to not understand why so many poor people...

[nybom]

...are being called "poor" if they can afford:

• cigarettes/drugs
• dogs
• large amounts of takeaways/ready meals
• ready cut fruit, brands, air freshners and other superfluous crap, kids drinks/other products specifically tailored to kids
• to go out drinking
• FF babies
• to leave lights on, have electrical appliances on standby, not to use energy light bulbs, to keep the water running, to put on half a load of washing, to leave heating on at night
• to maintain artificial nails, to have hair extensions
• buy loads of beauty products
• to leave their car engine on whilst going shopping/standing in a traffic jam
• to have themed children's birthday parties with loads of props
• and most of all: have CREDIT cards so they can overdraw

i'm talking of regular habits not just occasional behaviour...

several of my friends are on benefits, so the observations are firsthand and not just assumptions.

a friend of mine (single mum on benefits) got a party bus for her DSs last birthday party (besides loads of presents), this year he's getting a wii (and loads of other presents). WTF?

why don't these people simply save more?

i on the other hand spend less than 100 pounds on a family of four (whilst buying high quality, fresh, organic products) by buying 50% of my shopping reduced/offers, at local markets and a lot of things (like toiletries) from pound shops or discounters. we buy value toilet paper (amongst other things); and i go to the hairdresser twice a year, and only to the beautycian for special occasions such as weddings. the children don't get any toys or clothes from us, as there are enough family and friends who don't know what to buy for christmas/birthday parties. so the kids basically don't cost us anything. we have one credit card and we make sure NEVER to overdraw because of the high interest rates.

i simply don't get it...

Or, we run a car, too! You have to around here if you want to work at all. The car was given to us by the ILs when they got a mobility car. It's almost 13 years old and we do leave it idling sometimes. A lot of people do this with diesels in this rural area.

If you mean me StinkyFart I was merely answering a question, and shall speak of it no more m'lud

sorry, = people, not +

mid twenties, five years ago.

WHOOPSIE!

Oh dear, looks like you've slipped up.

Never mind, give it a couple of hours and you can start an AIBU thread titled "AIBU to think that all WOHM are child hating harpies"

I am on benefits and I do ok. Just managed to start running a second hand car to ferry my dc around, one with SN and no road sense. However for the foreseeable future I will be unable to work because of his SN, I will never be able to afford to buy a house, will always be in Social Housing for various reasons outside of my control.

I wish I had less money but owned my house and had a great car. I am determined my dc will get to do all the things that others do. I am saving to take them on a fab holiday in a couple of years (have a little fund), do doubt when I do I will be judged in the way you have judged on this thread.

Oh and yes I, too have a dog. I got him when we were a dual income family, before my ex got us into a ton of debt and then left me to it. What should I do with him? He is a great comfort to me.

I do the MN hair cut and I don't get my nails done, I don't smoke or drink.

Thats my life and I am on benefits but I think you can agree that I don't fit the typical picture and tbh I don't think many do. There is the odd Daily reported knobber as there is in any walk of life but these kinds of threads crop up with alarming regularity on MN. Give it a go OP, see how you like it?

Someone who has that much time to make such observations of their friends must have a very boring life.

OP, maybe you should get down from your high horse and live a little instead of wasting time maintaining such a parochial attitude.

Did no one like my thesuarus/dictionary gag

oh god! Those pesky poor people

Daily Mail

'If you really want to help go to www.do-it.org and volunteer are a Home-Start volunteer. They'll match you up with a vulnerable young family who you can befriend and support, perhaps sharing some of your good fortune and knowldge'.

sigh, yet again I have to point out that not all families with homestart are young 'hopeless' parents that need patronising help by do gooders

I've been with them for 5 years, I'm degree educated, aged 32, with 3 children, have part time job but still on benefits and has other reasons for long term support from homestart.. and no my children aren't at risk!

The op needs to get a life and fast

Stinkyfart: I did

oh , i liked it ! well done stinky

Who the hell do you think you are, OP?

hurrah Jem !! Mission accomplished

Shiny, I was wracking my little brain trying to think who the op reminded me of

I saw this thread this morning but did not have time to post, thought it might be a tad controversal.

Way to go, OP. You managed to piss Lulumama off, that does not happen very often.

If I had known that it was chavvy to FF then I would have let my DDs starve. The shame!

I know what the hell was the FF bit about, does she mean if your "poor" you have to just starve the babies, wtf

AIBU to think that the OP's children might prefer to belong to one of her 'poor friends'' families, where their parents might occasionally buy them a toy rather than it being only christmas/birthday presents?

Nybom - if you honestly cannot see how people would find the tone and the judgementalism of your opening post offensive, then frankly I am surprised you have any friends at all! Unless you are the archetypical keyboard warrior, who comes here to say the thing she wouldn't dare to say to a real person!!

U thinks she meant that all "poor" babies should be BF as it costs nothing. I wish it were that easy!

I obviously, not U

Yeah it not as simple as that is it, so if you can't breastfeed for some reason you just have to starve them, cos as a "poor person" you should not be spending your money on formula!

And FGS don't go giving them anything healthy like pre cut fruit as an alternative

namechanged as I have a sinking feeling I know the OP in RL...

thing is regarding food cheap junk food is cheaper and than food you make from scratch.

I can buy 20 fish cakes from farmfoods for £2, a big bag chips for £1 and I can get 3 or 4 filling if unhealthy meals out of that to feed up to seven people.

Stuff from scratch would cost me far far more than this wouldn't it, I mean £3 pound for 3 or 4 meals! Bargain.

I try not to do this but there have been times in the past month when I've had to feed the kids stuff like this because We have had no money, I had to borrow 10 pound from my mum for electric too to cook the stuff!