to think that this isn't a joke at all its flirting, and totally inapropriate???

[isdhatwuntorisitme]

Ok saw Dh's phone and on it there is a text that he sends me when he plays golf.

"im playing golf today. it could only get any better if i were able to kiss you between the holes.

I think they call that the perimeum"

Only problem was that he had sent this text to a different female!!!!!
The cousin of someone he had tried to get with prior to us being together.

Now he thinks im over reacting, that this is just a joke and means nothing.
I am gutted and think that no its not at all funny its flirty and a bit naughty.

I will be very happy if you tell me im over reacting and bu but i just don't think iam.

and yes your answers will determine whether he stays here tonight so speedy responses welcome

Is OP coming back or what?

I want to know if she has whacked his balls with golf club.

And most importantly it's not funny. Isn't flirting better if it's witty and subtle? So if it was flirting it's rubbish. But it was a joke, it's rubbish. It's simply grim and totally inappropriate.

Yuk

If someone I wasn't actually in a relationship sent that to me I would be highly offended and assume they where after sex.

How horrible for you OP.

I agree with Hecate

either he is knobbing her or he is sexually harassing her

either way he sounds like a creep

have you got children with him?

Only read OP so gut reaction - my first feeling is you are hurt as it was a message just for you and it seems to have been diminished by sending it to someone else.

Your second issue is he is flirting with someone he has fancied before and that is not on.

dogshits, the OP has already said he admitted it wasn't an accidental sending of the text

I know, am feeling bad for the OP

I would love to take a baseball bat to this bloke's 'nads

ASk him how he would feel if it was sent to you by another man...

The person he sent the text to isn't the one he had fling with / fancied. Its her cousin i think.

Message withdrawn

Is anyone else wondering where OP is....?

Message withdrawn

Message withdrawn

Urgh vile! If it was a general joke about sex like a knob gag or something then I would still think it was a little inappropriate to send it to someone he's previously set his sights on but perhaps could over look it as a misjudgement but that 'joke' [puke emotion] is specifically about him wanting to perform a sex act on the recipiant. It's not ok and it's not innocent - I'd be inclined to shove his phone in any available hole.

YANBU - would not be at all happy.

No, MissSunny it is not.

If anyone sent me that I´d leave them!

Sorry been busy with kids etc.

No we don't have children together but he plays step dad to my 2.
Basically i have shown him this thread and your responses in an attempt to make him see that its not me being a bit mental and not seeing it for the hilarious joke he thinks it is, but that actually EVERYONE else thinks he is a cock.

he just keeps saying he hasn't cheated and that he never would.

I asked if she had replied and he said no. i asked him if he had wondered why and he said that he had sent it to her before and she didn't reply then either! like he thought that would make it better? not just one error of judgment but a series.

I think he has finally realised that its not funny and it is totally inapropriate but its been hard work.
I asked him if it was just a joke would he send it to his mum? or sister? or cousin? or wife of any of his friends?

dunno if it actually is finally sinking on or if he's just saying it for my benefit.

I almost want him to come on and argue with you lot and see what you thihnk.
Myu head is al over the place tbh.

Im not sure how we can go on as the trust is totally gone, but the thought of not being with him is awful.

i shall keep you posted