to wonder why people give their child a name then don't use it?

[LordVolAuVent]

A different thread reminded me of this but I've always wondered it.

My name is a "diminuitive", my parents didn't like the long version and knew they would never use it. I think this is quite sensible, but people often don't believe that it's my real name, even call me by the long version and wonder why I don't respond (which occasionally vexes me, but I understand why, because it's fairly unusual it seems).

So, I wonder, why do people name their kids a name like Katherine or Rebecca but never actually use it, always use the diminuitives? I understand if it's a family name or something, but perhaps you don't really like it. I also understand that short names and nicknames do come about (my neighbours for example called their DD Rebecca and I'm pretty sure her school friends call her Becky, but her parents have only ever called her Rebecca - because that's the name they chose and liked) but I also know a lot of people who called their child something and immediately used a diminuitive. Why bother?

Is it that they don't think it's a "real name"?

(not meaning to be arsey, genuinely wondering)

I think some people think they should register the long version of the name in case the child grows up to have some very sensible profession in which a diminutive name might go against them.

My husband's parents never use his first name, he's always been known by his middle name. I've always known him as Mike, but his first name is Paul. He told me when we started dating that his name is Paul and I was quite shocked! Why would you do that?

It's made his life really difficult too, on any thing official he has to give the name Paul despite growing up with the name Mike! His employer knows him as Mike, the inland revenue have Paul etc. When they call out Paul in the dentist, GP etc. he sits there for a few seconds wondering why Paul is getting up...

My parents gave me a name so it couldn't be shortened and then everybody has always just referred to me by my first initial so my name is never used.

DD1 was given a name that was a longer version of the name we wanted because we actually wanted to use the shorter version but wanted to give her options when she was older if she wanted to use another version of that name.

Same with all 3 DC's middle names, never used but there in case they decide they don't like their first name and want to change it.

Using your middle name has the advantage that if someone calls asking for you by your first name you don't want to take the call.

Both my sons have names which traditionally have several diminutives-the eldest is James, the younger is Robert. James is always called Jamie, Robert is always Robert ( or sometimes Bobs but only by me!)The names were chosen so that they would have the option in future to choose their own style, just in case they didn't like the one I decided for them.
I am never known by my "long" name, mainly because no one can ever spell it!

Morloth - Using the example you have given re. RebeccBecky, would the same apply for an Edward/Ted situation?

I only ask as dh and I are having this debate at the moment, I ma 5 months pg and should we have a boy we both love Ted but I am not keen on Edward and want to use Ted on the BC, dh agrees with you re. job application forms when he is older. My view is that Ted could stand alone as a name.

I'm very intrested if naming him Ted could possibly affect him later on.

someone has already said it right on the first page! we gave our DS the full version of his name although we ALWAYS use a diminuative. I don't get people using the NN on the birth certificate tbh, what happens if your Becca grows up and wants a more seriuos grown up name?

DS has 3 names - all the full versions, if he decides he hates his family nn he can pick another diminuative, or if he goes all seriuos in his twenties or older he can go for the full lot.

Given that we call DS sproglet or sunnyjim alot of the time we did kinda need a proper name on the birth cert!

bythemoonlight - how about Theodore instead? with Ted as the nn

oh yes I have a full name plus middle name that allow for plenty of variations, A fact I am devoutly grateful for as I dont' like / suit either of the full versions as I have grown up and I really enoyed choosing my own slightly unusual nn.
However I still use my full name for Cv, introductions etc. It may seem outdates to alot of people but the honest truth is that a Cv for Rebecca has more chance of a second look than one for Becs or even Becky

We have considered Theodore halia but I just can't get my head around naming him something different on the BC to what we will use in everyday life.

I understand using diminuitives such as Becks or Becks, I also understand a pet family nn that develops over time.

But it's a strange idea to me to name him one thing on the BC but call him something different entirely. I can;t get my head around doing this, let alone explaining it to the child as he gets older.

we called our dd2 felicity and my son could only manage to say flissity, so fliss it is!my 11 yr old is called hattie not harriet, and my son is called dexter (which was great until the serial killer series began and chav church called her son dexter!!)

DS is Joseph and I call him Joey a lot. Dh tends to call him Joe. At school he is Joseph though he sometimes says he prefers Joe.

As to why I shorten his name, just because I tend to do it with all my family. Both my sisters had unusual names difficult to shorten but I did nontheless. Neither of my sisters particularly liked the versions I use and I was generally the only one to use them. As someone has said, it is a sibling's role to be annoying sometimes!

I suppose I like the idea that I call close family someone something slightly different to anyone else.

I don't shorten dh's name though and no-one has ever shortened mine.