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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to object to breastfeeding friendly schemes

117 replies

Babieseverywhere · 05/11/2009 08:57

I have been reading this thread and the related website.

I understand that this group has great aims and is/will be helpful to many breastfeeding mothers but I don't like "breastfeeding friendly schemes"

I just think that in asking permission for something we already have a legal right to do, is setting a dangerous precedent. Some cafes/shops might feel having said no to the scheme that they have some right to hassle nursing mothers (which they don't)

I worry that by having safe ghettos areas where breastfeeding is allowed, may cause more problems for mothers who wish to feed where needed and don't wish to be shut away

Surely we should be pushing the law to protect all mothers from feeding their babies in any safe location. My rule of thumb if a baby can be safely bottle fed somewhere, it follows that this is also a suitable place to breastfeed.

OP posts:
Tee2072 · 05/11/2009 09:02

I happen to agree with you. This is why I have not taken the survey linked to by MN or agreed to 'push the agenda' of the group.

StealthPolarBear · 05/11/2009 09:04

interesting point
will think...
it's not just about bf friendly places tho, there's stuff about MW training, education etc

bedlambeast · 05/11/2009 09:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

dawntigga · 05/11/2009 09:10

Erm, there is no legal protection for bf'ing in England.

FWIWTiggaxx

StealthPolarBear · 05/11/2009 09:15

but that doesnt mean its legal to hassle bf mums, just that theres no specific protection, and you can be asked to move on (don't have to comply!)

StealthPolarBear · 05/11/2009 09:15

afaik it's legal to bf everywhere!!

PyrotechnicToadstool · 05/11/2009 09:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StealthPolarBear · 05/11/2009 09:17

have you really? what happened? you poor thing

Babieseverywhere · 05/11/2009 09:24

Breastfeeding has never been illegal. The laws passed in Scotland made hassling breastfeeding mother illegal.

OP posts:
PyrotechnicToadstool · 05/11/2009 09:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ErikaMaye · 05/11/2009 09:26

There's a part of the Sex Discrimination Act stating that you can't ask / tell a mother to stop breast feeding or hassle her for doing so.

curiositykilledscarybin · 05/11/2009 09:38

I think the breastfeeding friendly scheme is good. I was once asked to stop breastfeeding in a cafe that was part of the scheme, I pointed out that they had a sticker and they couldn't do anything so they had to go back to the sniffy woman who was complaining and explain.

If people adopt the feeding scheme, even if they don't mean to it is nice and welcoming to see as a mother looking for a place to feed your baby.

Re the manifesto - I fully support all the aims. I find the manifesto itself rather off-puttingly (but perhaps it is necessary) militant and I dislike the way they quote the conclusions of certain research papers as though they are facts when they are not but I feel the cause is worthy.

Morloth · 05/11/2009 09:40

I am not sure.

We have had something like this for a while now in Sydney and while I have always felt quite comfortable breastfeeding whether I happen to be and have never had a comment, the sight of the little pink sticker almost always meant that cafe/restaurant got the business whether I had DS with me or not, because not everyone else does have the same sort of confidence and it is nice to be made to feel welcome.

If it lifts off here I will keep an eye out for the stickers and will use those businesses over others whether I intend to breastfeed or not.

StealthPolarBear · 05/11/2009 09:42

i see sorry PT, yes i did think you meant a specific event. Sorry you felt that way
"I was once asked to stop breastfeeding in a cafe that was part of the scheme, I pointed out that they had a sticker and they couldn't do anything so they had to go back to the sniffy woman who was complaining and explain.
oh i wish i'd been there

PeachyInCarnivalFeathers · 05/11/2009 09:43

Hmmm

Pesonally I like BFF signs

I am BF a 19 month old, and have always ben very uncomfortable about feeding in public ((this is ds4, though not all BF for very long). I'malso very confrontation averse for somevery r4alreasons, and do get very edgy if I even think there is a chance that someone might get funny at me for BF.

I don't tend to BF ds4 out and about now as he is so mobile and discretion is impossible, but certainly at times I would have been far more comfy BF'ing in a signed place than just anywhere. I have done it pretty much anywhere, but its never my choice.

GhoulsAreLoud · 05/11/2009 09:46

curiosity.

I cannot believe that there are people in this country who would see a woman feeding her baby and expect someone to go and stop them.

What goes through their minds?

StealthPolarBear · 05/11/2009 09:48

oh no doubt she was waving her boob around
I laughed, but actually it's really really bad!

giggleloop · 05/11/2009 09:50

I agree with you now that I'm used to feeding. I really had to stand my ground in hospital outpatients with ds as they keep trying to make me sit in a cupboard to feed. Its litrally about 3x4 feet, has a sliding door because its so small and you can barely fit inside with your bag and your baby. You def can't fit in with your bag, your baby and your toddler. I've been going every 2 weeks for the past 9 months and almost every time there has been an issue with feeding. I also found out that the dr had seen other people ahead of me because I was feeding (not in the cupboard) so it was assumed that I couldn't speak to the dr at the same time. A bottle feeding parent would not have been put to the back of the queue imo. Its like they are being so considerate that its become inconsiderate iykwim.

I also think that more public bf will help normalise it and make women feel more comfortable about bf in general and public feeding in paticular. Having bf zones may make people uncomfortable about feeding in a non 'bf friendly' place.

However when I was just learning I wanted to be shut in a cupboard and I did feel better if there was a bf friendly type sticker or poster up.

But the reason I was worried about public feeding is because its so rarely seen, because people are put into cupboards to feed.

Its a bit of a vicious circle really.

The only time I had hassle I was in a forest.

Winibaghoul · 05/11/2009 09:52

Hah Ghouls, a lady from my bf group got hounded out of Morrisons for bf her 4 month old. Apparently a customer complained. A member of staff came over with TWO security guys and made this lady leave, despite her poor dd screaming because her feed was interrupted! (Morrisons was fined £2500 for this though)

Purplebuns · 05/11/2009 09:53

I thought it was legal to breastfeed, any where and to be stopped within the first 6months (of baby's life), was maternal discrimination and after 6 months, sexual discrimination.

I find the stickers welcoming though and prefer to attend restaurants that are pro-bf especially if it a slightly swankier do!

theyoungvisiter · 05/11/2009 09:57

Do you think though, that by having the stickers it would give people with an anti-bf agenda the opportunity to say "this isn't a BF friendly cafe, so go and and find one that is?"

And it might give the impression to new mothers that they could only feed in bf friendly locations?

I'd rather see it made illegal to harrass a bfing woman and campaign for that.

(AFAIK, the protection in the UK only applies to babies under 6 months. I don't think there is any legislation for babies above 6 months in England, only in Scotland? But I may be wrong).

me23 · 05/11/2009 09:59

gigglegoup that is outrageous a hosptial of all places. Which hospital is this I really think you should make a formal conmplaint, you have made me want to make a formal complaint to them

PeachyInCarnivalFeathers · 05/11/2009 10:04

TYV I think both is neded

A lawwould be fab, yes, but that will taketimeand during that period, stickers could really help

theyoungvisiter · 05/11/2009 10:11

I agree that a way of signally to bfing mums that they are welcome is a good thing.

But what I worry about though, is that the stickers won't only be visible to bfing mums, but also to the general public.

Other people may assume, that the absence of a sticker means they have a license to harass. Do you see what I mean?

I would worry that stickers would actually result in MORE people getting arsy. At the moment the (general) presumption is that you can bf anywhere, unless specifically told otherwise. Stickers might make people assume that the default is that you can't bf unless specifically told you can.

TheBlairSnitchProject · 05/11/2009 10:13

Hounded for BF-ing in a hospital!!

They ought to go and check out the maternity wards. Endless boobs out everywhere there as women try to work out WTF they're doing!!

I was shy when I had DS and only really felt comfortable BF-ing when we visited Scotland at 5 months old cause I knew I was "safe" from bother.

DD is due in December and I have a feeling that I am much more likely to be confident to feed out and about this time. A sticker would make me feel a little better though. Silly isn't it.

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