To be cross about this birthday card for my 1 year old?

[MiffedAndPeeved]

Long story short, and receive a card for our first baby's birthday from a friend I haven't seen since he was born (we live at opposite ends of the country now) and she visited us. We've kept in touch on facebook, swapped photos etc, but she hardly knows the little man and how good a baby he has been for us.

The card is one of those customised mock-ups of a magazine cover, similar to OK etc. My "friend" has used photos I've sent her over the last twelve months to make it look like he is some sort of mini- George Best type, and it has really irked me for some reason.

Example- one photo shoes him covered in food, and the headline reads "That Banana Incident- XXX's full confession" . Then there is the one of me and dh looking knackered holding him, captioned "The Parents' Story- Our Nightly Hell" . Worse, they're is one of me holding him after birth with the headline "Bloodied But Unbowed- Once More Unto The Breech?"

My friend knows it is early days into my pregnancy with dc2, but I haven't told everyone yet. What's more, it feels like it's sort of wishing a difficult birth onto me IYSWIM?

If she comes her for the birthday party, which she has intimated she might, she'll expect to see it on the mantelpiece, but A) I don't want everyone to know I'm pregnant again, and B)It makes us look like we had a terrible time with ds, and he's a little darling, an angel compared to most. Do you think she's transferring her own experience of babies onto us? It feels like it!

So, am I being unreasonable to think she is being crass and insensitive? Should I try and fob her off about the party? I don't know how the card is going to go down with my mother especially, particularly the Banana bit.

I dont think anyone will get any impression about your son from a birthday card! You are starting to sound a bit weird about it all - are you sure there isnt something else to all this?

You sound really defensive about the joke that you were going through "hell". Are you going through a bad time? This really is just a bit of fun you know. Still don't know what you mean about your Mother and the Banana card...?

What's my relationship got to do with anything? I did tell her we weren't having sex again yet- do you think that's what the "Hell" implies?

Hang on a minute, now you're saying the photos aren't flattering but in your OP you say she's used photos you've sent her yourself. Why on earth did you send them to her if you don't like them?

Oh, get over it! It's a JOKE.

You are certainly over thinking the "banana incident" as I assumed it was just because he was covered in banana. I also never twigged from the card description that you were pregnant.

She's not implying he's been a horrid baby or that you've been through hell with him.

She's just made a joke about the hardships of parenthood and made a personalised card for you.

I think you are taking it far too seriously and reading too much into it.

Moonpig have cards liek this already mocked up - you just add photos. Perhaps that is what she did? read the card, found it amusing, added your photos and thought you would laugh along?

"I did tell her we weren't having sex again yet"

then how the hell are you pregnant??

OK now you are just sounding weird

Miffed, I meant your relationship with her! Though I am beginning to wonder if this is real now ....

Well, a few times, Soupdragon, just not "back to normal" IYSWIM.

Riiight.

I believe none of this.

Does nobody else find the banana thing rude then?

Sorry for mis-interpreting the relationship thing . It's on my mind, I suppose.

and you know she probably didn't ake the "headlines" up

it's prob a template and you just add some pictures.

really, get a grip!

of course it's not rude

Does she have DC? She may think all babies are a nightmare - many people do. (And let's be honest, many babies are, though it's not their fault...) Or has she had difficult babies herself? I can understand why you don't like the card but I don't think for a second she was trying to make a dig at you. She just thinks this is your experience and she would give you a laugh.

Why on earth would you find the banana thing rude? Is it not about him being covered in banana, or have I missed something?

I don't see what's rude about the banana... the idea is the baby just splatted banana all over himself isn't it? (Although I do understand that in RL he didn't!)

Super idea!

I have friends with a sense of humour that would love this

Oh no - he did! (sorry getting confused)

It depends on how well you know her and how close she is to you. If i was to get a card like this from a non close friend / associate i'd laugh along in a 'harhar isn't motherhood tough' kind of way but tbh (and going against the grain here) if say my Mum or best friend sent me a card with unflattering piccies of my DS and making out he was more of a PITA than he actually was it would wind me up too. I'd either think they were jealous of him or that they had thought i'd moaned too much.

no. It's not rude.

Kids are messy! Babies are noisy! Parents are knackered.

It's funny!

I think that if you are feeling like this about it, then you need to take a look and see if something else is going on.

Are you feeling ok generally?

nice try.

Think YABU and a little bit precious about your DC. She's obviously taken a bit of time to mock up card and send to you, actually, thinking about YABVU and neurotic. (Although accept that this may be down to hormones!!)

Gosh IMo you are being a bit unreasonable, its a joke, tongue in cheek, stop worring about it and ejoy your ds. Yes the cards are not to my taste but i would have just smiled at them and put them away somewhere or throw them in the bin.