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AIBU?

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Original poster

Oh you cannae shove yer granny aff the bus

106 replies

PrammyMammy · 10/12/2009 15:11

I need a change from the wheels on the bus!! If i need to sing it one more time today my head will burst. My ds is almost 2 and bus mad.
Can i sing him that?? Can i? It wouldn't be too bad, i mean we sung it when young and never pushed my daddy's mammy off the bus.

Ds is standing next to me pulling my arm shouting "BUS BUS BUS" as we speak. !

OP posts:
Happyneverafter · 10/12/2009 22:36

When I were a lass in Scotland the last line to stop the bus I need a wee wee...

was... a wee wee drink o whisky.

CardyMow · 10/12/2009 23:49

My 7yo DS1's fave ditty atm is

Oh ah I lost my bra i left my knickers in my boyfriend's car, sung very loudly to his 11yo sister to annoy her....

And for some reason his dad's taught him
My old man's a dustman, he wears a dustman's cap, he farted through the keyhole and paralysed the cat, the table couldn't stand it the chairs they fell apart, and all because of my old man's supersonic fart...

giraffespullthesleigh · 10/12/2009 23:55

Oh I love cannae shove granny - almost as good as sky scraper wean!

champagnesupernova · 10/12/2009 23:56

you'll never get to heaven in a jumbo jet
cos the lord aint got, no runway yet

iwanttobepombear · 10/12/2009 23:59

oh you can't get to heaven
in a limousine
cos the Lord don't sell no gasoline.

I had forgotten all of these bus songs - reminds me so much of school trips.

These are hilarious - you must teach all of these to your DS!

magicofchristmas · 11/12/2009 00:14

Ooh ah I lost my bra
I left my knickers in my boyfriends car
My bra strap broke
My boyfriend choked ????????

What was the ending to this? PLS

That takes me back a few years LOL

PrettyCandlesandTinselToo · 11/12/2009 14:41

My grandad's a lavatory cleaner
He spends all his day in the pit
And when he comes home in the evening
His boots are all covered in sh-INE your buttons with Brasso
It's only three pennies a tin
You can buy it or nick it from Woolies
Though I doubt if they've got any in.

What I don't get is that we were young ladies at a posh school, bad language was not tolerated at all, yet the teachers would let us get away with some fairly rude and risque songs when we were on coach trips.

GibberingGinger · 11/12/2009 15:07

We've modified the wheels on the bus with extra verses including

The mobiles on the bus go
Dah da da daahh, dah da da daahh, dah da da da daaaaa (nokia mobile tune)

The drivers on the bus say
Correct change please, (this might only work in Edinburgh)

The neds/chavs on the bus say
Spare a quid pal?

Makes it slightly less tedious, however DD is too young and doesn't really understand the words properly yet

McSnail · 11/12/2009 15:16

How about Nelly the Elephant? good tune and heartwarming story...

OLittleTownOfGlasvegas · 11/12/2009 15:24

Oh you'll never get to heaven
in a roller skate
cause a roller skate
is far too late!

the gin verse was my favourite though.

think we've got off the point here though, I'm guessing the OP's son wants a song about a bus, rather than ones we used to sing on buses?

Galena · 11/12/2009 15:50

magicofchristmas, my memory of it is:
Ooh ah I lost my bra
I left my knickers in my boyfriends car
My bra strap broke
My boyfriend choked
and we all went to heaven
in a little row boat

but I'm sleep deprived so this may be wrong!

daisy99divine · 11/12/2009 15:53

Did you sing the chorus?

"I ain't gonna greive and I aint gonna worry
Aint gonna leave this world in a hurry
I aint gonna leave this world!"

gothgirl77 · 11/12/2009 16:12

Cannae shove your granny aff a bus is great (though don't know what DC's daddy's mammy will think of it!) - the other one that works is 'my boy's a cowboy' - one of Singing Kettle's ones I think.
"My boy's a cowboy/he's a New Yorker/
I'd do most anything to keep him in style
He's got a pair of feet/Just like two plates of meat
That's the way the money go-o-oes.."
And on - a pair of hands like frying pans, a pair of lips like greasy chips, a pair of eyes like mutton pies.. strange looking lad..

nappyaddict · 11/12/2009 16:41

We used to sing:

Stop the bus I want a wee wee
Stop the bus I want a wee wee
Stop the bus I want a wee wee
Because the people at the back can't swim

Now on party buses

Stop the bus I want a wee wee
Stop the bus I want a wee wee
Stop the bus I want a wee wee
A wee wee social drink

What versions did you all sing?

nappyaddict · 11/12/2009 16:43

Oh and a wee bag of chips/packet of crisps/the driver wants one too

CiderIUpAndSetIFree · 11/12/2009 16:50

Not a bus one, but one I loved as a child...

Aunty Mary had a canary, up the leg of her drawers;

When she farted, it departed, doon the leg o her drawers.

StayingSantasGirl · 11/12/2009 16:58

What about A Transport of Delight by Flanders and Swann - has to be THE iconic bus song for me!!

My favourite verse is:

When cabbies try to pass me,
Before they overtakes,
I sticks me flippin' 'and out
And I jams on all me brakes.
Them jackal taxi drivers
Can only swear and cuss
Behind that Monarch of the Road,
Observer of the highway code
That big six wheeler, scarlet painted
London Transport, diesal engine,
97 horsepower omnibus!

PrettyCandlesandTinselToo · 11/12/2009 17:20

Our version of the chorus was:

I ain't gonna grieve, my lord
I ain't gonna grieve, my lord
I ain't gonna grieve, my lord no more, any more.
I ain't gonna drink, I ain't gonna swear, I ain't gonna - you wouldn't dare!
I ain't gonna grieve, my lord no more, any more.

And because we had some very good singers in our year, we often sang it in three=part harmony. (Is there a [boak] emoticon? )

miserablemoralvacuum · 11/12/2009 17:33

OMG!!! My grandma used to sing the Aunt Mary one, about a prudish eponym on the other side of the family, but we never knew why because our parents always got cross and stopped her at the first phrase... HA! will definitely be teaching DS that one for when he meets his Great Aunt Mary this Christmas...

travellingwilbury · 11/12/2009 17:46

Charlie had a pigeon a pigeon a pigeon
Charlie had a pigeon a pigeon he had

He flew out one mornin he flew out one night

he came back next mornin

all covered in .......repeat ad infinitum until your teachers head explodes

travellingwilbury · 11/12/2009 17:47

Sorry I know it has nothing to do with busses but did bring back a marvellous memory of a school trip to Whitby

blackteaplease · 11/12/2009 17:49

We used to sing my aunty Mary, had a canary, up the leg of her drawers, pull the string and ding-a-ling, down came Santa Claus!

Also I remember my dad singing one which started oh my granny's in the cellar, I'm surprised you cannae smell her ....I've forgotten the rest of the words though.

And as for stop the bus it's a wee, wee cup of tea (and a biscuit).

TheCrackFox · 11/12/2009 17:52

"Aunty Mary, had a canary up the leg of her drawers, when she farted, down it darted, down the leg of her drawers"

That song will always remind me of my dad who used to sing it all the time.

MrsMuddle · 11/12/2009 17:53

blackteaplease, you have rung a very ancient bell in my head...

Granny's in the cellar
I'm surprised you cannae smell her
Blah blah blah..
And in her eye there's matter
It keeps dripping the batter

Is that the same song, or have I mixed up two childhood songs?

Also

Last night there was a murder in the fishshop
A wee dug stole a haddy bone
A bug dug tried to take it aff him
So I hit it with a tattie scone.

Am drunk - had work lunch today. Can you tell?

poinsettydawg · 11/12/2009 17:54

in her eye there's matter?

Are they really lyrics of a children's song?

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