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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be cross about this birthday card for my 1 year old?

196 replies

MiffedAndPeeved · 30/09/2009 15:36

Long story short, and receive a card for our first baby's birthday from a friend I haven't seen since he was born (we live at opposite ends of the country now) and she visited us. We've kept in touch on facebook, swapped photos etc, but she hardly knows the little man and how good a baby he has been for us.

The card is one of those customised mock-ups of a magazine cover, similar to OK etc. My "friend" has used photos I've sent her over the last twelve months to make it look like he is some sort of mini- George Best type, and it has really irked me for some reason.

Example- one photo shoes him covered in food, and the headline reads "That Banana Incident- XXX's full confession" . Then there is the one of me and dh looking knackered holding him, captioned "The Parents' Story- Our Nightly Hell" . Worse, they're is one of me holding him after birth with the headline "Bloodied But Unbowed- Once More Unto The Breech?"

My friend knows it is early days into my pregnancy with dc2, but I haven't told everyone yet. What's more, it feels like it's sort of wishing a difficult birth onto me IYSWIM?

If she comes her for the birthday party, which she has intimated she might, she'll expect to see it on the mantelpiece, but A) I don't want everyone to know I'm pregnant again, and B)It makes us look like we had a terrible time with ds, and he's a little darling, an angel compared to most. Do you think she's transferring her own experience of babies onto us? It feels like it!

So, am I being unreasonable to think she is being crass and insensitive? Should I try and fob her off about the party? I don't know how the card is going to go down with my mother especially, particularly the Banana bit.

OP posts:
wannaBe · 30/09/2009 16:16

sorry hully but you've been rumbled.

Nowhere does it say that the card had a photo which made the baby look like it had a banana head.

thisisyesterday · 30/09/2009 16:17

you['re right hully. i repent, i am so sorry! i hadn't realised the gravity of the situation. never again will i mention bananas to anyone with a small child.
it's so incredibly rude.
or to my mother,.

oh no

is this you miffed? and your friend in the green?

hullygully · 30/09/2009 16:17

Unless I have magic double computer fingers and can post seconds apart. I forgot that. take no notice Miffed, I never have time for sex jokes, particularly not about my dc and bananas. Vulgar.

hullygully · 30/09/2009 16:18

wannabe - do try harder.

OrangeFish · 30/09/2009 16:18

That was for Hully by the way...

Miffed, if somebody is willing to travel accross the country to celebrate your baby's birthday, it will be stupid to ruin such relationship over a mischosen card incident.

There are no many friends like that, you know?

thisisyesterday · 30/09/2009 16:19

m,iffed- implying that your child got banana on himself is in no way an innuendo!
seriousky

hocuspontas · 30/09/2009 16:19

Do you mean that she had a choice of photos with different fruit all over him and she chose the banana one to get at you? What a cow

Stigaloid · 30/09/2009 16:19

YABU - sounds like her sense of humour is not mixing with your pregnancy hormones but doesn't come across as malicious. Am pregnant with DC2 as well and very hormonal so big hugs and empathy for you, but i don't think it needs to be blown out of proportion.

Congrats on your DC1's first b'day

waitingforbedtime · 30/09/2009 16:21

YABVU if this is true but I dont think it is. If it is, I find the use of the term 'good' to describe a baby more offensive than any banana jokes tbh.

hullygully · 30/09/2009 16:21

I AM NOT THE FRIGGING OP.

Sorry, Miffed. You're on your own.

wannaBe · 30/09/2009 16:22

lol how do people come up with these posts..

overmydeadbody · 30/09/2009 16:22

You're reading way too much into a birthdaycard. For goodness sake, stop letting your hormones control you

Your friend was trying to be funny. Don't let it ruin a friendship.

MrsMerryHenry · 30/09/2009 16:23

OMG you actually think the banana was meant as a sexual innuendo???

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

I'm sorry, but that is the funniest thing I've heard. Why don't you stop whining about it and just call your friend to ask her if that's what she intended? Better still, email her a link to this thread - then see how long your friendship lasts!!

ROFL and PMSL and LMAO!!!

BitOfFun · 30/09/2009 16:25

Sorry guys

I haven't done one of these for ages...

I do actually want to send one of these card to someone though- I though this might gauge whether it was in really poor taste or not? Apparently I'm ok to go with the banana then?

ILoveStripeySocks · 30/09/2009 16:26

I know wannabe, it boggles the mind!

BitOfFun · 30/09/2009 16:27

BlushBlushGrin

ILoveStripeySocks · 30/09/2009 16:27

BOF there were still a few that seemed genuinely offended

and pick the best photos!

RealityIsAnAuntie · 30/09/2009 16:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

hullygully · 30/09/2009 16:27

See? Apologise at once.

BoF - marvellous. The parrot was superb. Have you considered papaya?

BitOfFun · 30/09/2009 16:28

I love mumsnet though- I love the way some people enquired thoughtfully after my mental health as well as thinking I was being a twat: you are all fantastic

hf128219 · 30/09/2009 16:28

Very good BoF!

wannaBe · 30/09/2009 16:28

lol.

I think a card like that would be amusing.

motheringheights · 30/09/2009 16:28

So you're upset because the card shows that your friend hasn't realised that your son is better looking and better behaved than other children?

Perhaps you should send her better photos in the future.

SausageRocket · 30/09/2009 16:28

do you carry a pomander, OP ?

becstarlitsea · 30/09/2009 16:28

So you think that your friend was making a sexual innuendo about your one year old, and the thing that really, really offended you about that was that she used an unflattering picture to do it?

And that the whole thing was motivated by jealousy because she wants your perfect special baby who is far more loveable than anybody else's baby?

And that other people might think that you have lost sleep or your baby might not be perfect if they see the card?