To have become irritated by friend's 8 year old yesterday?

[Sanctos]

Went to friends for dinner yesterday with DS (4 months) and DH.

As soon as we got there her DD (8) said "why is he not wearing shoes?" so I said "because he doesn't need them, he doesn't walk yet" so she pulled a face and said "well, yeah ... but it's cold you know"

Anyway, I let it go and then 10 minutes later I heard her asking her mother "do we have any blankets for (DS)? they havn't even put a jumper on him". the house was a bloody sauna with the heating on full blast so I'd taken his jumper off!

Friend then came in laughing saying "have you heard her! she's a right mother hen" and I felt like saying "no, she's a cheeky little sod actually".

A bit later on, DS starts whinging. She promptly rolled her eyes, stood there with her hands on her hips and said "bottle? that's usually what babies cry for you know!" grrr I was getting really irritated by this point, as was DH. Especially as friend was just finding it all ammusing.

Anyway these comments kept up all day and I ended up leaving early in the end because she was just irritating the shit out of me. AIBU for getting wound up by a kid?

No excuse for being rude imo. Lovely/sweet that she took an interest in the baby not so lovely/sweet that she felt the need to roll her eyes with hands on hips.

Did want to add hate the use of the word brat though.

You should let it all slide off your back OP secure with the knowledge that in 5 yrs time your host will not be finding her daughter's antics and comments very amusing at all. scratch that. in 3 yrs or less.

this girl learned the behaviour from somewhere and she has her mother's blessing approval of it at the mo.

rod back an all comes to mind.

not all only children are rude or PF(only)B

my dd is unfailingly polite to adults, don't like rudeness in any child

I could imagine my 6yo dd, and possibly my 5yo ds doing exactly the same. I hope stop her doing it though if it seemed to annoy anybody.

My dd does have one friend who used to annoy me intensely, until one day it clicked that in fact it was the mother who irritated me (single child, mother thought she was sunshine incarnate, constant comments on how sweet/clever/talented/amusing/amazing her daughter was). Since then I only invite the child around for playdates or take her out with us, and don't socialise with the mum, and we get on absolutely fine. Are you sure your problem is with the girl and not, in fact, with your friend?

opps, sorry:

...hope I would stop her doing it...'

My palm would be itching in such circumstances. I'd just sigh and smile sweetly and tell her that she will find LEARNING about babies really interesting when she IS OLDER and MORE MATURE.

I agree with the poster who said that we only have the OP's description of the incident, we don't know the full story. Tbh the OP sounds a bit highly strung. She should have explained to the child in a calm manner why the baby didn't have a jumper on etc.

YABU

erm when i was 8 i would never have spoken to an adult like that, i can't believe some of you think it's ok! being interested in the baby is one thing, giving attitude to an adult is another and her mum needs to tell her to show a bit of respect (can't believe i just typed that).
can't stand cheeky children

YABU. She is only 8 and was actaually trying to take an interest in your baby.

Um, might you just be feeling a bit knackered, hormonal and unsure of your parenting skills, especially if this is your first baby? Try not to take it all personally - she was just eight and being a bit pert and irritating.
My kids are much older than yours and boy have they taught me the value of humility - I'm very, very wary of judging another person's children now. Because no matter how great a parent you are, there are times when your kids, by the time they are 12 months old plus, will really embarrass you. Even your lovely adorable little bundle of perfection will probably piss people off too when he/she is eight - unimaginable though that is right now! Cut both the kid and parents a bit of slack, I say.

OP, come back to this thread when your is is 8

YABU

She is only young and being attentive to your baby. Is IS really cold and seeing a baby without socks might have seemed unusual to her. You sound quite uptight tbh.

She is still a child - therefore why not explain, rather than just get ticked off.

Oh, and use it for your benefit... ie "oooh, could you get me the changing bag/ a drink whatever" Kids love to be involed

this is so funny.

your baby will grow into an annoying child.

actually, the 8 year old sounds normal enough to me. my 7 year old dd might ask questions like this. I wouldn't assume she was being annoying ALL the time. some of it yes, but she doesn't see babies much.

very odd. (the op i mean)

My dd can't be 'normal' if that's how little girls are expected to behave. I'd have been mortified if she'd spoken to an adult like that when she was eight. I hate all this 'wait until your child is that age' stuff as though yours will inevitably become rude and obnoxious too.
There's nothing wrong with a child showing an interest but sarcasm ('Bottle? that's usually what babies cry for you know!') is a sign of ingrained brattiness imo.

She was probably just trying to help but it obviously came across v badly!! However, I think her mum should have said something and told her that the parents know how to look after their own baby. I have a 7 year old DD and a baby a little older than yours. She is fantastic with the baby and really wants to help She likes other people's babies/ toddlers too and will sometimes pick them up regardless of whether or not they are enjoying it. I would definitely intervene in these situations.

YANBU. The girl's mother should have stopped her using that tone and words and eye rolling etc. She sounds rude and she needed a parent to show her that and to show her/teach her how to take an interest in your baby without being rude. Agree with someone up thread - your friend was at fault, she shouldn't have let her daughter be so rude.

YABU, she's just being a normal 8yo girl. Wait till she's 9 or 10 and those hormones REALLY kick in!

I am really shocked that anyone thinks talking like that to visitors is normal in a child. I don't find that normal behaviour that should just be accepted.

FFS What is it with parents thinking their child being rude is 'cute'??

Its' not. Its' a PITA.

She was bloody rude and her parents should have pulled her up on it.

I would have thought 'what a brat!' But not have said it as you shouldnt call 8yr olds brats (even if they are behaving like one!)

It is the parents job to teach her manners and they didnt so they are BU and not her.

What's all this "come back to the thread when your child is 8" stuff about? I have 4 children, 3 of whom are older than 8 and I still think the child in the OP sounds like a very irritating madam. I loathe it when children try to be adult before they have learnt adult manners. She may not have meant any harm but her mother definitely should have told her to stop making comments and confirmed that as the baby's mother, you know best.

It's hard to deal with a rude child who's parent thinks that their rudeness is endearing isn't it?
We have friends with a 10 yr old who constantly asks questions about my (sn) DD's reading level etc and rolls her eyes when I answer.... both myself and DH would love to give her a slap but her mum likes the way she talks to adults "with confidence"