To never want to fly again

[Gangle]

Rapidly developing a phobia of flying. Really don't feel it's safe and if I know I have to fly I tend to dread the holiday rather than looking forward to it. I have to fly for work from time to time which I mind less than flying with DS 15 months as I just feel so responsible for his little life. Should I pull myself together and get on with it or stick to my gut and not fly again unless I absolutely have to?

Yanbu. I hate flying. I know everyone goes on and on aout the statistics, but the point is, if it does go wrong you aren't going to get out of it alive.

I travel by Eurostar - you can reach anywhere in Europe by train, could even get as far as Russia. You could in theory, get to USA that way too, although it would involve a very long and possibly cold journey and short sea passage across the Bering Strait. (See, I have researced this, such is my phobia!) You can also travel by cargo ship to North America. Or you could be put 'out' like they used to do to Mr T. (Not sure if this feasible in real life though.)

I thought you meant cleaning your house and making long 'To do lists'

Another one here with a hatred of flying - I can and do manage it, but it does always spoil the anticipation of a holiday. I actually prefer flying with all the DCs - a) if we're going to go, we'll all go together and b) they're a good distraction. But if you really can't tolerate it, then there are (nearly) always alternatives.

I don't mind flying. I hate airports and the boredom. Would travel by train every where if I could. I hate/scared of driving abroad as it becomes my responsibility. I have nearly killed my mother, as she constantly tells friends

Well some people do get out of it alive,a lot of accidents occur on the runway,when landing or just immediately after takeoff, when you have a good chance of survival.

They don't always occur when the plane is several thousand feet in the air.

If you have to fly for work I think it'd worth investing in a fear of flying course. This involves a very short flight and a detailed explanation before, during and after of the plane and it's workings, and it's safety precautions, what all the noises mean etc.

A friend took one and loved it, and she's still slightly nervous but can actually enjoy flights now.

There are a number of companies that run these courses. If you Google you should find a few.

I can't fly either . I even get frightened when I know someone in my family or a friend is flying .

If I had to you would also have to be put me out like MR T .

I feel your pain , I suffered with a terrible FOF for years, it got progressively worse until we went to Oz and that journey almost killed me, the shock and trauma put me in hospital on arrival in Oz and back in the UK.
After that I would only fly once a year for our holiday and would be terrified.

However in my 2nd year of my nursing degree I did an oncology placement and realised that there are some things in life that are just unbelievably horrible, and dying in a plane crash is deffo not the worst (compared to what some people go through).
Since then, have been much better, now usually fly about 2-3 times a year shorthaul, without drugs or alcohol.

Try getting it in perspective, a slow painful death that your family witness is far more traumatic than a few minutes plummeting to the ground, the chances are slim but when your time is up its up (see story about woman who was late for doomed Air France flight, only to die 2 weeks later in a car crash!). Try reading Alan Carr's easyway to enjoy flying, lots of great tips in there, and try Bachs rescue remedy.

HTH

This site has some articles and tips too

also someone on here once said enjoy the time in the air as the only time when you can sit, relax, read a book, watch tv and cannot be disturbed by phone ringing/doorbell/cooking/cleaning etc etc

The other point I always make about train travel, is that you see so much more and feel like you are actually 'travelling' / on a journey of discovery rather than ust a functional "a to b". I accept a long train journey would not be ideal with young DC though.

I would recommend the overnight sleeper journey to Rome to anyone. Leave Paris at 10pm, wake up to sparkling seas and olive groves at 7am. Utter bliss
Airports? Bah.

MrsSeanBean So true. If I could afford the time I would have done it this year. Travelled to Spain with Mum when I was 6 yrs & 19 yrs. Loved it, loved it, loved it. Big fan of Interail as a youth. Might go to Cadiz with Ds in a few years time.

I'm not a huge fan of flying myself even though DH is a complete flying anorak. I understand your feelings now you have a dc, I felt the same before flying to the US a couple of weeks ago - being responsible for another life and so forth. But then I figured that I'm much more likely to get run over by a London taxi than die in a plane crash, and I still cross roads in the City every day (albeit at 6 months' pg I tend to waddle across rather than dart elegantly between traffic).

I second the sleeper train recommendation, and I have also taken the Queen Mary 2 across the Atlantic. The QM2 is infinitely more civilised than flying trans-Atlantic and about the same price as a business class seat.

There are also long-haul sleeper trains in the US. I have gone from San Francisco to Los Angeles and from New York to West Palm Beach. I found them to be fine whilst pg, at least.

Sometimes you have to bite the bullet and fly, but a healthy dislike of flying does allow you to start looking at alternatives. www.seat61.com has lots of helpful advice about travelling overland and by sea.

I really dislike flying, not because of fear, but because of the interminable waiting around, and the sitting breathing other people's farts for extended periods. I also HATE airports, hate the fact there is nothing for children to to, but they manage to make space for a blood Hamleys but not a play area . GRrrr . I avoid flying wherever possible.

Hate Ryan Air and the way they treat you like an idiot.

We go and visit DHs dad in France every Summer, and for the last few years have gone by train. Takes the same time and feels much more like a journey

Yep! Not looking forward to Heathrow next week with ds. But would have looked forward to Eurostar. Went to Devon by train last year and ds made friends with the boy in front and enjoyed going to get snacks from the dining car.

at breathing other people's farts.

I am subject to that in the (relative) comfort of my own home when the babysitter's boyfriend leaves in a haze of farts and Lynx.

Nice.

I was terrified of flying, only got that way after having DC and flying with them, which apperently is very common. I had hypnonsis and after 1 session I can fly a 10 hour flight with DC and no valium

I would definately have hypnosis again after the effect it had.

yanbu! I stopped flying about 20 years ago, as I was getting worse and worse, to the point of running up the plane shouting 'I want red wine' - very loudly - as I had a Walkman attached to my ears at the time! Find cars and trains less stressful - loved the train journey to Barcelona and back. I really don't like being in the air with nothing between me and the ground. Makes my stomach lurch to think about it.

I've done the fear of flying course and can recommend it if you want to try continuing flying. I used to be on valium and whisky and I still hated it. It is expensive (around £250 when I did it ages ago) but really heavily staffed and well supported. NB it turns into "Flying with Confidence" when you get to the airport

I'm so glad there are others out there! I hate flying - it was getting progressively worse until 5 years ago on the way home from my sister's wedding in Thailand I completely freaked out and burst into inconsolable sobbing in the airport waiting to catch our last connecting flight home from london - DH (only 3 months married at the time) took pity and agreed to take 15 hour bus/ferry combo home - I knew I married him for a reason! I haven't been on a plane since.

Definitely agree with those who prefer trains. We tend to take round trip holidays now where we drive and stop off to visit friends/family in different parts of England then hop on the eurostar and head off to somewhere in Europe for a while. Saving up for a round trip cruise to the US with a few weeks of road-tripping in between!

Statistically you are much more likely to have a car crash.

pisces: sure, but then again you are much more likely to survive a car crash than a plane crash...

i have a huge fof as well, brought on by a near crash in a glider plane. i am super accident prone.

what helps a little for me is pretending that i am on a very bumpy bus, rather than a plane. i know this must sound a bit silly, but it does help me...

i tried hypnosis to get rid of my fof, which did not work at all.

I hate it to. I travel everywhere via Eurostar. If it wernt for Eurostar I don't know what I'd do. Did Morocco last year. You can get very creative when you rely on trains and the journeys are more vibrant and interesting esp if you take overnight trains. Incidently, when I took an overnight train from Paris to Rome I noticed the decor of the couchette was EXACTLY the same as in 'FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE' so sexy!

YANBU. Being propelled through the air in a metal tube does not feel natural. I hate flying too, and have had a few panic attacks on planes, but.....I love holidays and travelling so much that I'm determined not to let it stop me. Travelling with DD helps too, I really don't want her to grow up scared of flying as the opportunities it brings far outweigh the risks. So I do my best to pull myself together when she is with me, usually concentrate on reading a book or something while we are taking off (the worst bit for me). I actually find longhaul flights easier than shorthaul, the planes are bigger and you kind of forget where you are as you're up there for so long (until the turbulence!). My worst flight ever was to the Channel Islands in a tiny propellor plane!

splodge2001 Oh! yes train travel much more sexy. Can't say much more. Blond bloke from Munich, say no more! Wish I was going by train now!

Honneybunny - pisces is not quite right - you are actually much more likely to die in a car crash than a plane crash. In absolute terms as well as risk per mile, obviously.