to take my chicken poxed child out?

[Chickenpoxmama]

Dh thinks I was so I want to know what you think.

My toddler has Chicken pox - spots appeared Tuesday. Dh did two days working at home and now I've taken leave. The days dh did at home I was able to take older child to school but dh couldn't do that today because of getting in to work. So I put toddler in pushchair and took her, keeping well away from everybody. (dh fine with that bit) then we proceeded to a nearby supermarket to buy a few bits - newspaper for me, chocolate buttons for toddler, stuff to make older child's birthday cake, fruit, fresh bread. The supermarket was nearly empty, toddler in pushchair at all times, I kept at least 2 feet and mostly 3 feet away from people. I didn't go to the deli counter because there was an elderly couple there just in case and I asked the checkout lady if she'd had CP before handing her the magazine toddler held all the way round. She had. Toddler is not coughing or sneezing and obviously I didn't let her touch anything or anybody except her magazine (which she is so thrilled with ) So aibu?

Morloth - What I realised was that I was no closer to anyone in the supermarket than at school tbh. Except the checkout lady and I did make her aware before approaching. Interesting actually what a social taboo this turns out to b. Thank goodness I paid for my grapes before eating them or I'd be drummed off the net!

Yeah, but you needed to do school run, you didn't need a mag and some chocolate buttons.

i would go mad staying inside and would take a CP child for a walk in the woods or the park (NOT a playpark, a proper, big empty park) or up by the reservoir.

it'd do the child some good to get fresh air and the virus can't possibly live outside the body in January air temperatures for long. Obviously i would go out of my way to stay very far away from any other walkers.

but i would NOT take my child into town or a shop or library.

SDTG I have explained why that wasn't possible.

I'm a bit confused, I had chicken pox as a child and shingles in my late teens.

So at what point was I immune from it? Am I now immune from it?

The doctor told me at the time that you had to have the chicken pox virus in your system to develop shingles. Shingles is horrible, can be life-threatening and can cause blindness (I still get pains where it erupted).

I am genuinely curious though and would like to understand how this works.

A friend was made to share a bed with her infected sister, aged 10/11 ish and instead of getting chicken pox, got shingles and was very ill - how does that work?

The magazine was for toddler. I had a proper grown up newspaper

"Therefore you or your child should stay at home until all of the blisters have fully crusted over, and this usually happens five to seven days after the first blister appears."

I know it is not a 'stay at home' campaign, but this is one of the first pieces of advice on the nhs website. I think it is pretty much standard knowledge, that people infected with chickenpox should stay at home.

flying cloud - generally you can't get chicken pox once you've had it. So you were immune in your childhood against CP - as most of the population are. However the virus remains in your system and that can flare up on multiple occasions causing shingles. A person with shingles can give a non-immune person CP but it doesn't happen the other way round so i've no idea what happened to your sister - excpet that she must have been in contact with the CP virus at some previous point to be able to develop shingles. Some people can get it very mildly.

flyingcloud - you are immune to chicken pox after you've had it once, however, the virus stays in your system and can present as shingles anytime from then onwards.

if you get shingles you have the CP virus in your system and are probably immune whether you remember or noticed having CP or not.

People have explained the risks and possible consequences for people you've unnecessarily exposed to the chicken pox virus yet you're still amazed that it's such a 'social taboo'?

Thanks.

So this talk of gaining immunity is pretty moot, as you'll only be ensuring that you have a chance (however small) of having shingles at some point in your life, which is horrid.

Chicken pox is one of the herpes family of viruses (herpes zoster? help me out any docs here). In the case of chicken pox, unlike 'classic' herpes, it doesn't reoccur in the same form but still sticks around in your body and can come back as shingles. A lot of people have had CP without knowing it - indeed when I was tested abroad I also discovered I was immune to measles, despite the fact neither I nor any of my siblings had (to my knowledge) actually had it when we were kids (in those pre-MMR days).

The magazine was for toddler. I had a proper grown up newspaper
Glad you're still feeling so smug with yourself. You went against public health guidelines and did the wrong thing!
As I said before, I hope someone elses child doesn't get as bad a case as my DD2 had or worse someone who's immunosuppresed through you taking your child out!
Your child may only have a mild case like my DS2, 100 or so spots, but spare a thought for those of us who've nursed really bad cases. Spots in mouth, throat, ears, through digestive system and out the other end, ended up on antibiotics as so poorly!
Yes DD2 caught them from her older brother, but he got them from a random stranger out & about, possibly like you. Cheers!!!
I've had over 4 weeks with kids cooped up, did shopping when DH was home, like any sensible and thoughtful person would.

I have no idea why people do this. Ask AIBU then refuse to listen anyway.

You think you were reasonable. The majority of people think you were selfish, thoughtless and you put your own needs/wants before thinking of other people.

You don't care what the opinion of anyone else is so why ask?

five - just didn't want anybody think i was driven to read Grazia!

But five the random stranger could have been either of my children - out and about before they had any spots showing. This is how most cases are passed on in school (where they are far more likely to pick it up than out in the street/supermarket, and to where hardly anyone would send a child once he/she had any spots or temperature). And, as I say, I was embarrassed - but believe me I would have had them vaccinated if I could have I absolutely assure you.

My two sons have had chicken pox recently. The oldest came out new years day, and my youngest a wee and a half ago.
And shock horror, they are starting swimming lessons on saturday

The oldest is cleared up apart from the odd scab or two, and the youngest has quite a few scabs, but no blisters.

So on saturday we'll be at the pool! (with the addition of a cover it all swimsuit!)

just to add, I did mention to the woman on booking they had,had them. And she said as long as they were crusted we were good to go, cause she knows it takes ages for the scabs to go!

well my dd1 came out with cp on THE DAY i had dd2. so i was exposed while still pregnant. dd2 got cp at 3 WEEKS.

Gibbon - why post? Well dh and I did really midly disagree and whilst I was and remain quite comfortable with my actions it did set me wondering how mumsnet (as a reflection of public opinion in general) would react. So I asked and got exactly what I expected, hence the namechange - am (checks thread) smug, arrogant, selfish but not daft! Pretty knee jerk tbh. CP is uncontrolled, constantly present in the community, the majority of the time we don't know if we are exposed or are exposing others, one brief visit to the supermarket, carefully controlled as it was, adds only a tiny risk to that already present and yet you all got the pitchforks out and with the exception of Kinnies I think, nobody even bothered asking how toddler is or has been. (She's fine btw)

But your arrogance completely disregards the advice given by the DOH/NHS Choices. And having hung around a few parenting websites, the reaction you have received is fairly standard given the absolute self belief that you have in the validity and righteousness of your actions. No matter how many times you try to deflect/divert away from the issue in hand.

And anotherchickenpox mum - not sure why but your post comes across as confrontational as if you are daring people to challenge you with the 'shock horror' comment. Your kids spots have crusted over. Therefore they are not contagious.

I think YABU - the advice is to wait until the scabs are crusted over. That isn't what you did. Obviously you don't know when your child is about to get chicken pox, so they are more likely to pass it on then, but once you do know then you should not put yourself in a position where you could infect others.

I do not know where DS got chicken pox from. I think it was at a toddler group we went to two weeks before he got chicken pox, but I have no way of knowing. He then kindly shared with DD who got it at 6 weeks old.

Maybe it's because you have not had the grace to say 'fair point, I could have potentially put vulnerable people at risk, maybe I was a tad selfish thinking it would be ok.'

MY DD was poorly before Christmas and we were in the house staring at 4 walls for 2 weeks so I understand cabin fever. I do think you were selfish and maybe it's my pregnancy overprotective hormones speaking but you have come across as all those things you listed.

My point is you don't think you were unreasonable, you won't ever think you were unreasonable, so why start an AIBU thread?

OP, I think you are not helping your cause (if you even have one) by seemingly being utterly flippant and facetious about it.

People are taking you seriously yet feel you are not offering the same respect in return.

It's a waste of our time.

Exactly FA.

Funny how people can act under a cowardly name change isn't it?