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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to put ds in nursery

82 replies

WitchyWooWoo · 04/06/2010 14:15

im a sahm, there is no reason for me to -need- to put ds in nursery. However i was considering putting him in for 1 day a week, so he can socialise and i can get a day to really get stuck into housework etc.

part of me thinks this is a great idea, ds will get to play in a safe structured environment, learn and hopefully have fun while i can give the toilet and other places the chemically attention they really need.

he's 21 months old. apart from a toddler group once a week (hes been twice) he's not had any interaction with little uns..

i really don't know if i am bu or not. what to do, what to do.

OP posts:
Clary · 04/06/2010 14:18

If you can afford it and can find a nice one and could use the time to keep yourself sane I really can't see why not.

Just don't use it as a substitute for stuff you would do at home with him (but I am sure you wouldn't)

You can always stop if he or you don't like it.

Mingg · 04/06/2010 14:18

If you can afford it, go for it. Will be nice for him to socialise with other kids

Original poster
WitchyWooWoo · 04/06/2010 14:22

we can afford it, average £25 for a full day.

just means a little bit less chocolate for me per week hehe.

im usually running after him constantly im sure you all agree here that housework and me time certainly take a step back in priorities.

OP posts:
jellybeans · 04/06/2010 14:23

I wouldn't but YANBU it's your choice!

pippop1 · 04/06/2010 14:26

Better to ask other little ones over to play with their Mums, especially in the summer,

Original poster
WitchyWooWoo · 04/06/2010 14:28

i dont have any friends with children, dont know any other mums at all, or children for that matter. as i said in my op, ds has never socialised at all with other children bar 2 sessions at a toddler group

OP posts:
NonnoMum · 04/06/2010 14:29

I would.

Or two mornings.

And then go and get my nails done. Oh, and maybe a bit of hoovering...

sumum · 04/06/2010 14:29

Yes go for it, I sent my little one when he was 18m for two mornings a week even though I was home full time. We went to toddler groups the other days and did home stuff in the afternoon. It worked very well. YANBU.

Clary · 04/06/2010 14:32

I would also give toddler groups etc another try OP.

It's a good way of making pals in an area and often people met in this way can see you through those tricky pre-school years.

They don't have to be amigos for life

Original poster
WitchyWooWoo · 04/06/2010 14:34

see thats what i was thinking. we go to the park/toddler group and have inside days i do a lot of little activities with him at home, and he plays by himself as well. so this would just be one day out of the week...

ive tried meeting other mums from here and shh netmums but those forums seem to be dead. not many toddler groups around either. have a 30 min bus journey to get to the one i go to....

OP posts:
Original poster
WitchyWooWoo · 04/06/2010 14:35

and i live in a city lol

OP posts:
Firawla · 04/06/2010 14:36

I think he needs to socialise so if you dont take him to toddler groups it may be a good idea, they usually love to be around other children @ that age. I would personally just use the toddler groups though, but then you dont get to do your cleaning..so that's the downside. 1 day a week isn't much so try it and see if he likes it, if not then take him out. I dont see how that is BU

TaurielTest · 04/06/2010 14:36

If it's about the housework, why not spend the £25 on a cleaner instead? But if it's more about the me time - and that's NBU at all - then why not give it a try and see how he likes it...

nagoo · 04/06/2010 14:37

Prob a couple of mornings would be better as mine found it hard to settle 1 day per week, and it can be a long day?

Clary · 04/06/2010 14:37

Shame there are no groups nearer - I also find toddler groupiedom makes for some familiar faces at school gate in a few years which is always nice.

Not if group is 30 mins bus ride away tho! Is there no music time class or NCT group or anything? There are loads in my area but then it is a bit yummy mummy ish.

LadyintheRadiator · 04/06/2010 14:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

diamondsandtiaras · 04/06/2010 14:42

no YANBU. I am a sahm with a 2.3 year old and a 16 wk old. DD1 has had 2 mornings with a childminder since I got pregnant with DD2. She gets time to socialise with other children and gets used to being left (we have no relatives nearby who can babysit etc) and I now get 2 mornings quality time with DD2. We are switching from CM to nursery from September because we now feel she would benefit more from a larger group etc etc.

Original poster
WitchyWooWoo · 04/06/2010 14:43

maybe, was considering just a morning to do some shopping (food) and have a cuppa somewhere lol.

music time etc is hell for us as ds very active (polite term for wont sit still for a bloody minute)

dh thinks its a good idea, just want need some other opinions as i suppose i feel cruel even considering this.

cleaner would be fab but not for us, too hectic a household (and thats with only 1 dc)

ive tried some toddler groups before but get pretty much ignored and catsbum faces everytime i walk through the door. i dont like them, but taking ds to them for his sake iykwim

OP posts:
NonnoMum · 04/06/2010 14:44

And if your Dc goes to an Ofsted-registered nursery rather than a playgroup, you won't have to do all that sitting around chatting to the other mums...

WickedWitchSouthWest · 04/06/2010 14:46

YANBU, I did the same thing with my dd. She had a day in nursery 8:30 - 5 once a week which gave me chance to blast through the housework / gardening / decorating or whatever needed to be done and she absolutely thrived. Then we had the rest of the week together to do fun mummy & child stuff without me stressing about when the ironing might get done

LadyintheRadiator · 04/06/2010 14:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WickedWitchSouthWest · 04/06/2010 14:49

I think it depends on the child as to the sessions they do. My dd really didn't get on with 2 mornings at nursery and would be upset at having to go home at lunchtime and leave her friends! The nursery let me trial a full day with her so she had lunch and afternoon snack and it worked brilliantly. She then asked if she could have tea there too so that's how she ended up staying until 5pm!

Original poster
WitchyWooWoo · 04/06/2010 14:50

i finally found one that suits us perfectly (he gets to run around and play continuously) and that seems to be the only one of that kind around. thats a thurs morning,then we go to his grandparents and he can play in the garden the rest of the day (we live in a flat, no garden) they run 2 sessions a week, but the other one is full.

OP posts:
sorebore · 04/06/2010 14:51

it might also prepare him a little bit for nursery/school when he is older - getting him used to being away from you for a short period, maybe making the transition later on a little easier.

bodenbore · 04/06/2010 14:51

Gosh I would do it you can trial it and see how you go.

I have a day to myself to do chores and stay sane and get hair cuts and so on.

My much younger baby seems very happy too.

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