to think that this isn't a joke at all its flirting, and totally inapropriate???

[isdhatwuntorisitme]

Ok saw Dh's phone and on it there is a text that he sends me when he plays golf.

"im playing golf today. it could only get any better if i were able to kiss you between the holes.

I think they call that the perimeum"

Only problem was that he had sent this text to a different female!!!!!
The cousin of someone he had tried to get with prior to us being together.

Now he thinks im over reacting, that this is just a joke and means nothing.
I am gutted and think that no its not at all funny its flirty and a bit naughty.

I will be very happy if you tell me im over reacting and bu but i just don't think iam.

and yes your answers will determine whether he stays here tonight so speedy responses welcome

oh yes of course
I think I have been distracted by it's vileness - YANBU op this is not a text to send to another woman
not funny
though what woman would be impressed by a line like that who knows

He has deleted it

So it could have been 'come and get it'.

I think I would be wanting to know what the response was.

top marks to your dh then for most unfunny joke in the history of the world

is he usually such a fucking nob ?

OP - why were you reading his phone? Were you suspicious?

He thinks you're over reacting??????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You have to hope he sent it to her in error - if it was deliberate it's just plain weird and creepy.

I cant think of any reason why any man would send that to a woman, other than he wants to shag her.

If you think he's deleted any answer that she might have sent, and you don't think it was sent innocently, why didn't he delete the text that he'd sent?

Surely if he was trying it on with the woman, he would have been careful to get rid of all the evidence?

Maggie - I loved 'head-spinningly vile' I think this is a case that he's really pleased of his revolting double entendre, but also isn't innocent. It is not right because even if he meant it as a joke, then maybe she wouldn't read it as one. He's being a moron

and I don't think he can have meant it as a job either, but if that's his excuse then it's a rubbish one

job?! Joke

he is shagging her fgs

OP, are you ok ?

what are you going to do ?

Personally I wouldn't trust him for a minute. It is absolutely not ok for people in a relationship to send texts like that. I should take fkg strong action. I am biased tho as my ex husband started his affair like that and I gave him chance after chance to change his ways and he drove me nearly mad with grief.

Sorry but he is patently having an affair

I think it has gone way past the "flirting" stage. He is shagging her.

makes me wonder what other texts have been sent to her,both leading up to the one you saw....and after....

send a blank text from his phone? guess he's not letting it out of his sight now?

I disagree in that it may not be that he's actually having a physical affair, but he is being totally inappropriate and - as someone said above - emotionally unfaithful.

I have a male friend who went through this with his wife. He was flirting by text in quite a graphic way with someone who he knew fancied him. He would never have actually done anything about it, but the flirting was boosting his ego. It was wrong, but it took some pursuading to make him see it.

I am single and have men friends I have always been flirty with. However, when they are in relationships I don't even think about being flirty with them. If a male friend of mine - or even an ex - texted me something like that while he was with someone else there is no way I would think it was an innocent 'joke'. I would be shocked and outraged. Wouldn't you be?!

More than flirting .I think he is shagging her.

Your DH is a twunt.

Bleurgh.

That is NOT a joke!

If I got that text from a man, I would be pissed off and I'd think they were a perv.

unless I was fucking them.

that's not the sort of thing you say as a joke. Either he is sleeping with her, or he is sexually harassing her.

Either way, I think you need to have a chat with her, don't you?

lol @ dogshits...oops!