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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want to get rid of our dog who has bitten our son?

169 replies

paulaplumpbottom · 06/03/2010 19:46

We have a 5 year old springer spaniel. He has always been the most gentle dog you can imagine and we all adore him. He has always been especially good with children and he has never shown any signs of aggression.

On Wed night my 20 month old son and I were sitting on the floor with the dog. My son was patting him very lightly on the head. This has been a very common occurance and our dog has always been very happy and relaxed before. My dog suddenly turned and aggressivly bit my son on the forhead. My son was fine and it did not break the skin.He did cry but was fine a minute later and I spoke to a doctor who said he would be fine. I then called my MIL who came and got my dog.

My husband was away on business and was not there to witness the attack. When I described the situation to him he said that I must be mistaken and that our dog was so placid that he would never do anything aggressive.This was also my MIL's reaction. I have been very furious because I feel that what I saw was a very aggressive attack and I am hurt that my judgement is being called into question. I no longer want the dog around the children. I have told my husband that he is never to be around our children again and that I want no legal responsibilty for him. My husband wants him back home but kept outside. My children and their friends play outside and I feel that it would be impossible to ensure that he would never come into unsupervised contact with him.
My Dh and MIL think i am being completely unreasonable. Am I?

OP posts:
Original poster
paulaplumpbottom · 06/03/2010 20:51

We had the dog before my DS but we had my DD at the time so he was not in any way a child substitute. Until Wednesday I had never once thought of getting rid of him.

OP posts:
darkandstormy · 06/03/2010 20:52

My son broke the skin on my daughters arm really big nipper.I just think give this dog a chance,it all sounds very out of character.No way should he be put to sleep.Re homed perhaps yes .Op have you watched any of the dog whisperer shows, he is like super nanny of the dog world and can sort a lot of these issues.not sure if he is on dvd.

ilovesprouts · 06/03/2010 20:53

ceaser milan

rainbowinthesky · 06/03/2010 20:54

No he is not like supernanny of the dog world. THere has been a lot of criticism of his methods in teh dog world. I wouldnt be looking to get a dvd to deal with a dog who has nipped my chidl on the face.

darkandstormy · 06/03/2010 20:57

remember ilove sprouts we are talking about a springer spaniel dog here and not a piece of disposable trash. A dog who has acted out of character therefore probably unwell. and needs to be checked by a vet.

darkandstormy · 06/03/2010 21:01

How often does he get walked daily each day?

magnolia74 · 06/03/2010 21:02

ceaser milan is a bloody idiot who's theory's are out dated. Please don't take advise from a tv programme

Vets is the 1st place to go, your dog may be unwell and therefor irritable and less tolerent. A thorough check over and / or rehoming if thats what you really want but please go through a specific breed rescue. One in England may have contacts for N I

choufleur · 06/03/2010 21:03

Puppies bite, DAS, and they should be taught not to. that would be a reasonable analogy to a toddler. a 5 year old dog shouldn't bite - end of. that's like saying teenagers may bite if they snap.

Original poster
paulaplumpbottom · 06/03/2010 21:03

He has the run of the fields so doesn't get walked as such. We take him into the mountains or to the beach when we go.

OP posts:
Original poster
paulaplumpbottom · 06/03/2010 21:04

I usually go out and throw a ball for him quite a bit

OP posts:
magnolia74 · 06/03/2010 21:05

No a 5yr old dog shouldn't bite but this dog did not bite
He snapped which is a warning and very much like me or you pushing someone away if they hurt us!
If he has never been like this before I really do think maybe he is unwell even if its not obvious.

rainbowinthesky · 06/03/2010 21:07

I have the answer - I'll swap places with your dog. I would love to live next to fields in a big house with mountains and a beach near by.

ilovesprouts · 06/03/2010 21:11

das it was my opinion ,i have a dog and if she ever nipped my ds2 or bit him off it would go asap,!! really some posters on here !

muppetgirl · 06/03/2010 21:12

We had our dog from a puppy and we only had ds 1. Since then we have had ds 2 + 3.

Our dog had always been absolutely fine with ds 1 and ds 2 but when ds 2 started to walk he started baring his teeth which then went into growling when ds 2 came into the study where his bed was. Ds 3 was born and he ignored him. Ds 2 developed a fear of our dog and the dog picked up on this and strted to become more aggressive. I became worried as our house is on 3 levels and the living room is on the secod floor and I could never leave ds 2 in the same room as our dog as I felt I couldn't trust him. I started keeping our dog away from the children especially since ds 3 was born. This obviously made him worse so we looked into re-homing him. After many weeks of searching he has gone to live with a retired lady who has no children who is able to give him the time I did intially, but having each subsequent ds made that time shorter and shorter and I felt he was unhappy and I wasn't being the owner I wanted to be. He has been there a month and now has a playmate, 2 walks a day and as many tennis balls to throw as he likes.

I lost confidence in my dog and he knew it. He also knew that ds 2 was frightened of him and took advantage of this. Dh was not supportive at first (this has been an on going situation for 6 months) but eventually saw what was happening. Our dog was nealry 4 and has a long life ahead of him and we felt that to re-home him now would be, in the long run, the fairest and kindest thing to do.

I miss him terribly but know that he is having a great time -they have sent daily/weekly updates and photos- so for us, it was the best thing.

darkandstormy · 06/03/2010 21:14

rainbow they are animals and people are animals , it is all about understanding behaviour, and getting to the root of a problem.This dog could have something as simple as a tick in his ear.Paula please take him to the vet for a check.

muppetgirl · 06/03/2010 21:15

I do agree he could be ill though and perhaps a vet should be your first point of call. We did see a vet but all was well. (We also saw a behaviourist and emplyed dog walkers to make sure he got regular walks)

Mylittlebubble · 06/03/2010 21:16

Rainbowinthesky - I didn't know that the whole pack theory was outdated or that Ceaser Millan was soo wrong? The pack thoery is surely a natural instinct for dogs and we should take note of this. I know it certainly helps with our dog.

darkandstormy · 06/03/2010 21:17

ilove sprouts, I am also entitled to my opinion.

Original poster
paulaplumpbottom · 06/03/2010 21:18

I am going to take him to the vet on Monday. My DH was away on business so I had to wait till he got here.

I would love that sort of outcome Muppetgirl.

OP posts:
darkandstormy · 06/03/2010 21:18

rainbow I was thinking the same thing, although I would prefer a more of a mediterranean climate.

Original poster
paulaplumpbottom · 06/03/2010 21:22

Well the Mountains while I can see them from here are still thirty minutes away. This part of Northern Ireland is lovely.

OP posts:
fifitot · 06/03/2010 21:23

Try and get him rehomed. We had a springer and it once bit me when I was a kid on the leg. Never did it again but I can understand if you don't want to take the chance.

However don't put him down. That would be really sad. He is probably not an aggressive dog, springers usually aren't, and it may just be a one off. However I can understand why you might not want to take the chance on him.

Someone has posted the English Springer link - go via them.

darkandstormy · 06/03/2010 21:25

got to say agree with fifitot just get him checked in the meantime hope you find him somewhere nice I am sure they will.

EcoMouse · 06/03/2010 21:33

Rehome it. How worrying!

We had a springer cross, collie cross, collie, jack russels x4, and a lab cross when I was at home. We could rough and tumble with them and they didn't ever show aggression.

After we left, my mum had a golden retriever with a dodgy personality so he wasn't allowed to play with children ever.

It's largely down to the dog's personality, IME. If it's done it once, it could do it again and it just isn't worth the risk.

zazen · 06/03/2010 21:35

When I described the situation to him he said that I must be mistaken and that our dog was so placid that he would never do anything aggressive.This was also my MIL's reaction. I have been very furious because I feel that what I saw was a very aggressive attack and I am hurt that my judgement is being called into question.

I think that your dog needs a new home for the time being - he is OBVIOUSLY NOT the same placid dog your DH had when he was a child - far from it.
And so what if the dog's poorly? He still bit a baby.
And so what if the baby was patting his head / leg / whatever. He still bit a baby.

My friend is seriously disfigured because of her very placid golden lab just 'out of the blue' turned on her and bit her face - took a huge flap out of her cheek.

I think you should listen to your gut.
"I no longer want the dog around the children." Sounds like you have made up your mind but your Dh and MIL have doubted your evidience and your decision.

The dog needs to go to the vet and to be rehomed in a childless house. It's certainly cheaper that plastic surgery for any babies / neighbourhood children.

Just to add, if a dog bit my child I would sue the owner and insist the dog was destroyed, and I'm sure other parents would also.
If you decide that your dog is going to stay even though it bit your baby, then you are liable if it bites another child, whatever you say about your liability. It could prove VERY expensive for you.