in keeping ds1 off of school for a third day unless i can get an appt with head and class teacher?

[TheLadyEvenstar]

This is the same teacher who seems to revel in intimidating ds1. the latest thing is that she has told him she is sending a "Bad report to his secondary school". he is genuinly upset and tbh i cannot be bothered with fighting with him to get him to school iyswim?

She has her favourite pupils and for some reason he is not one of them...she takes every childs word against his and when he tries to explain what has really happened she shouts at him every time "Don't you dare lie to me" and then walks away without listening.

I never really realised the extent to which she was doing this until yesterday when he broke down and told me "Mummy it doesn't matter what I say she never believes me"

So now I am trying to get an appointment with the headteacher and the class teacher and am not sending him into school until I do AIBU?

I'm with MadameCastafiore

After her phone call why are you not physically down at the school demanding to the the HT immediately.

I don't have anything new to offer, except my support for you in dealing with this TLES, and my horror at the attitude of this teacher - nothing can forgive or explain such nastiness.

I know exactly how you are feeling - you cannot expect a child to go in to that situation. If it were me I would ask to see the anti-bullying policy, and go through it point by point with the head asking how they will apply it. Explain that one of the bullies is a teacher, and ask how he will implement the sanctions. Complain in writing to the head, copy the governors, and don't send him back until it is all resolved. Meanwhile, contact the year head at the next school, explain you know they have got to maintain a united front but you are trying to be reasonable and not getting anywhere. Also get in touch with the local authority. You might like to consider getting him signed off for the next few weeks, or even removing him from school, which won't affect him going on to the next one. At least that way you can't be done for truanting. I do know how stressful this is, and you have my sympathy.

The Head has to deal with you. Who does s/he think s/he is?

I don't think you should necessarily go in all guns blazing with his secondary school, though. You may denying your DS a fresh start - after all that comment about sending a report to the next school may well be an empty threat.

But you do need a reassurance from the school that they're going to allow your DS a fresh start in his new school.

His teacher sounds like an old-style bully, right down to the idea that she's doing good in some way, and that secondary school teachers would be much worse. Grrr.