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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to murder my husband tonight....

38 replies

CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 14/07/2009 19:14

Ok

Yesterday dh started complaining of a bad smell in living room. I could not smell anything but have been preoccupied with swine flu and poorly kids.

This morning he was moaning again so i pulled out sofas and found a few bits of apple and an empty yoghurt squeezy tube that was a bit green Neither smelt though but i hoovered and put some neutradol down.dh blamed my sisters kids as they are a bit untidy and moaned for about an hour

This afternoon the smell became unbearable and i put my nose to the carpet and it smelt fresh except for one spot next to the sofa that smelt familiar....

when my dh goes out for a drink i ask him to sleep on sofa as hes very restless in sleep (shouting out and shaking me )

one of the other delights of him being pissed is that on a few occasions he has been known to pee. This has been

on our bed,in our bed
on the carpet
in the bed in a hotel on hol
and worse of all in the babys cots at my sisters house (the baby was in bed with us, we were sitting)

he went out last fri and slept downstairs and he must have pissed on the carpet.

Im bloody fuming.Its a new shagpile and now i have had to book a carpet cleaner

i am more annoyed that hes tried to blame everone else but then the burk prob cant remember

OP posts:
shigella92 · 14/07/2009 19:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 14/07/2009 19:18

hes going to have to LIVE in the shed...

OP posts:
bigchris · 14/07/2009 19:19

he sounds like he has a problem with binge drinking

you would have to drink a hell of a lot to not make the loo

and to piss in a cot? wtf did ur sister say?

two2many · 14/07/2009 19:20

next time he has a few drinks put a nappy on him

ErikaMaye · 14/07/2009 19:20

YANBU - I'd lend you a shotgun if I had one Hope you can find a carpet cleaner soon - make she HE pays for it!!!

Mamazon · 14/07/2009 19:23

YA sooooo NBU!!

i'd kill him too

Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 14/07/2009 19:23

The carpet cleaner is coming next tues £30
i dont think i can wait that long

he drinks a couple of cans most nights but when he goes out with 'the lads' every 4 months or so he gets very drunk (they all do)

my sister never knew.I cleaned it all up and wwe nearly split up over it (it was years ago)

im a v fed up

OP posts:
Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 14/07/2009 19:25

his mates have all done it too

one pissed in a wardrobe once,on another occasion on a pile of fresh ironing and the worse, on the tv making it blow up

OP posts:
dizzydixies · 14/07/2009 19:26

if he's going to piss on the floor like a dog then he either wears a nappy, sleeps in a kennel outside OR stays at his friends house - a hotel would make him pay a cleaning bill so you should too

what is it with blokes

shigella92 · 14/07/2009 19:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 14/07/2009 19:29

i have my speech prepared and thats one sure thing

if he wants to go out and get rat arsed he can piss at thier houses..

OP posts:
LucyJones · 14/07/2009 19:31

ok i would make him sleep at a mates when they go out

Northernlurker · 14/07/2009 19:32

Well the carpet cleaner is the least of your problems! Your husband gets so drunk that he becomes incontinent and has no memory of the event? Three times a year or whatever is three times too many - and a couple of cans most nights is 14 a week which depending on the strength of the lager would be between 28 and 56 units a week. I believe the recommended level is less than 21 units.
from what you've said i got a score of 15 for him on this
Please make him get some help before you end up hospital visting!

SaBeatitudeLaPetiteBelle · 14/07/2009 19:38

God that is absolutely disgusting.

How do people live with men like this?

If you've got alzheimers it's acceptable. Otherwise, it's not.

Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 14/07/2009 19:38

I got him to a 12 and your right along with lots of people he does have a problem with it but tbh he always argues that he drinks less now (he does) as before we met and he was single he was in pub every night after work (he does 2-10) as he said he had nothing else to do

now its a few cans prob 5 nights a week and a night out 3-4 times a year

i can cope with that but the pissing i cant and hes getting it with both barrels tonight

i have been scraping to book us a family hol as a suprise but the way i feel now i feel like going without him

OP posts:
duchesse · 14/07/2009 19:40

Oh my gawd, he's barely housetrained? Are you sure he's not an unneutered cat? I would seriously consider giving someone the heave-ho if he refused to sort something like this out. The root cause is obviously his excessive drinking- he needs to address it before it gets worse.

Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 14/07/2009 19:41

he gets the kids ready for school,does all the cleaning and shopping,washing and ironing as i work longer hours.

tbh hes pretty perfect but this is big issue for me.it makes me feel sick

OP posts:
FabBakerGirlIsBack · 14/07/2009 19:42

He needs to apologise to everyone he has blamed for the smell.

Get down on his knees and scrub the carpet and have a plan for next time he goes out.

One accident, fine, two even, but not this amount and pissing in a cot is just vile.

SaBeatitudeLaPetiteBelle · 14/07/2009 19:49

tbh you don't need to be grateful that he does all that - so he should.

He has a drink problem. He's in denial about it because he used to drink more than he was younger. We live in a binge drinking culture so it's difficult for people to recognise, but really - incontinence? Is that normal behaviour now? Eeeeeeew.

Northernlurker · 14/07/2009 19:56

Ask him to do the questionaire then. We are totally fucked up when it comes to alchol consumption in this country - what so many see as normal is in fact a major insult to your body time after time.

Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 14/07/2009 19:57

i am not grateful but not many men would do all that,lets face it on the whole they are pretty useless

i know he has a drink problem but i have really tried to get him to see this, he just wont listen

OP posts:
JohnDory · 14/07/2009 20:00

please murder him

asap

twoluvlykids · 14/07/2009 20:02

I'll hold him down for you while you do it

Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 14/07/2009 20:04

hes at work so have left note as he wont be in till late and i have been on go all day with swine flu dd

hes the only swine in this house though

OP posts:
ConnieComplaint · 14/07/2009 20:13

"i am not grateful but not many men would do all that,lets face it on the whole they are pretty useless"

Speak for yourself there lady, my dh does everything you say yours does, he's far from useless - and he doesn't piss on the fucking carpet!! Your husband is just a dirty bastard.

Does he think because he takes the kids to school & cleans a bit he can hang his cock out & wet the whole house?

Get him to AA!