My dd wont go anywhere daily where she will be loved as much as I love her....thats not going to happen is it :( ok so how do i deal with this?

[yummyummy]

Here goes....
DD born 05, started school sept 3rd 2009. (her schools hrs are 9am-12noon everyday until 21st sept then will be 9am-3pm) She has never been babysat or looked after by any1 but me or dh, apart from nursery staff from when she was 2 yr's old. Even that was only 4 hour a wk (2hr on mon, 2 hr on fri)

Today (day 5 of her schooling) we have an interview about dd, as does every parent at her school in reception regards their child. DH and I are asked lots of questions. Who are her friends, what names has she mentioned, what does DD enjoy to do at home, can she dress herself, do up her shoes, whats her favorite food, disliked food, does she have any allergies? (bit late for that question isnt it on day 5????!!!!!!) etc etc.

It then dawns on me I leave my child with strangers in a class of 30 other children everyday

Prior to this she has been with me and only a much loved nursery for 4 hours a wk.

Don't grill me please, yes I knew school would be hard for us both. But surely in this day and age with the things we read about young children god forbid, dont we as parents need to know our children are going somewhere to be protected and looked after?? Isn't there an easier way to break our (urm...ME and MY!) children into school?

fgs just wearing a stiff ironed shirt and a tie is a major thing for a little girl. every day. shes only used to princess dresses!!!!

Am I too overprotective with nothing else better to worry about?? DD has had 2 morning starter nsessions in june prior to starting school to 'familiarise' herself....PAH!!

I guess I need to know she is going somewhere everyday where she will be loved as much as me & DH love her....thats not going to happen is it What a sudden brick wall we have just hit

Just wait until they are nearly 19 and going off to Uni next week. Now that IS a milestone. I am so excited for my DS and he is out of the house more than he is in it atm but I know I will cry. Out of sight of him of course!!

'she is growing into someone that I can reasonably confidently send into the world at 19.'

Yup. This is what it's about: not exams and qualification, etc, but producing someone who can deal with the world. And more importantly, relish it.

at Cory

Independent is precious isn't it. I am glad your DD will get some.I do the same as you - try and focus on the can do's rather than the can'ts.
And these things are all relative - DS1 is washing himself and cleaning his teeth without prompting every morning. And even asked where his "e-o-dodorant" was .
I had a drink to celebrate that one.

Clary no I wasnt directing anything at you- im not that clever to be discreet lol.

You can't love your children too much. But you don't have to have them sat on your lap to love them.

You can love them from the other side of the world. They can still be loved when they are not with you.

I send my children to their dad's every Friday night. I don't 'stop loving them' until Saturday. And the fact that he's their dad is neither here nor there, I am pretty sure he doesn't love them as much as I do.

Also, Op, you mention NO difficulties on your daughter's part, only yours.

Let her be a little girl who is the same as all the other little girls in her class - don't think for a second that you love her anymore than the other parents love theirs. You do sound rather over-reliant on her for a sense of purpose in your life - don't make her over reliant on you in return.

It's our job as parents to prepare our children for the outside world as best we can - not to ensure that they always, metaphorically, fit on our lap. Let her grow up. One day she will be too big for you to cling to - don't make her have to push you away before you will let her go.

Colditz thats very apt.

no worries then nickschick

gosh so manys posts I Cant believe it havent been able 2 check until tonight had problems with broadband. thats so typical I hardly ever post and this happens when I do.

Media plant lol! Sorry nothing that glamourous sounding!! Just a mum after a glass of wine got a bit emotional over her DD starting school. We havent cosseted her my goodness, our family situation doesnt give us the options of many babysitters, we are not sad people stuck in all the time, we are always out and about we have a holiday home nr the coast and thats the way we choose to spend going out most weekends unless DD has parties/clubs etc. DD is a normal grounded, level headed 4 yr old. With lots of independance. She loves going out and about, loves her independance, has just learned to ride her bike with no stabilisers, I cant imagine she would be able to do this if she was mollycoddled or wrapped in cotton wool. She has a great network of friends and also makes new friends easily. She is loving school etc etc.

I had wobbley moment, my son (2) is very demanding during the day (&night, pretty much all the time!), and I havent really had time to think about everything school brought with it literally until pretty much the day she went. It was a sudden moment of realisation that my goodness things are going to be changing. That brought a lot of emotions out all at once, may sound like I have some unhealthy love for my child, but its not like that. Of course i dont want school to love her like me when I think about it, and I can understand why that sounds weird when iread it again.

anniemac your quote helped me get things into persepctive and remind me of what I already knew, so that was lovely and helpful thank you. I have in fact bought the book today after goolging a few online pages before going to my mums for sunday din, I read a few bits online and thought there were some great pieces in it on all aspects of life so thanks for that.

MIAonline thanks for your post too, you have pretty much hit the nail on the head

"for example the comparison of wearing princess dresses with a shirt and tie. I really didn't think the Op meant it literally, I took it that the OP was trying to demonstrate how it was a massive leap in to new territory..."

that perfectly explains where I am at, so thanks for that for restoring my faith some people understood after reading some posts regarding my daughter being cosseted in an unhealthy way (quite offensive tbh) I have found it a massive leap, and DD is so far doing fab at school and loving her new teacher, classroom and little friends.

When I had my DD I thought she would stay a baby for ages, I am always amazed how quickly they grow into their own little person. Yes school is the best thing for her now, socially and developmentally. Doesn't stop me having this little sad feeling in my tum thou

YummyYummy you have every right to have to have that feeling most parents do, dont worry she will be ok. My dd 2.6 is starting nursery for one day a week and i am a bit anxious, its a great nursery and she will benefit immensley from it, wish that i could afford more days. I am sure that your dd will be absolutely fine dont worry.