Kirstie Allplop on Xmas crafts and Newsnight

[nigelslaterfan]

AIBU to have had enough of this pompous harridan?

Yes she does patronise us in a truly beautifully-spoken way and she has a lovely face, I'll give her that. But if ITV decided to commission an immoral live television event of Kirstie being chased to a likely mortal end by wolves through an attractively Christmassy nordic landscape; then I would watch.

No Kirstie NO I will NOT be doing a glass blowing course in order to learn to blow my own baubles thanks you great buxom strumpet.

And no, I don't regularly spend 10 to 20 squid on an individual Xmas tree decoration you titled hussy, I don't care how many years they last, my father is not a Lord and I shall not be buying them. Just go home to Buckinghamshiire or the Cameron's house and whittle yourself a turkey centrepiece and leave me alone,

Did no-one else think 'doesn't she have children AND dogs?'

Looked like she was happy to randomly poison them with holly and ivy berries or ricin castor oil plants draped all over the banisters...

Meadowgate

She is very sexy, but oh she does go on

Mollie did you have to do that? I'm soooooo .

Hate the programme mind.

I'm just gobsmacked at the weekly rental - minimum £2000. Very high for where it is (back end of nowhere).

" click here to "let" meadogate?
no lady YOU are letting we are --not00 reNTING

dullard

My fav last night was her manky "individual" homemade stocking. The woman is mad I tell you !

SCargot - think that Scottish house was one of the Relocation jobbies

Can I just say, that this is one of my favourite mumsnet threads of all time and I have been coming off and on here since the year 2000, so I have seen some threads in my time. This thread is mumsnet at its best imo, loads of rampant class prejudice (including me!) loads of self deprecation and then people with inside information! I love it!

yeah you would think all the cats urine on the skip sofa would make it more flammable.

LOL oldraver and AvrilH and Elfytigga

I wonder if a holiday let is different (from a fire point of view)? Or maybe the old stuff is only there for the cameras and is moved out for the holiday rentals [cynical moi? emoticon].

Just caught the start tonight and - due to this thread - saw the table and thought "I want to shag on that!"

The fact that David Cameron even considered her as an advisor on housing at all demonstrates to me just how out of touch Tories are with reality, tbh.

i still adore kirstie, i bet in real life she would be lovely to be friends with. don't like the way the programme has her set to up be some cross between nigella (vampish outfits, eating everything she makes etc), and hugh fearnley whatshisname (a la river cottage, hunter wellies, driving around in an old land rover, foraging from ones own land etc). also don't get the homemade, doing things on the cheap via a programme which so obviously has a huge budget.

MintyCandyCane she has "WOW" written on her wall, to match her tattoo...

Kirstie, you are so bossy and Engerlish and happy in your own skin, and for that I salute you.

But, really, don't you think it's a bit smug to be showing us your HUGE second home whilst we are all struggling to pay our mortgages? I'd LOVE to spend all day embroidering and haggling with commoners in flea markets, but I can't bear to do so whilst I have children pulling at my (home-made) apron strings.

How do you manage to have an unhurried shop whilst you have small children? How do you manage to sit at the (ENORMOUS) kitchen table and paint the gold leaf onto the fruit without the children smearing their turkey twizzlers all over it?

I think the time is now for the revolution to begin. We work hard too, we would love to make our own candles, but we're too poor and too cash-strapped and too tired to be ARSED! Up the revolution, no more posh people on TV.

!!!!
Brilliant thread, nigelslaterfa, I read your opener out to DP in-between laughing our arsses off.
DP came in earlier to ask me why I was watching Kristys Home repossessed Christmas, as it was a pile of steaming dog shit.
I explained to him that I was convinced that she is feeling guilty about all the people who had there houses repossessed, and was showing them how a old milk bottle full of jelly beans can make Christmas in the bed and breakfast that bit better.

Bet her kids thank her politely for the teddy, but start shaking the boxes looking for a new Wii -

Thing is though, I'm SOOOOOO envious. Bet I dream about her tonight, I think she might have replaced Cheryl Cole in my (non-lesbian, honest) affections...

I knew the gold fruit would be the turning point.

£20 for gold leafing the fruit, after all the comments about how 'cheap' all this stuff was.

And the way they tittered about how it was so completely worth it.

Point proven I think.

I'm gold leafing the turkey twizzlers. It looks sooooo lovely and soooo Christmassy (hugs self smuggly).

Look you could rent out Meadowgate yourself and decorate it your way just for fun!

I think the house is gorgeous, and she "found" some lovely things, and got some bargainous prices at London street markets...I'm so sure they weren't set up at all!

I really don't like the WoW in the kitchen though. It spoils it.
And the person who did her make up on this latest programme should be sacked. They made her look like a street walker version of Cruella de Ville. Not a good look.
Love her ring though, looks like you could do some serious damage with it!

I'm all for talking proper but we were rofling by the time she announced that the gold leaf cost £5 "par par".

I am also all for the idea that you don't have to be a slave to brand names/commercial tastes and that people should develop their own tastes and styles rather than relying on homestore places to do it for them. BUT she really should drop the schtick about it being cheaper. It just isn't and it makes her look like Marie Antoinette playing at shepherdesses.

"...it makes her look like Marie Antoinette playing at shepherdesses"

yep, that is why I am intrigued at her many fans here. Are people hankering after a return to the rigid class system, where everyone knew their place?

Or maybe it is just because she is a fat non slender role model

The pears looked shitola anyway.

Still it is good to see her helping out all her old boarding school chums by giving them a little slot on her show. Times are hard you know.