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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To now dislike my dd's class teacher after finding her on MN?

464 replies

absinthe · 25/02/2010 14:48

She wasn't very complementary about the little dah-lings in her care and I am silently fuming now. I completely randomly feel upon her user name and looked at her profile on the off chance that it might be her and there she was - pics n' all. She does not post a lot but one of her posts would put her in line for at least a formal warning if not more.

Can't say who she is but it is definitely her - without a shadow of a doubt.

I have never had MN cross over into RL before. Is it wrong of me to glance at her generally boring posts, just because it's her?

Maybe I could drop subtle hints about the fact that I use MN too just to see her reaction.

In any case, I think it was a bit sloppy and feel she should have taken more care to make herself anonymous.

OP posts:
LittleMrsHappy · 25/02/2010 21:03

The teacher the OP has mentioned has been unprofessional in her conduct, everybody have have a whinge about their said profession (myself included, but I dont think the GSCC, would take to highly of me being unprofessional by getting personal towards my caseloads). Her code of practice needs to be addressed, which she has failed to meet by being personal, and her standard also readdressed considerably, if she want to post on a public forum about her profession, then she can do, but she also has to remain professional and also not be personal about her pupils, as she is potentially opening herself up disciplinary action.

As for the wish list it is very dubious and also unneeded and towards your original OP, why did you goggle her?, was it to dig more dirt on her than you already have? which is completely unnecessary and also pathetic!

She is human and can talk about her profession, but she cannot get personal, or say things that can damage the reputation of her workforce and children.

Its why codes of practice are there for, to make our professional work life easier and also to protect us from any wrong doings.

Original poster
absinthe · 25/02/2010 21:04

"Get a grip, you kicked it off by posting here in AIBU" - maybe that says more about AIBU than me?

OP posts:
deaddei · 25/02/2010 21:04

Sorry you've lost it now op.
I would retire now, as you said you would a couple of posts back.

wastwinsetandpearls · 25/02/2010 21:06

Absinthe I did marry the wrong man we divorved after a few months. Not that I should have married the other one either.

I am not sure if you are mad or trying to be funny.

NeedLawadvice · 25/02/2010 21:06

Absinthe: I was talking about if you continue to behave in real life the way your behaving online, the school and police will take a very dim view.

And yes I do know exactly how hard it is to get any form of conviction for stalking, I had to move the length and breath of the UK five times in 2 years due to a stalker.

Still doesn't mean you won't be done for harassment IF you behave like this in real life.

Northernlurker · 25/02/2010 21:08

I'm falling about laughing at Absinthe being disgusted by the vitriol - pot and kettle mean anything to you?

tethersend · 25/02/2010 21:11

Never mind teachers' behaviour out of school- You should see what the parents get up to in their free time.

It really is a worry, as these people are in sole charge of the children I teach for 17 hours a day.

Surely I have a right to know what goes on?

skihorse · 25/02/2010 21:11

I'm falling about laughing at Absinthe so enraged at the answer to AIBU being an almost unanimous "YES"!

yummyyummyyummy · 25/02/2010 21:11

MY DS's friend got into a lot of trouble at school for posting on a friends wall on FB that that he wasn't looking forward to a chemistry exam because he didn't think Dr XXXX was a very good teacher.

Original poster
absinthe · 25/02/2010 21:13

OK, shouldn't have reported back on her wishlist but I was on Amazon anyway as I have already explained. I have also explained that she is hardly ever on MN and that I am not going to take it further in any way, shape or form so what's up? Worst-case scenario - she recognises herself is momentarily , then even but then learns how to change her IDs and be more discreet online and is or even at her naivety.

Oh, I'm bored of this now, think i'll go back to the porn thread...

OP posts:
heckythump · 25/02/2010 21:14

I've just had positively minutes of fun checking out my friend's wishlists on Amazon. Never knew you could do that... thanks!

LittleMrsHappy · 25/02/2010 21:15

tethersend thats where your child protection comes in, but No unfortunately you do not have a "right" to anything, even parents dont have "rights" to their children, they have a "responsibility" towards them.

LittleMrsHappy · 25/02/2010 21:15

tethersend thats where your child protection comes in, but No unfortunately you do not have a "right" to anything, even parents dont have "rights" to their children, they have a "responsibility" towards them.

heckythump · 25/02/2010 21:15

That was a x-post!

thesecondcoming · 25/02/2010 21:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2010aQuintessentialOdyssey · 25/02/2010 21:25

"I seem to remember ordering the Malleus Maleficarum off the internet... "

I have never before been in the slightest curious as to Corys particular field until now!

NormaSknockers · 25/02/2010 21:30

Everyone's entitled to a good moan about their job, even teachers. We all know our DC aren't darling little angels every single second of the day so some days they probably will get on their teachers nerves & the teacher will need a good rant about it. She probably does need to be a little more discreet about her profile though

iggi999 · 25/02/2010 21:37

Well as a cautionary measure I've just deleted all the photos from my profile, in the light of finding out that anyone would consider stalking me because of my job. Never had any pictures of me (too ugly) but would be recognisable from photos of DS. Shame because I liked to have a photo of him my friends on this site could look at, hadn't been thinking about spies! You live and learn.

Goblinchild · 25/02/2010 21:38

'The teacher the OP has mentioned has been unprofessional in her conduct, everybody have have a whinge about their said profession (myself included, but I dont think the GSCC, would take to highly of me being unprofessional by getting personal towards my caseloads). Her code of practice needs to be addressed, which she has failed to meet by being personal, and her standard also readdressed considerably, if she want to post on a public forum about her profession, then she can do, but she also has to remain professional and also not be personal about her pupils, as she is potentially opening herself up disciplinary action.'

LMH, I shall stay an unknown Goblin and enjoy the right of free speech. Was she being personal, or just fed up with a group of children?
It's another reason why parents don't understand why many teachers dislike living near work, or attending social functions with parents out of hours. To you it's a fun quiznight, to us it's unpaid overtime when you are still on duty, unable to drink, swear, smoke or speak without weighing every word first.

leavingonajetplane · 25/02/2010 21:39

thethersend that is an awfully long day, you must be a highly dedicated teacher and probably dont even have time to draw up an amazon wishlist

On the downside I definately sent my sis the wrong books for her birthday, 10 page wishlist and my carefully selected ones dont feature

Someone needs to get onto these amazon types about the wishlist being public by default. Or they will be surprised by the sudden mass switch to private settings. Be a great way to surprise someone by sending them their wishlist for christmas though wouldnt it? Like Santa coming....

MaggieMirabelle · 25/02/2010 21:41

i don't know how you would look up people on amazon.. do they use their real name for their wish list??

Absinthe, if you let her know you know who she is, please don't do it anonymously. That is 'the internet creeps'. Judging somebody anonymously is going to seem sinister to her.

Somebody did it to me a few days ago (because they didn't like my posts), and I can tell you, I did not think, 'gosh some reasonable objective, well-meaning person has judged me, I must change!' I thought 'what a nasty cowardly creep'.

The voodoo thing is odd though..... could it be somebody with the same name as the teacher?

probono · 25/02/2010 21:46

what a lot of double standards

teacher in position of trust identifies herself and criticises her identifiable and very young pupils to the world -- no problem

mother criticises unidentifiable teacher's booklist to the world -- "utterly deranged"

LittleMrsHappy · 25/02/2010 21:48

Goblin, I understand fully I also have to live by my code of practice/conduct, its a fine line to take tho, by displaying her venting on a public forum, and opening herself to disciplinary action, even if innocently done.

Have a vent, but keep yourself anonymous, if you dont want to cause trouble for yourself.

Its not exactly a reputation you want to show your child's parents either is it?

tethersend · 25/02/2010 21:48

Right.

LittleMrsHappy and leavingonajetplane, read my post again.

We will be discussing sarcasm and maths in our next lesson.

See me after class.

tethersend · 25/02/2010 21:50

Oooh, sorry, forgot- my crack dealer is coming round after school. Make it lunchtime.

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