Roasting little children in shopping centres.

[Ninks]

AIBU to think that if you are going to drive in a heated car to a heated shopping centre then you should not dress your toddler or baby for sub-zero temperatures and then stay there for three hours?

I went into town with my sister, my DS and her toddler the other day. I'm in the S.E and it's very mild for November so I had on a T-shirt and light jacket as did my son as we were going to be inside. My sister was wearing a light top and no jacket as she is a bit big but my DN was dressed in tights, fluffy boots, a vest, fleecy top and a huge padded coat, plus a filthy but warm lacy pushchair insert.

At one point I asked my sister if she wanted to unbutton DN's coat as she was pouring with sweat, hair sticking to her and scarlet-faced but she just laughed and said she couldn't be bothered.

I have been known to "lose" hats, hats FFS, worn my sister's children now and again in hot shopping centres. Why does she do it? My toddler has warm clothes and boots for, er - walking. In the cold and wet and snow when he is ten minutes from home.

But she isn't the only one who does this is she? I am always seeing babies swaddled under layers of blankets that you'd use for freezing outside temperatures in the fecking heated mall and judging by the swathes of bags hanging from the pushchair they haven't only been there for a few minutes.

Roaring most of them are, obviously hot and bored and very uncomfortable. If any of my DC were in that sort of state I'd be racing home, but no, the poor children are relentlessly trundled "raaaan taaaaaan"

My two were always very fractious if too warm (in fact they still are at age 5 and 10, and are often hot and sweaty at night).

It was always a pain going shopping when you were in and out of overheated shops on cold days (no big indoor shopping centres near here) as I had to keep zipping and un-zipping coats/cosy-toes etc. However it would soon become obvious when they were too hot as they would get restless.

I really hate it when you see overwrapped babies but I'm never quite sure whether to comment on it to the mother (have never dared to yet). There does seem to be a tendency to believe that babies should be "kept warm"

About SIDS death in prams, perhaps the cause of death was not SIDS (which is bandied about too readily IMO), but plain ol' overheating.

Children should never be roasted, lightly steamed if anything and best taken raw.

I haven't seen this phenomenon.

Are they turning on spits? Aren't they a bit large to put in a bag? Or do you buy them in portions?

YANBU, I hate seeing kids bundled up. Having said that, old ladies are always at my DC and their utter failure to wear proper clothing (have to wrestle them into coats/ jumpers/ socks and tights, they hate them.)I have started putting a babygro on DS2 under his clothes because he can't get it off, the stripper.

The thread title made me PMSL though.

LOL i had mental image of weans,apple in gob roasting on a fire with that title

ninks do you and your sister have issues - you are most uncomplimentary when you describe her

My health visitor gave me some good advice when DS was born.

She said that it's better for your baby to be a little too cool than too warm because if a babys chilly they will cry & let you know but if a babys too hot they'll just become drowsy & unable to complain.

I am pretty vigilant about whipping off blankets & hats in shops but I'm forever having to remind DP about it.

Never bothered with a snowsuit for DS as it's so difficult to get the little wriggler into it. Cardigans + blankets are so much easier imo.

Wondering if I'm the only person who doesnt drive to the shopping centre

just read the 25% SIDS occur in pram -RUBBISH that is wholly erroneous and highly alarmist

Just a few issues scottishmummy yes,

Agree about maternity wards. I had DS on the hottest day of the year and we were by the windows. I was told off by a nurse because his hands were a bit cold. I was worried because his tummy and neck were terribly hot, thought it was the core that was important.

Good advice from your HV there Glenda.

Bronze I walk to the shops when I'm on my own and do wrap DS up when it's cold but unlayer (?) him when we get there.

We walk everywhere bronze DS did have a snowsuit for the pram when he was in there, but I used to take it off upon getting anywhere.

Now that he is up and running he wears the same as we do and takes off layers as and when needed.

I thought general guidance was put one more layer on your babies than you are wearing yourself. Always seemed fairly logical to me, but then we don't have any indoor shopping centres here in deepest darkest somerset!

I'm glad you like the thread title by the way, I love ambiguous phrases

ok i see,thanks ninks.

yes mental image roasting weans apple in gob on spit

Right next to the roast chestnut vendor. To be served with crusty bread

I think the problem stems from the older generation trying to pass on their "wisdom" about how to dress babies. When they themselves were young, most people didn't have central heating and so layers of clothing probably WERE needed. They seem to forget that houses and shops nowadays are actually very warm in winter and people, including babies, just don't need loads of layers indoors. Try telling them that though.....

When DS was about 10 days old we went to a Xmas party at a relative's house who I knew didn't have central heating and whose house was usually quite cold in winter, so I dressed him in a fleecy sleep suit. what I didn't realise was that an elderly uncle who'd been ill with a chest infection was there and so the fire in the front room had been turned up to full for the past few hours, and the whole place was roasting! DS was sleeping so I let him sleep. He didn't wake up at the expected time to have his bottle, and so after half an hour or so I decided to try and wake him up for it. He was too drowsy to have it, and I ended up having to strip him down to his vest and nappy for 10 mins to cool him down so that he was alert enough to drink!! Needless to say I put him straight in a cotton babygro after that for the rest of the night. Was scary to realise how much being too hot had affected him - he didn't get so hot that he was in danger of having a convulsion etc, but it certainly made him a lot more drowsy than he normally was at home.

Was at a walkin centre once at the end of May and someone came in pushing a travel system thingy with a young baby in it. The baby was dressed in loads of layers and had a thick woolly blanket doubled over up to the chin, and a hat!! DS who was a similar age had a Tshirt and little shorts on as it was a hot day, and he was sweating even then! No wonder those parents had brought their baby to the walk-in centre, probably the poor kid's temp was sky high!

I was always getting told off by well meaning elderly women when DD was a baby for not wrapping her up enough. My mother still thinks I'm neglectful for not putting a vest on DD every time we leave the house, regardless of the time of year/temperature

I was probably guilty of this (though not to the same extent, I always thought one extra layer for babuies under 6m but I normally just used the footmuff.

Thinking back on it now I wouldn't get a footmuff again instead I would have a sheepskin liner and blanket that way I could add or take away as appropriate, sheepskin liners are good for keeping temperature regulated right?

Glad that you are looking out for your sistrs kids but next time I would just take jacket off myself, whether it gets you into trouble or not atleast your DN would have been comfier.

So YANBU in worrying about it, how does she cope with other aspects of looking after er kids? Would you say anything she does makes you think about neglect etc?

If it does then I would phone SS about it.

I wanted to do it but she would have fought me rather than let me tell her she was wrong and then stormed off so it wouldn't have done any good.

I was close to calling SS about her latest boyfriend but he is off the scene.

Last fight we had was when DN was a day old and she refused to give her a bottle because it hadn't been four hours since she was last fed. She was howling. Even my parents left in tears and in disgust over that one and they will usually put up her her decisions

Ah LittleB you need to do what we did and move commute to Real Shops when the need takes us (from Somerset now in SE Wales- back in Somerset in a few hours actually, carnival do)

I would happily walk to the shops Bronze, did when we lived close, but it's a 6 mile trek now so nah LOL

Ninks, your sister sounds like a nasty piece of work!

Agreed that if she would have just stormed off it probably would have done little more than wind her up... was her boyfriend harming the children?

I also think your parents need to learn to stand up to her and let her know what she's doing is wrong.

Ninks - your sister sounds dreadful.

How many dc does she have?

If she is that scary/intimidating in public, I can only imagine what she is like behind closed doors.

Babies don't get as warm as we do, becuase they are sitting or laying still in a pushchair, rather than pushing it / walking around / carryoing shopping / etc, so there is some tenuous basis for giving them more layers. Having said that, I am one of those that gets comments about my DC's not being wrapped up enough - but I have never got over the trauma of DS1 being born in the middle of a heatwave and being terrified he would overheat!

Blimey I can't step out the door in glasgow without some granny telling me my weans ' hands are cold or feet are cold or noses are cold....

MIL would put them in Teflon suits if she could...I see overwrapped babies in cafes all the time in winter and it especially annoys me when the raincover is left on too.