to never let BIL near my children ever again

[JackBauer]

There is a bit of a backstory so will keep it brief. Bil is 25, just moved out from il's house inwith his gf. He has history for being very selfish/self centred. We know that he has been injectng himself with testosterone for 'muscle build' He knew that now he has moved out dd's (4.3 and 2.7) would be sleeping in his room + that we were coming up this weekend. He didn't clean out his room at all.
Dh got here a day before dd's and i and filled 6 binbags with stuff from his room including
Lock knives
A loaded bb gun
Porn mags
Empty viagra blister packs
And
6 unused hypodermic needles.

Obviously i do not think iabu but we can't tell mil + fil (she is incapacitated after a stroke + fil is 73 + got enough on his plate) so wtf do we do?

Posting on phone from mates house so might not be able to come back but would welcome any comments as i think showing him other parents reactions might help him see we are nit 'being fucking twats' as i know that's what he will say.

Dear Jacks BIL you are the fucking twat. Grow up.

No, he sounds like a selfish, self-obsessed idiot who shouldn't be allowed within 100 yards of anyone's children, let alone yours. You are so not being unreasonable.

Omfg, yanbu !!

Tosser and a slob - wouldn't want him anywhere near my kids

That's horrific. YA absolutely NBU.

Presumably his blase reactions to things like knives and needles are caused by injecting testosterone, so I doubt anything we have to say will have an effect.

YANBU

i wonder if i have the holy grail of aibu?!

Its like living in a fucking jeremy kyle special!

(coco, can't grt on ana thread as too big for phonr but am zoning like a goodun!)

i wonder if i have the holy grail of aibu?!

Its like living in a fucking jeremy kyle special!

(coco, can't grt on ana thread as too big for phonr but am zoning like a goodun!)

i like that mds! But tbh i'd rather not think about his gonads (ew)

E's a wanker, dump the bin bags outside his new place.

Ha! Love that idea jux with a note saying 'You forgot these'

another yanbu here. Your bil, for example, is a twat!

In fact if you ever do let yr dc anywhere near him, i'll come down and slap you myself!

that was a joke, i know you have weapons!

yanbu

No way are you being unreasonable. Your kids are the most important thing in your life and you have a right to protect them.

thanks guys. We knew wwnbu (dh is reading too) but it's nice to have back up whenwe really can't involve parents, iyswim.

Am so angry right now wth him, what if dhhadnt checked?! Fucking cunt. How fucking dare he?
And who did he think ws gointg to tidy his room with mil wheelchair bound + fil so preoccupied? The frickng cleaning fairy?
Grrr.

Wow what an utter prat! Anyone who though so little of children that they would leave such things lying around really isn't worth bothering with IMO. Certainly not someone I'd choose to have around my children.

Clearly shows that he really doesn't give a toss about anyone but himself.

YANBU, keep well away from him!

Just say to him, i hope your girlfriend doesnt ant kids, because with the stuff your injection you may aswell cut your balls off with a kitchen knife!

want & injectING

Selfish. Self centred.

re the needles - is he diabetic or something? Or is it illegal substances? Because if it's the latter, then you'd be wasting your breath. Junkies normally don't care about anything but their next fix. Their world is themselves and their need. It's the nature of the beast.

Hecate, we're pretty sure that they are the needles he uses to inject testosterone. As far as we can tell he has no idea we are not talking/visiting so now we have 2 choices
We say nothing and just don't go round/make excuses. This way mil + fil are kept out of it, which is very important as they really can't take too much stress. But he gets away with it, again.
OR we tell him exactly what we think and why. He will most likely bitch to mil, + she will insist on knowing why...

of yes. reading your op properly I see that

Testosterone turns you into a monster, doesn't it?

tbh, I think your best bet would be to have nothing to do with him.

does he want to make sure that his parents know nothing too? Because you could make it plain to him that any bother from him and you will make sure his parents are 100% aware of the facts.

• ok, it's a bluff, but if you are convincing enough you could keep him away.

how utterly, utterly pathetic, self absorbed and selfish is he?

presumably, he needs the viagra as he is unable to get /sustain an erection due to steroid abuse ? wonder how long the GF will last

6 bin bags of rubbish is disgraceful

i would certainly be considering barring him from setting foot in the house again ever, or at least utnil he gets help for his problmes

If he's been injecting testosterone and taking viagra I personally wouldn't want to antagonise him - he might combust....! Urrgh - porn and sexual aggression. Just the thought of it makes me come over all Andrea Dworkin.