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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not like my friend's son urinating in public?

121 replies

Isitjustmeor · 19/10/2009 19:47

A close of friend of mine has a son who will be three in a few months. We often go out all together, usually to the park, to let our children run off some energy.
I know children get caught short (and grown-ups too, in alleyways behind BiteofFun's house) and have accidents, but I feel really awkward when my friend's son just pulls his trousers and pants down and urinates wherever he is. My friend doesn't say anything about it.
When it happened last week, a family who were also playing in the part looked horrified and hurried their children away and left.
Should I say something?

OP posts:
francaghostohollywood · 19/10/2009 21:07

Oh let small children piss wherever they need I say. Children's pee is probably one of the last thing that bothers me...

pigletmania · 19/10/2009 21:10

thanks fourarms will try that once she is able to tell me she needs a wee or poo still got a while to go though i think

Hando · 19/10/2009 21:13

Javier bardem - Errr.... get a grip.

You know full well that my post wasn't meant to be taken that way, you are twisting my words.

I was honestly saying perhaps in some countries (both these women were African (I think) and sounded like they were speaking French) it is generally accepted that it is ok for kids to pee wherever they like, including ones own front lawn! Perhaps they are not aware that it is socially unacceptable her in the Uk to do that sort of thing.

No heil hitlers over in my corner!

spookyrookie · 19/10/2009 21:23

Mysticmasseuse it was about 20 years ago since I was in Belgium. I have seen some interesting sights on the street of my home town including one bloke pissing with one hand and eating his chips with the other, bleugh.

TheMysticMasseuse · 19/10/2009 21:24

lovely i'll keep this image with me forever

pigletmania · 19/10/2009 21:26

Eeer ewwwww these uncivilised men would hate to have a chip from him

TheMysticMasseuse · 19/10/2009 21:30

But, Hando, i don't think it's that universally unacceptable as this thread demonstrates...

francaghostohollywood · 19/10/2009 21:34

I don't actually think that the fact that lots of drunks pee on the streets is necessarily linked to small children being allowed to pee in the park.

SolidGhoulBrass · 19/10/2009 21:50

MillyR what a thoroughly creepy attitude and a misguided one. Newborn babies have sexual/sensual feelings, as do plenty of toddlers, and being naked is not disgusting. Excreting everywhere at random is not always great on hygiene grounds, but the odd widdle in the bushes does no harm.

Bubbaluv · 19/10/2009 22:07

Isn't urine sterile anyway? Rules out hygiene arguments surely?
I have to say I house trained my DS before I potty trained him. Aiming at daisies in the lawn was a great motivator!

lyndysue · 19/10/2009 22:19

My H had a habit of letting our DS going anywhere he wanted (DD was expected to hold on as he couldn't cope with the mechanics of little girls weeing in public). It used to drive me mad but particularly horrible was when he came to pick me up from work (where we have toilets!) and I saw DS peeing up against the wheel of our car in the car park in full view of the office!! H couldn't be bothered to come in and find the toilet for him....

edam · 19/10/2009 22:33

at least it was your car!

JavierBardem · 19/10/2009 22:40

Get a grip? me?

please, you are getting your knickers in a twist about children pee! Are you offended at the sight of a child's willy as well? How can one be disgusted at somehting so innocent?

corblimeymadam · 19/10/2009 22:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Tryharder · 19/10/2009 22:45

Someone made an earlier point that was very interesting.

We, in this country, do not have any problem with dogs urinating and crapping over our pavements/parks/public footpaths/fields but God help any mother that allows her toddler to pee against a tree rather than wet himself.

Priorities?

corblimeymadam · 19/10/2009 22:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Hando · 19/10/2009 23:34

please, you are getting your knickers in a twist about children pee! Are you offended at the sight of a child's willy as well? How can one be disgusted at somehting so innocent?

Did you actually read my post? I said objected to people letting their kids pee in the middle of a footpath, or in shared front gardens for no reason. I also siad ther eis no problem with kids peeing in the bushes or out of the way at the park. Of course I'm not offended or disgusted by the sight of a child peeing! I think you need to read what others post before making silly comments!

Hando · 19/10/2009 23:36

That was to Javierbardem by the way.

Also, I definitely do havwe a problem with dogs peeing and pooping everywhere. Kids should pee out of the way if they need to go and can't hold it, behind a bush etc - not right where you are about to walk or where you want to sit by the swings to have your picnic!

Hando · 19/10/2009 23:39

Belgian, no hole is being dug, you are inventing a problem that is not there!

I do have a perfectly valid point that would make for a good discussion. I'd be interested if anyone on here lives overseas and perhaps they may be able to tell us if kids peeing where they stand (meaning not taken to one side or behind the bush etc) is acceptable and generally practised by most parents.

BiteOfFun · 19/10/2009 23:53

I think part of toilet training is teaching reasonable discretion, not just random tinkling. I understand that toddlers have to go quickly,but they should be moved somewhere at least slightly shielded from public view.

nappyaddict · 20/10/2009 01:43

If it's somewhere discreet YABU. If he is just dropping his trousers and weeing where ever YANBU.

anonymous85 · 20/10/2009 05:49

My friends DS does this and he is 4 and 5 months, so gross and DD always asks why is he weeing in the yard and once she started to pull down her own pants to do a wee too

Not impressed. I don't think it's right to go letting them wee and shit anywhere outside unless it's a desperate need to or out camping. I also think what if they were to flop it out and do it at childcare/preschool [shcok]

Something I wont be allowing if we ever have a DS

ChilloHippi · 20/10/2009 09:14

NappyAddict has put my feelings on the matter succinctly.

facebookaddict · 20/10/2009 09:14

Where did OP go? is he/she interested in ongoing debate at all?

pigletmania · 20/10/2009 09:17

Of course in an emergency whether its boys or girls they still need to wee asap, and somewhere like behind a tree or bush if possible even if i have to carry them there. IMO if kids are allowed to wee anywhere in situ than what are you teaching them for the future, they will find it acceptable to do this at school, at somebodies house or if they are walking along when they get older. Oh talking about my friend and her 2.10 year old son weeing alfresco, she was taking her dd to school and was in the playground, her ds just pulled down his pants and weed on the playground and looked quite proud of it lol.