of the pro bfeeding peeps, i wholeheartedly support them and i really think that people take some of the breast is best too much to heart.

ultimately breatmilk is BEST for babies, there are always going to be circumstances where mothers cant bfeed but we cannot NOT promote the benefits of bfeeding for fear of upsetting people that dont bfeed.

i am well aware that the way i feel about having to formula feed is MY issue and hearing the benefits of bfeeding does not make me feel any more or less guilty, it is MY issue to deal with and i want the information out in the public so that people get the help they need to bfeed if they wish to do so.

I really don't give a hoot about your eveidence and your studies, because I look at my DS, and my friends and relatives who FFed and they are ALL perfectly healthy! And intelligent. Yet I have BF friends whose children aren't as healthy. It's a case of a certain type of women needing to feel that they are somehow more 'perfect', more accomplished at the whole child rearing thing. Talk to a BF fanatic long enough and and you will, in all probability, be treated to a thesis on EXACTLY the right toys, sleeping arrangements, family set-up to go for too. With NO room for negotiation. It's just the way they are wired up, they absolutely, positively have to be in the right. To not be in the right would suggest that bringing up children isn't some mystical process that you can only succeed at if you are the bestest mum in the whole world.

but thats YOUR experience.

my own formula fed ds is also perfectly healthy and bright and gorgeous

but i still dont dispute the fact that scientific evidence shows that bfeeding is the OPTIMUM for babies in general.
everyones circumstances are different and you have to do what is right for yourself and your family and that goes for feeding/sleeping etc.

and being supportive of bfeeding and getting the information out there does NOT make you some kind of fanatic that believes their way of parenting is the 'right' one.

i thought this thread was debating the rights and wrongs of an article, the article was WRONG in its description of bfeeding as 'creepy' and you have made huge assumptions that all bfeeders are a certain type of person.

desanimaux

You have every right to choose to formula feed and to not explain or justify yourself to anyone. You also have every right to support FF as a choice.

However, dismissing huge bodies of evidence in favour of a few anecdotes is short-sighted, to say the lease. I could just as easily come back at that by saying that my BF children are in perfect health and are very rarely ill and that I know several FF children who catch every cold and infection going. But I choose not to use those stories as my evidence because they are only personal anecdotes and therefore no more valid as proper evidence than your anecdotes.

As for your assumptions about BFing mothers and the 'right toys', 'right sleeping arrangements' etc....sweeping generalisations is all they are. 'Just the way they are wired up'... ludicrous and offensive generalisation.

The article was not wrong in its description of breastfeeding as 'creepy'. That's the writer's perception, her own feelings and she is entitled to articulate them. The title of the magazine is 'Mother and Baby' and I assume that is meant to mean all mothers are welcome to read it, not just the ones who have attained Saintly BF Status.

how many of these b/f 'fanatics' have you met, exactly? Because I've never met a single one. A few people with very strong views on all sorts of different things to do with children - weaning, child development, discipline, whether and how much paid work mothers should do etc. etc. etc. But I've no idea whether any of those people bf or ff.

desanimaux I'm sorry to say that you come across as someone with a chip on her shoulder.

like i said i HAVE formula fed but i still find it offensive, it may be her opinion but that doesnt make it right and i dont think it should have been published in a parenting magazine.

where has it been said that bf mothers are saintly?

i dont like people that criticise formula OR bfeeding BOTH are a choice and need to be supported but the information needs to out there for people to make an informed choice.

her article which gave false impressions about bfeeding ie the saggy boobs etc was not informed and in a parenting magazine the articles should be fact based and informed.

des, the writer is in a privileged position being able to put her views across to tens of thousands of women. And most of them are new mothers who are particularly vulnerable. So she really does have a responsibility to choose her words with care.

I used to edit a different parenting magazine and I would have thought very carefully about this kind of article. Not because it was my job to promote any particular type of feeding, but because my readers deserved to have accurate information about important decisions. So if I were running a piece on personal experiences of infant feeding, I'd probably have had at least two people giving different perspectives, or commissioned a more thoughtful pieced. And given details of helplines and sources of more information at the end.

olifin
hmmm, being made to feel like my mothering instinct was on a par with Waynetta Slob's because a serious health condition meant I had to switch to FF can lead to multiple chippiness!

tsc...I, too, have never met a bf fanatic and some of my friends have fed their babies until well into toddlerhood. I have met many women who never discuss their choice and I've met many FF who feel they have to justify, some ff who tried and failed and felt terribly guilty, some bf/ff who couldn't give a shit and some ff who find the whole bf a bit of a 'tits out for the lads' type thing and never try it.

In this day and age where the type of people that buy these magazines may be surrounded only by ff, I think it's hugely irresponsible to talk about bf and it being creepy.

Honestly if the same article had discussed old men in parks as creepy most posters would send her to hell, but apparently it's alright to talk about creepy bf, she may as well have said mother getting off on baby sucking her nipple......

Des....so you had genuine reasons to give up bf and switch? What's the problem then? You obviously think BF is best.

"the type of people that buy these magazines"!!!!????? There we have it, says it all really.

des it is WRONG that someone made you feel that way, but it is equally wrong that bfeeders are made to feel 'creepy' surely you can see that.

it is wrong to criticise mothers on their parenting choices full stop, we all make choices to suit our own families and we need to support each other in that.

imo this article doesnt support formula or bfeeding, tbh it just shows the writer up as someone who is judgemental and who should have thought more before opening their mouth.

The sort, first time mothers who may have no idea about bfing, never seen it, no experience.

I'm guessing social demographics of the readership would not be highly educated or middle class...and therefore less likely to bf anyway.

It doesn't have to be pretty and fair to be true.

Well, now I think why?Why did I persevere....look at him, he's actually OK, despite what everyone said. Why did I give myself a hard time when it appears not to have made a jot of difference! Yet every day vulnerable women have babies and are STILL made to feel like crap because it's the current trend to BF. So any view that reassures women that it's actually OK to FF, preferable in some cases, is OK by me.

Oh dear, I give up. Snobsnet!

Current trend?

Jesus Christ. Boden is a current trend. BF has been around since we took breath.

Boden and BF tend to go hand in hand in this country. And your views on the "not highly educated or middle class" are patronising in the extreme. Quick! Hide the pro-FF literature in case the proles are influenced by it!