Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

ridiculous argument over dinner

107 replies

thehillsarealive · 08/03/2010 19:23

ok, DH just came in from work asked what was for dinner, I said that there was soup (root vegetable & thyme) with wholegrain bread or if he didnt fancy that there was yesterdays roast left over in the fridge which i would do him with veg, fresh mash and fresh yorkie puds. He just had a big strop - and has actually fucked off to the supermarket to get himself something else.

I didnt think he would want the soup - as "it isnt enough for him after work" - he doesnt do manual labour btw, he works in the city,probably hasnt had lunch but that isnt my problem... Anyway, he doesnt want the same food as yesterday...

so AIBU not to run a fucking hotel with full A la Carte menu of an evening or should i have transformed yesterdays pork into stroganoff like i was going to (he didnt know this) but i ran out of time, had to take DD to doctors, both DC to after school activities, dog to vets and home to make dinner.

sorry for mega long post, i am totally peed off.

OP posts:
Morloth · 08/03/2010 19:26

You get what you get here.

DH would have scoffed soup and leftovers and been happy. Because if he had said anything other than "Thanks Love", he wouldn't have been fed for a week.

Still he has fucked off to the supermarket and now you don't have to bother feeding him at all. No real downside from your point of view.

Doodlez · 08/03/2010 19:26

Tell him it's his turn to shop and cook this week.

luciemule · 08/03/2010 19:27

I had to check I hadn't written this post as my DH does exactly the same thing - ungrateful git. It would have been bad enough for you if he's done that on a normal day but having taken your DD to the GP and dog to vet, warrants the reply of "whatever you dish up is cool with me honey, would you like me to make you a cuppa?" type thing.
Let's hope he thinks about it and gets you a chocolate treat from supermarket!

ScreaminEagle · 08/03/2010 19:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

luciemule · 08/03/2010 19:34

A few weeks back, as I was getting sick of the kids not eating any meals I cooked and the bin getting the majority, I asked DH to list the meals he loves (the kids were listening. He said "well, I don't really like your roasts and I'm not keen on spag bol or any mince beef dishes. I was fuming!!! We've been having quite a lot of shepherds pie and spag bol recently

IwishIwasmoreorganised · 08/03/2010 19:35

The only person who's being unreasonable here is your DH.

He could have had soup and the pork if he was that hungry. If he doesn't want to eat the same meal on 2 consecutive days then that really is his problem.

I'm that he would bother to go to the supermarket when there is obviously plenty of good food at home ready for him.
Bet he comes back with some ready meal or other that won't fill him up half as well as proper meat and veg.

heQet · 08/03/2010 19:37

I'd be feeding him his meat and veg if he'd been so bloody rude to me!

said · 08/03/2010 19:37

Bet he comes back with just enough for his immediate needs. Bet you he doesn't also think "Hmm, think we've run out of washing powder, better rush and get some"

Original poster
thehillsarealive · 08/03/2010 19:38

thanks ladies, I am a good cook (if i say so myself) and usually have a dinner ready or on the go for him - or plated up as most times he isnt home until 8-10pm but today, I havent and feel like 'the little woman' at his attitude.

Could be that as he has been up at his parents and not eaten proper food (takeaway central) for 4 days he has forgotten how to behave!

might show him this thread...

OP posts:
Morloth · 08/03/2010 19:38

Where the hell do these guys get the idea that this is acceptable behaviour? You are all clearly much nicer wives than I am!

burnthedummy · 08/03/2010 19:40

my DP is collecting a takeaway on the way home because I couldn't be bothered didn't have time to make anything tonight. If I had however gone to the effort to make something he would eat it and be grateful!

Rosa · 08/03/2010 19:41

Next time give him the shopping list and ask him to pick up the shopping whilst he is there....Oh and on the way back could he pop to the all night chemist and get the dds meds and when he comes back could he take the dog out for a wee. Oh and whilst he is putting the shopping away could he just pop the dcs school things in the bags for the morning........Silly man. My dh would as said not get fed for a week. I do ask if there is something he wants and I will try to include it in the next weeks menu . A few days at home during the week makes him see what I do with my time and he never complains ( any more!)

thesecondcoming · 08/03/2010 20:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mowcop · 08/03/2010 20:24

I make soup on a Tuesday as I take DD1 to dancing and it is just within DH's capability to reheat it for him and the younger 2. However, I do have to make a pudding eg apple crumble otherwise it doesn't constitute a meal too him.

I don't think they realise how much time it takes to prepare and cook meals, let alone wash the mountains of dishes that go with it!

ImSoNotTelling · 08/03/2010 20:25

Bloody hell.

Leftover roast is my fave - cold meat with leftover fried sliced roast pots (which lets face it are chips) and salad, or mash and veg.

Ergo your DH is a twat and you can give him this from me

Gawd DH gets what he's given and thanks me profusely.

mistletoekisses · 08/03/2010 20:26

YANBU.

Your DH was totally out of order. Both options were perfectly spot on for supper.

If my DH had done that, I would've gone on a fairly lengthy strike until a grovelling apology was proffered.

MmeLindt · 08/03/2010 20:28

Even if he had not wanted leftovers, he could have said that he fancied something else and he would nip to the supermarket / local chippy / chinese restaurant for a takeaway. And a bottle of wine for you, since you have had a hard day.

Ungrateful beggar.

Undercovamutha · 08/03/2010 20:35

I'm sure some men just have a problem with soup! My DH is always a bit if we have soup for tea. He doesn't really say anything, but makes a point of raiding the fridge for things to 'go with it'. And if it is leek and potato soup, I have heard him mutter about there being no meat. However he daren't say anything out loud as he knows he would be wearing the soup if he did!

Tanga · 08/03/2010 20:41

YANBU. Absolutely. I love cooking for DH because whatever is put on his plate (however flabby and uninspiring), he always says 'smashing' and gives a very genuine thanks. This may be something to do with his diet prior to our getting together, which was entirely Pot Noodles.

bickie · 08/03/2010 20:44

OMG - YANBU - at what point did you agree to be slave and short order cook? I would hit the roof if my DH did that. I really worry that some men see their wives as their servant - not their partner. I overheard two little boys talking about how they needed 'some wives' to do all the cooking and cleaning that they didn't want to do when they grow up - nice future for some poor little girl studying hard right now!

bellavita · 08/03/2010 20:46

Blimey, my DH and children get what they get and that is that. It is more than their lives are worth to question any thing I put in front of them.

chandellina · 08/03/2010 20:50

YANBU. we have soup at least twice a week all year round and fortunately DH loves it. Soup is a great meal and should fill anyone up with a bit of bread.

KurriKurri · 08/03/2010 20:52

How rude! My DH is like Tanga's cheerfully eats whatever he is given. What does he think you should do with left over roast apart from eat it the next day? Throw it away?

thesecondcoming · 08/03/2010 20:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

junglist1 · 08/03/2010 20:58

He doesn't have manners. If he went to a dinner party and didn't fancy it would he have the same attitude? He should show some respect, if he didn't want soup he should have taken the alternative