to be incredibly irritated by the term 'lady' partuculalry when used by one woman about another.

[moondog]

So faux genteel.
It's woman.
Ok?

I would love to have one term to refer to women, as men have one term for men.

However i don;t want to upset anyone and in our society, saying "woman" when referring to random women out and about, would offend a lot of women, and so I use lady. Societal norms and all that.

I'd expect someone introducing at a conference or performance or wedding or something to say "Ladies and gentlemen..." It would sound so odd to say "Men and women..."

Depends on context, as ever.

A woman saying it about another woman is a bit weird.

A woman teaching her child some respect to the person the child has nearly knocked over "Mind the lady" doesn't bother me.

On the whole though, it's not something which gets my goat. Even though I don't have a goat. But you know what I mean.

Addressing an audience as "Men and women" reminds me of those 1970s policitical / unions conferences my parents dragged me to. Usually with banners and a march.

LToS, I agree. As much as I hate the word I will use it in situations where I feel an alternative will cause unnecessary offence.

Are deep cultural inhibitions necessarily a bad thing that must be overcome?

Yes, how about just calling everyone "Comrade?"

UQD

Jemart, sometimes.

My boss (male, middle class) has a habit of calling the women in the office "girls".

It's deeply cultural for him, he doesn't realise it's a problem. I find it quite patronising though.

at Comrade.

Oh god

Custardo, I didn't mean to suggest that there's anything wrong with the word 'woman', though I can see that my post reads like that, but that the word gathered derogatory connotations and tended to be replaced with euphemisms (with their own connotations).

Incidentally, the terms of choice used by some 11-13 year-old boys to the girls on a sports course attended by my DD this summer were 'slag' and 'bitch'. There's connotations for you (yes, I did mention it to the organizers).

I always address a mixed group as "guys"

Is that OK? If so, why? If not, why not?

It's all very highly charged, this gender stuff, isn't it?

Certain nationalities are inclined to address me as 'Brother'. I think that is quite similar to 'Comrade'.

And of course 'Sisters are doing it for themselves'

Arg! If there's anything worse than lady it's calling grown women girls. Give me comrade any day

I had a conversation with various linguist friends a while back about languages I didn't know and what they did on the Mrs/Miss/Ms issue (having established what happened in the four I am familiar enough with). A friend who speaks Russian said they basically call one another a word equivalent to Comrade. I have no idea if this is totally right!

eeeew at "guys".

Trying too hard to be friendly and cool, IMHO. Which is fine with your friends, but you couldn't use it professionally.

So what word/s would be OK, MMOC?

Chaps & chappesses?

Comrade works for me too.

We have consensus!

I cop out and avoid any types of group terms.

I say "hello everyone".

I've never known anyone object to "everyone".

but again, back to the OP title, yes, "Lady" when used by one woman to another is weird.

but not "incredibly irritating"

Arf! @ComradeLToS

This whole debate is taking me back to my youth. It's rather enjoyable.

hmmm.

I work in a call centre. When I arrive everyone in my group is in headphones, in pods of 4, either on a call or waiting for one.

"Hello everyone" is so wishy-washy they wouldn't hear it.

"Hi guys!" is perfectly audible & seems to work

Well yes MMoC, unless presumably they actually are a Lady?

When manners dictate you use their actual title.

Hmmmm.

Hmm, I think I might try out "comrades" next time I have an opportunity... It might wind the boss up.

but then they would be Lady Spam of MN, for instance. Not just Lady. Or The Lady Spam.