to object to breastfeeding friendly schemes

[Babieseverywhere]

I have been reading this thread and the related website.

I understand that this group has great aims and is/will be helpful to many breastfeeding mothers but I don't like "breastfeeding friendly schemes"

I just think that in asking permission for something we already have a legal right to do, is setting a dangerous precedent. Some cafes/shops might feel having said no to the scheme that they have some right to hassle nursing mothers (which they don't)

I worry that by having safe ghettos areas where breastfeeding is allowed, may cause more problems for mothers who wish to feed where needed and don't wish to be shut away

Surely we should be pushing the law to protect all mothers from feeding their babies in any safe location. My rule of thumb if a baby can be safely bottle fed somewhere, it follows that this is also a suitable place to breastfeed.

mamight it is a difficult trick to master!

I have always wondered what was so offensive about the back of a baby's head. Apart from the couple of seconds where you might have been able to catch a glimpse of a nipple that was all we really ever had on show.

lissyglitter-i don't think making bloody cocktails out of breastmilk is doing anything to normalise breastfeeding or women who do so.
I also hope you inform the people before they sample the drinks that you've put your breastmilk in it-i wouldn't be happy. But i am like that you see,no sense of humour.

Babieseverywhere - I totally get where you coming from. But while breastfeedingg for longer than a few days remains in the minority, then I think those stickers are a necessary evil, especially for those mums who lack confidence in feeding in public.

Definitely think they need something other than "breastfeeding friendly" though because of the reasons you stated - I do like Theyoungvisitors idea of "supporting bfing everywhere".

When Ds was first born, I was petrified of bfing in public, and the first few times intentionally looked for somewhere private. But as the weeks went past and I grew more and more confident and relaxed about it, I breastfed in more and more public places. I too like to think I do my bit to make the point that it is a perfectly normal thing to breastfeed a baby or a toddler!

It depends what the scheme is trying to do, I think. There's a difference between 'permitting' bf and making bf mothers welcome and comfortable. If being part of such a scheme meant providing drinking water, giving your staff training etc. then it might be very worthwhile.

I suppose the thing is that BFing is (unfortunately) something that a minority of mothers do and while normalising it would obviously be good thing, I wonder about taking such a specific approach.

A baby friendly sticker would be much more inclusive, inviting fathers as well as other carers onto the premises, not making FFers feel that maybe the place "isn't for them" etc.

Baby friendly sticker is much more useful as well - as someone said earlier it would mean highchairs, changing facilities etc etc

Maybe someone should tell them our decision

I really like the idea of a sticker saying 'supporting bfing everywhere' - I think that's the message that should be put across. I don't mind bfing in public at all, and have done so a bit already with 7wk old DS2. The first few times I felt quite vulnerable as I was quite fumbly and didn't want to be shouted at as well as get my latch right Now I'm much more comfortable with dealing with any confrontation (haven't had to) but still a bit likely to fling my whole boob out when trying to sort out all my layers I know this isn't a huge issue but it's embarrassing to me so am happier in places where I'm not going to be stared at in the manner of a two headed monster.

when i was at my last church, my friend had a baby and would feed her whenever she needed it: and sometimes that meant whilst in the choir-stalls: so, beat that, my friend breast-fed in church (in front of the congregation too, cos the choir-stalls are at the front)

Feeding in church?

Been there done that :D

Interesting thread. Another factor is location and class. Where I live, hardly anyone BF in public, it is an utter rarity.

In large cities with large middle class populations, many more women do in certain bits.

So those of us that live in BF deserts need something to normalise it because there just isn't the volume of BF (yet).

Church is an excellent time for breastfeeding IME. You are sitting quietly, baby can take as long as they like, I didn't always stand up for the songs though.

Thats true Morloth. You can sit and relax whilst everyone else is leaping up and down (I'm Catholic. There is so much up and down its like an aerobic class). I always think I'm going to drop the wafer though so i try and wrestle ds off before communion.

I like the idea of whoever it was earlier on the thread that said "baby-friendly" stickers would be better - if you are offended by (whisper) breastfeeding you know you probably have a 50-50 chance of someone feeding their baby in a baby-friendly place. By making specific "breastfeeding" areas it gives it as much of a stigma as being a smoker!

I never even looked for the stickers, but was on my 3rd baby this time. With DD2, I went to the "baby rooms" - boring time in dull white rooms on my own in the back of a shop, waiting for her to finish. Or else sat watching other people changing smelly bums and wanting to gag. This time round, I would frequently feed DD3 on (non rush-hour) trains to London - usually meant I got a double seat to myself - no one ever commented, I was really lucky, I'd just get the occasional older lady who would say how content DD looked. I practised at home first on which tops to wear so no risk of boob display, usually had a lightweight long loose cardi to cover any midriff flashes.

I like the "supporting breastfeeding everywhere" slogan and really like the idea of providing cards with your rights on (where did that excellent quote come from upthread?)

At one of my antenatal appointments I was given a credit-card-sized fridge magnet and a key fob with numbers of bf helplines, which was a great idea - shame they didn't mention they were run by volunteers not the NHS and to expect an answerphone. A card with rights to add to my wallet would have really made me more comfortable during the first couple months.

I don't like the idea of linking bf-welcome to requiring high chairs and all sorts of other stuff because it suggests bf happens in 'children-friendly' places, rather than absolutely anywhere. I did most of my public feeding in a local bar/cafe with some comfy leather sofas - they have no space or desire for high chairs but really welcome groups of mums during the day. They have squeezed a change table in one loo cubicle which is fab.

I know I've posted before, and I may be repeating myself, but the more I think about this, the more I think that, actually, the law states that BFing can take place everywhere, so by finding out friendly places to display any sticker is counter-productive, when anyone should feed their baby wherever they damn well please. - and surely that should be the message to spread, not that bfing mothers can go to Cozy Caff down the High Street, cos they're happy for you to get your baps out .

I work as security in a mall with a food court and do occasionally get a radio message from our cleaning staff that someone has complained about someone BF. I do at this point go to the person complaining and ask why they are concerned by someone elses child eating in the food court. this is usually greeted by "can they not feed them in he baby changing", which my standard reply is "would you like me to move your table to within the toilets."

So there is never any hassel for the BF mums in my mall.

however I did once ask a woman to cover herself up slightly, cause she was gathering a small crowd of teenage boys and she seemed to like the attention.

Would it be like those blue wheelchair stickers that show somewhere is wheelchair-accessible? I don't understand what the BF sticker would actually MEAN - I guess if somewhere has been adapted to make it accessible for wheelchairs the sticker is actually giving some real information you might not know from looking at the venue from the outside. But the BF sticker would be saying... what exactly? You won't be asked to leave? I have rarely heard of someone being asked to leave by the manager / staff of cafes etc anyhow, the person who usually complains is some grumpy sod in the corner, another customer - and as it's been pointed out, it's illegal to ask someone to leave for BFing anyhow. The sticker isn't SAYING anything, as far as I can see.