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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want to go out for a meal on a sunday night with ds?

27 replies

chachachachacha · 22/09/2009 19:36

It's mil's 65th birthday next sunday. Family want to go out for a meal on the sunday night.

DS has just started school doing full days and is finding it really exhausting. The last thing I want to do is for him to have a late night on a sunday. The restaurant will be atleast half an hour drive away.

AIBU in not wanting to go?

OP posts:
rubyslippers · 22/09/2009 19:38

YABU

it is a special occasion

he will sleep on the way there maybe?

diddl · 22/09/2009 19:38

I´d be loathe to go out when it´s school the next morning.

Could it be changed to lunch?
Are their other children going?

nickytwotimes · 22/09/2009 19:39

Well, 65th is a big one, so I would take him and let him have a morning or day off.

pjmama · 22/09/2009 19:39

How late will it be? If it's a teatime thing, then going to bed an hour or two late probably won't do any harm - brush his teeth and put his PJs on before you leave then he can go straight to bed when you get home. If it's been arranged as a proper evening meal, then I wouldn't see that as been appropriate for young children anyway. Could you get a sitter?

Original poster
chachachachacha · 22/09/2009 19:42

Tis tricky - no other children will be there

We wouldn't be home til about 10ish.

MIL will want to see him so sitter wouldn't really be an option. Although I suppose we could look into it.

Can't let him have the morning off as we're working.

OP posts:
diddl · 22/09/2009 19:43

Yes, if it´s an evening meal I wouldn´t think about taking a child who has school the next day, I´d be looking for a sitter.

CarGirl · 22/09/2009 19:44

No I wouldn't take him, I'd book a sitter.

pjmama · 22/09/2009 19:45

If they want to see him, ask them if they can bring it forward to teatime or lunchtime. 10pm for a four year old is a bit unfair, especially if he's the only child. He'll be tired and probably very bored.

BitOfFun · 22/09/2009 19:47

Daft to expect a four year old to attend.

diddl · 22/09/2009 19:48

Sorry to your MIL, but I´d get a sitter.

Can he see her in the day to say "Happy Birthday".

And if she´s got her family there, seriously, how much time will she have for him?

And at a restaurant in the evening, is there much he can do other than sit at the table?

Might not be enjoyable for him.

sunburntats · 22/09/2009 19:48

I wouldnt go.

But then i dont have any one to babysit for me. Its too late on a scool night.

Against the grain, but no, i wouldnt do it.

How about you inviting them to yours for dinner the saterday before? Put on a bit of a buffet with baloons and stuff instead of going?

sunburntats · 22/09/2009 19:49

jeex spelling appauling, sorry im SO tired

diddl · 22/09/2009 19:51

If you can´t get a sitter, yould it be acceptable for just hubby to go?

movingnow · 22/09/2009 19:51

YANBU - I definitely wouldn't take a child with school the next day. To be honest can't think of anything worse than going out on a Sunday evening, much rather be at home preparing for the week etc (yes, boring I know).

diddl · 22/09/2009 19:54

Well, for me Sunday evening wouldn´t be my fave time to go out either.
Work next day/getting children ready for school.

Rather lunch or early evening.

bigchris · 22/09/2009 19:54

if its only half an hour away she can come round to yours , give him a kiss good night and give your dh a lift!!

MiniMarmite · 22/09/2009 19:56

If she really wants him there she should have made it a lunch time!

bruces · 22/09/2009 20:02

That's far too late for a little one to be up on a school night,my 4yr old goes to bed at7pm and my 9 yr old 8pm, a lunch time meal is a nicer idea even for the adults who probably have to go to work on monday.

mollymawk · 22/09/2009 20:08

I wouldn't enjoy taking my 4 yo DS out for a meal until 9.30 pm on any night TBH. Sounds like a nightmare.

curiositykilled · 22/09/2009 20:10

Couldn't they make it earlier or on saturday. I wouldn't want to take my DS when he's tired anyway just from being at school.

jazzandh · 22/09/2009 20:59

Should be a lunchtime on a Sunday anyway. No-one wants to go out on a Sunday night...

If you HAVE to go - have you an old buggy, that perhaps he can nod off in when he's tired?

Original poster
chachachachacha · 23/09/2009 07:54

Thanks everyone - just wanted to see if I really was bu!

Have proposed moving it to another date but they want it to be on the actual birthday.

OP posts:
brettgirl2 · 23/09/2009 08:21

I'd just say you and dh would love to go but too late for ds on a school night. End of. She then has to decide what is most important - dinner in the evening on her birthday or gc there. It's simple, if he's just started school it's not fair on him.

She sounds pretty selfish to me.

diddl · 23/09/2009 08:58

I wouldn´t take him.

And if she mentions he could take the day off school-I wonder if she would have done that!!

Is she the one organising it, though?

Original poster
chachachachacha · 23/09/2009 10:28

she's not organising it - sil is and has no children so doesn't really understand my concerns around a sunday night.

OP posts:
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