to think that 'counselling' in any of its myriad guises is by and large a bloody waste of time?

[moondog]

At best a self-indulgence, at worst positively damaging.

STEP 1 - I had counselling. This helped me to figure out my problems, why I did what I did and therefore enabled me to...
STEP 2 - ...do dummat about it.

Tis a two step process, y'see. There would be no point examining your behaviour if you did not change it accordingly afterwards.

Moondog I think you might have been very useful in the war. Perhaps working in some sort of factory or just collecting limbs while the rest of us sat weeping into hankerchiefs.

The problem with counselling research though is the ethical and practical problems which evaluation throws up- how do you match groups to be compared, for example? What if someone goes in for trouble sleeping for instance, but it emerges that the issue is actually childhood abuse? They can't be compared to someone on CBT learning to manage work stress. And how can you ethically design a study which doesn't offer what you believe should be the best fit treatment for that person? The research needs to be done, certainly, but it's one of those areas where "evidence-based" treatments are hard to assess in the first place.

I think a lot depends on the condition. For proper clinical depression then I agree that councelling is a total and utter waste of time. When someone is severely depressed without cause there is loads of research that shows that anti depressants work.

What is needed is careful management of anti depressants rather than having them handed out like smarties. There is no point is giving anti depressants to someone who is having a bad time. Sometimes its completely healthy to feel dispair when life is rotten. Reactive depression is different to clinical depression.

However I can see that for someone going through a lot of stress that a listening ear can be useful. Not everyone is lucky enough to have friends who will keep confidentality.

oo llama, you sound like a woman with knowledge

Moondog, your OP is like saying 'AIBU to think modern medicine is a complete and utter waste of time?'

Don't let a few bad apples taint the whole profession. You have to choose your counsellors and therapists extremely carefully. Even clinically-trained psychologists/ psychiatrists can do a lot of harm. If at all possible, go with a personal recommendation - ask around, there's always someone who knows someone. You don't have to say it's for yourself.

Very good point BoF (although research into ACT is promising and I do know a good bit about that, although not had it myself.)

I tell you what though, there are a great many issues that could be cleared up by a bit of exercise, good food, hard work, altruisitc acts and laying off the booze.

I think the OP exaggerates a bit, but I do think that there are people who believe that counselling is the solution to everything, & equally that there is nothing can't be solved with counselling, & I think that overstates the case.

(Speaking from personal experience having a close friend who had done counselling training & subsequently hounded me whenever anything remotely personal came up to talk it through to her )

onepieceoflollipop you are absolutely welcome, I hope everything works out with your SIL and you're feeling a bit less worried now.

A man with a tabla has about three months before he runs off with someone 20 years younger than him.

God yes.I was once 'offered counselling' in a work related situation. I pointed out that if the people who were paid to do their job actually did it properly, I wouldn't be in a situation of such tension that merited an irritating do-gooder suggesting it.

Maybe not at the time but then when you find out you're related and that wierd, not-right feeling you had about them was for good reason.....

Aye.
I introduced my friend to him very cleverly by rising and saying 'Please don't let me keep you all to myself.You must meet my dear friend Tabitha' and then swiftly changed seats with her, pushing her in his direction.

She lasted 20 mins. before coming back to me and muttering 'OMG, what a fucking knob.'

Agree that counselling is hugely over-reccommended.
And that people seem to see it as the most amazing panacea.
A madman has just gunned down half a school. It's OK, trained counsellors are on the scene. Small child loses thier entire family in tragic car crash. Its OK, s/he's being offered counselling.
Thing is with this, is that we're raising a generation who will be completely incapable of dealing with any loss or trauma, or indeed any emotional upset at all, without a 'trained counsellor' on hand to guide us through it.

at the goatee-bearded tabla player.

I bet he had beads. Either around his neck or wrists.

I know that Sal.
I hate the term 'therapist'.

Hairymelons

A leather thong around his neck with something in an organic shpae hewn out of pewter on it. Also cheesecloth (but trendy) shirt.
Oh, and curly hair arranged just so.

Eeeew HM waht degree of kinship was there?

Yes Llama, that's it exactly.

'The 'trained counsellors' are in.'
So that's alright then.
What a crock.

"we're raising a generation who will be completely incapable of dealing with any loss or trauma, or indeed any emotional upset at all, without a 'trained counsellor' on hand to guide us through it."

This is nonsense. (a) counselling is simply NOT that widely available and is never going to be and (b) how is that worse than stuffing your emotions into a box at the back of your head and not dealing with it?

Computational CBT sounds promising. It is impossible to bore a computer to death.

I think the danger of councelling is becoming emotionally dependent on a paid person. I also think that people will go to councelling to avoid taking proper treatment for mental illness.

"I tell you what though, there are a great many issues that could be cleared up by a bit of exercise, good food, hard work, altruisitc acts and laying off the booze. "

If someone is truely mentally ill they may not be able to do these things. Sometimes people with severe depression completely lose their apperite and then get caught in a downward spiral.

Mental illness can strike at random. It can affect hard working people as well as lazy people. It can affect people from all walks of life including speech and language therapists.

oh of course, leather stringy things.

If I'd had counselling at the age of 20 I wouldn't have shagged so many of that type.

Counselling at the point of a crisis is generally considered to have better longer-term outcomes than waiting for a long period (ask anyone with post-tramatic shock)