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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

with MILS inept catering plans

158 replies

FolornHope · 26/12/2009 11:37

we go tomorrow
is family get together - very nice
then she said "I have no food for monday, i dont knwo what we will eat"

dh says " not everyone is obsessed with food like your family"

i say "its impolite not to have SOMETHING sorted"

am i right or is he wrong?

OP posts:
midori1999 · 26/12/2009 12:42

TBH, I can see why your husband has said it's a class thing (upon further explaination from you) and I think it's maybe his 'polite' way of saying you're being a snob.

I am a real foodie, I love cooking, amn pretty damn good at it if I say so myself, and everyone loves coming here for dinner as they know it will be some sort of amazing, top class reastaurant style food. I probably AM a total food snob.

However, when invited to visit others, I do not dwell on what food they will provide, because I am sure in almost all cases it will at least be edible and I won't starve. Plus, I will get to enjoy great company. I have never found a visit to anyoen totally unbearable because of the food they did (or didn't) provide.

Like I said, just ring her and ask if she would like you to bring things?

dexter73 · 26/12/2009 12:43

Take a few Pot Noodles!

TinselianAstra · 26/12/2009 12:47

If she has invited you round and is not bothering to do anything nice then that's not a class thing, just a bit inconsiderate.

If she is trying to do nice things but her idea of nice is not your idea of nice (handcrafted individual goats-cheese thingys vs party food from Iceland) then you'll just have to suck it up (some of it literally).

Original poster
FolornHope · 26/12/2009 12:48

oh i know
i know i am being a nob
i jsut hate eating crap food
Yes it wont kill me but sheesh.

OP posts:
VinegarTinselTits · 26/12/2009 12:49

'she isnt used to any kind of (ulps nervously) dinner party kind of catering.'

commoner

why did you marry beneath yourself?

geordieminx · 26/12/2009 12:49

I so know where you are coming from. Our family are all foodies. Mum plans xmas 4 months ahead

Dh's mum lives by herself. She doesnt eat - seriously. She weighs just under 6 stone, smokes 60 cigs a day and looks like Mother Teresa. She doesnt have a cooker , just a microwave. Thats it. Her cupboards are always full... of pot noodles, paste, crips and tunnocks tea cakes.

She's lovely, but I wouldnt want to eath there. Ever. When we go, we stay at SIL's, and have take-aways.

dexter73 · 26/12/2009 12:50

I know where you are coming from! I would rather eat toast than some crap pasta n sauce!

Original poster
FolornHope · 26/12/2009 12:50

lol at tinsel.

OP posts:
Northernlebkuchen · 26/12/2009 12:51

Why is 'nice' food an essential part of Christmas hospitality? Food is to hold body and soul together. The true meaning of Christmas is Love and that Love is expressed in part in family bonds. I enjoy cooking at Christmas but that doesn't mean I love anyone any more than at any other time. If 'nice' food is put above being loving then I despair!

Original poster
FolornHope · 26/12/2009 12:51

my aunt is a fab cook - was caterer but she too chain smokes and never eats. strange eh?

OP posts:
TinselianAstra · 26/12/2009 12:52

You laughing at me or Vinny? Lots of tinsel around this time of year.

That's a worrying description of Mother Theresa there geordieminx!

Original poster
FolornHope · 26/12/2009 12:52

no xmas is fud

OP posts:
Original poster
FolornHope · 26/12/2009 12:52

i think both of you.!

OP posts:
moondog · 26/12/2009 12:54

I can't be doing with shite.
We once drove 8 hours to an ..inlaw's (and family) to be confronted by them and a host of other relatives finishing a buffet.
We were shepharded into dining room (alone-noone joined us) for sliced bread and marge and some vile 'casserole' she had done with chepa chicken and tinned soup.
I was stunned into silence (v rare).

At our place it is champers, bbqs, the best of everything.

I don't expect people to take the obsessive interest in food I do but ffs.

FH, i would be whisking your family off for lunch in a nice pub.

My pet Christmas hate is those plastic trays of cheap sloppy dips and those vile 'party bite' thnigs you cook form frozen-1000 dimsum for about £1.

Tis very depressing.

Fibilou · 26/12/2009 12:55

"Why is 'nice' food an essential part of Christmas hospitality? Food is to hold body and soul together"

Am fascinated as to why you choose to name yourself after a piece of German Christmas confectionary if food is uninteresting to you...

Northernlebkuchen · 26/12/2009 12:57
nothingofthesort · 26/12/2009 12:59

That's just it isn't it. When you invite people over you make some effort, it's only polite. Clear up a little, make something nice-ish to eat etc. There is a huge difference between getting your whole meal out of a packet and turning into Gordon Ramsey for the evening. A small effort is only polite.

Northernlebkuchen · 26/12/2009 12:59
moondog · 26/12/2009 13:00

And i often wonder why we don't just have done with it and dpo mass catering in aisle of Tesco as everything anyone ever serves seeems to come from there.

geordieminx · 26/12/2009 13:01

The worst thing that anyone could serve is an "Iceland Party Platter"... ((shudder))

Pic of Mother Teresa MIL on profile. In the blue. Told ya.

VinegarTinselTits · 26/12/2009 13:02

i would disown my family if they didnt feed me nice food

Original poster
FolornHope · 26/12/2009 13:03

my mil is fantastic
kind, caring and as she will say not a happy cooker!

OP posts:
Fibilou · 26/12/2009 13:04

Northernlebkuchen, sorry I wasn't meaning to sound snippy. As a MASSIVE foodie/ex chef I just can't understand how people can't be riveted by food.
I think about it far more than is healthy

fairycake123 · 26/12/2009 13:06

I fucking love shit food. I love nice food too but I absolutely delight in pre-packaged crap. Venison - mmmmm! Microwaveable chicken kievs - mmmmmm!

One naff meal is not going to kill you. Try and approach it as a novel, exotic experience - think of it as visiting some kind of savage and sampling their primitive cuisine.

dollishillbilly · 26/12/2009 13:07

Perhaps the OP should take a packed lunch