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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To find this a bit out of order?

105 replies

maqsv · 19/03/2010 16:43

From a family member:

Dearest Friends and Family,

As you may know, G and I are about 3-6 weeks away from welcoming a new family member into our homes. We have had many offers to visit and help out and we appreciate that dearly; we will need all the help we can get! Also, I know many of you will want to just visit and see the new baby. G and I want to gently explain our needs so you understand. First, please understand our living situation; we live in a 2 bedroom, one bath home. Our home is also our office; we both work at home and currently work up to 40 hours a week and will need time away from guests to remain focused. Therefore, we will not be able to have visitors stay in our home for the first 3-6 months. However, we want each of you to feel welcome to visit S and meet the new family member so we have created clear roles we are comfortable with for you to freely fit yourself into:

  1. Visitors
These guests should mostly be interested in visiting the new baby and family and will not do a bunch of house work for the us. Please stay in a local hotel you are comfortable with. We are happy to give you a few local suggestions or please check with expedia.com and stay near __ if you want to be close by our home. Our daily home visiting hours will be 12pm-5pm.
  1. House Guests
These guests should be visiting in the first 3 months and their main concern should be on maintaining the flow of our home as it was prior to baby chaos. For example meal planning, grocery shopping, meal preparation, laundry, cleaning, dishes, small office tasks for G_, doggie walks, doggie feeding, cleaning up poo, running earns for G_ and baby and lastly there may be some baby time while mommy sleeps- feeding, changing, soothing, etc. These guests will need to stay in our home, sleep in the guest room/office and commit to being available for a minimum of 3 days at a time. Please we can only have one house guest at a time; we may be able to accommodate for a husband/wife team if both members of the party are willing to be active helpers and we have time to create sleeping arrangements. We have many weeks open in May and June for these dear family members. We would like ample time to plan, so if you are interested, please contact M__ or G_ right away.

We sincerely look forward to seeing you and hold no judgment at all whether you choose to be a ?visitor? or a ?house guest?.

Lots of Love,

M, G_ and new baby

Basic Needs of Mommy and Daddy while they learn how to parent:
? Meal planning
? grocery shopping
? meal preparation
? Laundry
? cleaning
? dishes
? General household organization
? Collect the mail, open it, set aside bills for M to pay, file invoices/paperwork
? Small office tasks for G like scanning, printing, filing
? Doggie stuff: daily walks, once a day feeding, clean up poop regularly, give lots of love- this may be hard on him
? Run earns for G and baby
? Calm baby while mommy sleeps- feeding, changing, soothing, etc.

OP posts:
SPBInDisguise · 19/03/2010 16:45

right sentiment, bit over the top imo

cornsilk · 19/03/2010 16:45

really??

Shaz10 · 19/03/2010 16:46

Someone's had a bad experience in the past it seems!

Rosa · 19/03/2010 16:46
Hmm
BrahmsThirdRacket · 19/03/2010 16:47

fucking mental

GibbonInARibbon · 19/03/2010 16:47
Hmm
peggotty · 19/03/2010 16:47

Yes, it's a bit OTT to say the least, but part of me admires them . Are they a bit anal generally?

staranise · 19/03/2010 16:48

From a close family member?

I would love to see the reactions of my family if I circulated this

Molesworth · 19/03/2010 16:49

what BrahmsThirdRacket said

I wonder how many visitors they will actually get?

DinahRod · 19/03/2010 16:49

{grin]

This is the sort of email that does the rounds!

sarah293 · 19/03/2010 16:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

thedollshouse · 19/03/2010 16:50

I find it very confusing.

They don't really want visitors but if you choose to stay anyway you must help with housework etc. Is that what they are saying?

We too live in a 2 bedroomed 1 bathroomed house and I wouldn't even entertain the idea of having any overnight visitors but thankfully none of our family would impose themselves on us anyway.

piprabbit · 19/03/2010 16:50

I suspect that they will not need to worry too much about coping with visitors and guests as I, for one, would not be visiting at all.

It reads like a contract of employment - where you're only payment may be a little baby time while mommy sleeps (i.e. hands off the baby if mommy is awake).

Is there such a thing as a Momzilla?

Limara · 19/03/2010 16:50

This for real lol!! Fair play to her, she knows what she wants eh!

Seriously, though, I think she'll need all the support she can get when the baby arrives because with that tight a ship so to speak, it will all unravell......

lucky1979 · 19/03/2010 16:51

"will not do a bunch of house work for the us."

What on earth does that mean?
I had some sympathy with them until they started detailing tasks for their servants house guests.

Fel1x · 19/03/2010 16:51

I'm generally a very helpful person when someone has a new baby and quite happy to cook/clean etc, but if I received this letter off a family or friend I'd be shit scared to go anywhere near them!!! NO ONE will be up to their standards I bet

GypsyMoth · 19/03/2010 16:51

Unreal!!!

OrmRenewed · 19/03/2010 16:51

Ohhhhh that sort of house-guest What rates do they pay?

AbsOfCroissant · 19/03/2010 16:51

I suppose it does make sense, but a bit OTT. And a bit detailed.

scaryteacher · 19/03/2010 16:51

double

Why not just pay for staff instead of using family/friends for the purpose? Too precious for words.

Hullygully · 19/03/2010 16:52

oh dear lord

PuppyMonkey · 19/03/2010 16:52

This is fantastic. It is a joke isn't it?????

WingedVictory · 19/03/2010 16:52

The thing to visitors is all right, but the family list is rather off-putting. Especially the business admin which goes with it.

It depends what your relationship with these people is like, of course, but they sound a bit high-maintenance, and it might be an idea for someone in the family to talk them down from some of the more extravagant of these demands (especially the work-related ones).

That's the most neutral response I can make on this!

AbsOfCroissant · 19/03/2010 16:53

Where does one find a houseguest who's willing to do all that housework I wonder? And may I have one please?

MrsC2010 · 19/03/2010 16:53

Hahaha, I might steal that and send it to the family...see what reactions I get.

I suspect it is a hoax though, I saw a similar toned letter puporting to be from a bride to her bridesmaids while I was planning the wedding.

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