Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be gobsmacked at his pocketmoney??

180 replies

VirtualPA · 16/05/2010 17:14

My little brother (big age gap) is 16.

DH and I went to visit the family this weekend and it came up in conversation that he gets £50 a month pocket money. Half in a DD and half in cash.

I asked what he does for his money and apparently he washes the car every now and then.

I mean..... WOW! Thats a lot of money.

My DD will have to do set chores each day (such as loading the dishwasher) for her pocket money.

Or am I being unreasonable and this is the going rate now.

OP posts:
LadyOfTheFlowers · 16/05/2010 17:15

I bloody well hope this is not the going rate as I have just had no.4!

Iused to get £2 a week!!

MrsHarkness · 16/05/2010 17:17

My daughter gets £40 plus her phone contract paid every month from us and she also gets £40 a month from her gran, she will be 13 this year and that is a similar amount to what her friends get.

MrsHarkness · 16/05/2010 17:18

Should add that out of that she has to buy all her fancy toileteries and hair dyes and any extra clothes she wants.

Original poster
VirtualPA · 16/05/2010 17:19

It's such a lot of money! I dont have that much to spend on myself.

I mean what can a 16 year old do?? Clothes, mcdonalds, cinema?

OP posts:
RealityLovesYou · 16/05/2010 17:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
VirtualPA · 16/05/2010 17:21

I certainly do not begrudge him the money, he is my brother.
But I am shocked!

OP posts:
kolacubes · 16/05/2010 17:22

When I was at school - and still seems to be the case now for my teenager's friends there were 2 camps.

There are/were the teenagers who got large allowances, (£50+) a month, but were expected to fund themselves with this, i.e. buy non essential (not school uniform) clothes, pay for cinema/bowling/macdonalds etc.

And the other teenagers who get under £10 a month but when they go out for example to the cinema, the parents give money for the ticket, and will buy all clothes etc.

sarah293 · 16/05/2010 17:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
VirtualPA · 16/05/2010 17:26

My DP do give him bits of money as well if he is going out, and they take him too and from places, he very very rarely gets a bus.

OP posts:
GerbilMeasles · 16/05/2010 17:39

DS is 15, 16 in September. I used to do the small amount of pocket money, pay for all his extras routine, but it just meant that he had no concept of the value of money - generally he asked, and he got. It was getting to the point where he'd casually ask for £20 or £30 to go out for the day, a couple of times a week.

We had a chat about it, and now he gets £100 per month as an allowance. Everything comes from this except school uniform and food (as in school dinners/breakfast - I don't make him buy his own food otherwise). He's expected to do the odd chores for it, but I have no moral high ground on that point, as I do sod all around the house and we live in a pigsty. He makes me cups of tea, cooks dinner for us on occasion, does all the technical geeky things I can't do myself (he did something clever yesterday so I could watch Ashes to Ashes on the telly, rather than on the computer - had missed it on Friday - and upgraded my computer for me). He gets extra for good reports from school and decent exam results, or from extra jobs we negotiate. He gets money knocked off for poor behaviour - mostly general teenage arsiness.

He's being assessed for ASD, and I think that it helps him knowing what money he is entitled to in a month, and knowing that specific types of behaviour have a measurable value. Anyway, works for us, although it seems an enormous amount of money - I used to get 20p a week (though this is 35 years ago) until I got a Saturday job (then my little sister got my 20p on top of hers - she still owes me for that)

muggglewump · 16/05/2010 17:42

I got £20 a week when I was 18, 14 years ago and it didn't go far then, though I will admit I was spoiled and got everything I wanted extras on top of that.

I don't think £50 a month is an unreasonable amount, and no, I don't have that to spend on myself a month either, wish I did, but I can't see a problem giving that to a teen.

Am I just naive?

FakePlasticTrees · 16/05/2010 17:42

erm, back when I was 16 (a very long time ago) I got a fiver a week. What with the massive passage of time, I'd say a tenner a week is about right. (my parents were both teachers pre-retirement so not exactly minted)

mumblechum · 16/05/2010 17:44

DS is also going to be 16 in Sept and gets £35 from me, £35 from his gran and tops it up with v lucrative babysitting, usually £40 for 2 evenings.

He pays for games, the odd t shirt (though I buy most of his clothes - he's not really bothered so don't go mad), he's also saving his spending money as he's going to the States with a friend in August so needs about £250 in his pocket for that.

Original poster
VirtualPA · 16/05/2010 17:45

Looks like im just out of touch

OP posts:
BritFish · 16/05/2010 17:51

i gave my two £10 a month age 10-13 [i would pay for cinema trips and clothes. but clothes we agreed on that they needed, not just crap they wanted!]

13+ they had £30 a month, and were mostly expected to pay for cinema trips, etc themselves [although i would buy friends bdays presents, school stuff etc]
i would expect them to have tidy bedrooms.

im lucky in that my two knew early on that if they wanted something, they had to save or wait for birthdays/christmas/mum feeling extremely generous.

and when they were 16 they got a job and started paying me rent, a bit of which is used towards their keep [namely my sons half hour long showers] and a bit of which is saved in a special occassion/emergency account, which they dont know about.

i do not get parents who give teenagers who are old enough to have jobs cash. unless there is a specific reason why your child cannot have a job, i dont understand why you should shell out for their new clothes/alcohol/parties etc?
[bitter, having just found out my second cousin's daughter [who is 17] gets £100 a month. lucky girl]

but now my DD is at uni i pay for her train tickets home, and if she was ever in genuine need [thats not: "ive spent all my money on alcohol and all i have left is noodles"] there is money there for her, same goes for my son if he goes to uni.

VirtualPA is there any reason your bro cannot get a saturday job?

oldandgreynow · 16/05/2010 17:51

I don't think that is a huge amount for a 16 yo

halfawake · 16/05/2010 17:54

£50 a month is definitely not over the top IMO - I would have said it's average or even below average.

At that age I got £80 a month (and also had 2 part time jobs to save for uni)

If they can afford to give it and he does some odd jobs for it then I think it's absolutely fine

Original poster
VirtualPA · 16/05/2010 17:55

BritFish - he is on study leave for his GCSE's.

I did have a job at 16 though so IKWYM

OP posts:
Tryharder · 16/05/2010 17:57

I never got pocket money as a child (I'm 38 now). Never once (although obviously, my parents bought me clothes and other essentials). I had a job instead. Teenagers don't seem to have jobs now - it's not good for them.

I did 3 paper rounds from the age of 11, then worked in a local shop from 13, then washed up in various restaurants, waitressed, cleaned, you name it I've done it. I can't believe spoiled teenagers sit on their arses getting nearly £100 a month. Jesus.

islandofsodor · 16/05/2010 18:01

My 8 year old gets around £30 (she gets her pocket money weekly so the actual monthly amount depends on whether it is a 4 or 5 week month.

However by the time she has payed for her ballet lessons at £6 per week plus any costumes for shows and other extras there is not much left!

twolittlemonkeys · 16/05/2010 18:01

I only got £2 a week pocket money until I was old enough to get a job (ie 16) then pocket money stopped. Was still expected to help out at home. Am 29 now, so not that long ago...

twolittlemonkeys · 16/05/2010 18:04

oh and I had to pay for cinema, clothes etc out of that. I thought it was awful at the time but now I'm glad I don't just waste money like many of my friends have got used to doing.

FranSanDisco · 16/05/2010 18:04

In my first full-time job as a junior secretary I earned £50 per week. I am either really old or was being ripped off

SlartyBartFast · 16/05/2010 18:06

my ds gets 10 a month from me. he is 15, yes i am tight, but we are skint. i pay his gym membership, top up his phone and buy his toiletries, give him money for clothes, occasionally.
he has a paper round and has now got another job.

bronze · 16/05/2010 18:06

I have to admit I am in complete and utter shock