To think we should be able to call the baby our choice of name?

[CklarahAndMarbellasMum]

I am currently 6.4 months preganant with 5th DC. We have several names lined up, but for a girl, we really love the name 'Ella Rose'. The problem is our surname will really clash with this and relatives (namely both DH and my parents), are really going crazy saying we will put our DC through a life of misery if we name her Ella, but we are determined to stick with our choice. They are all praying it is a boy!

Other 'girls name' choices are listed below, so please tell us what you think, but Ella is our very favourite!

Kate Rose
Freya
Mariella
Adrienne
Henrietta
Violetta
Isobel
Gracie
Emilia Grace

It doesn't mattter what anyone think of any of the names. Only the opinion of you and your dh counts.

I think you do have to think of the whole name really. I think I prefer all of the alternatives to Ella.

When you say it will really clash...?

If your surname really will clash with the name (and you did say this in your OP) then they are probably right. It doesn't matter how much you love the name on its own, your dd (if you have a dd) has to have and use the full name. You can't change the surname so the first name has to be the compromise.

I don't know what anyone else thinks but I would quite like to know what the surname is to make my own mind up...

if your surname really will clash- please dont do it. Life is hard enough please think of your child- why give her a reason to be teased. My favorite boys and girls name did not go with our surname- i did the right thing and chose diferently- in one case moving the preferred name to the middle of the name.

agree Ella Rose is a lovely name but not if your surname does not go!

would defo string the parents along for much longer thought

If you yourselves feel that the surname will clash badly, then you owe it to your child not to use that name or to modify it.

It may, though, be better not to tell anyone the name you would like to give your child. Let the child be the first to know their name. THen, once he or she is named, let the world know. That way it is harder for them to criticise or put pressure on you.

(Trying to think what would clash with Ella, can only imagine that your surname is Borat.)

Or Fant.

Mentary

I have a DD called Ella and love it. As long as you are happy and like it, go for it!

at 'fant'

Or decide on a name that you know you definitely will not use and that your parents will all hate. Have great fun stringing them along that you have taken their advice and come up with a different name.

By the time the baby comes they will be so glad that she is not called Marmalade Moonflip /Coco Redacto /Linkey Smiley Snail* /(insert whatever you come up with), Ella will sound like a great idea.

• apologies to anybody called any of these, not trying to imply they are bad names, just that they might not be favourite choice of OPs parents/PIL

Personally think that all your names are lovely, only one I wouldn't have on my list is Kate and I know that's just because of circumstances rather than it being a wrong name IYSWIM.

Which reminds me, do your parents/PIL know an Ella which is putting them off the name? When DH and I were looking for names for DS1, it was amazing the number of names that one of us would like and the other one would be 'oh no, I knew a xxx who was dreadful, couldn't ever have a child of mine called that'. Maybe they are also thinking along these lines?

Ok thank you all for your advice.

Surname is Ollerenshaw, so Ella Ollerenshaw

Not sure how you pronounce your surname, so my next comment might be completely spurious. But how about a longer name that you shorten to Ella? For example, Eleanor would easily shorten to Ella on a day by day basis, but use the full name when used in conjunction with the surname. I do this with DD2 - she gets called by a variety of nicknames, except when her surname is needed, then her 'full' name is always given.

I hate Eleanor with a passion! My surname is pronounced like oller, as in dollar, but without the D and then renshaw like ren-shore

No. You can't do it. I'm looking at the screen and saying it out loud. "Ella Ollerenshaw is a seller on seashore, I'm sure"

Belinda shortened to Ella?

Ella is lovely but honestly, Ella Ollerenshaw just doesn't work. Neither does Mariella, even worse if anything.
The names on your list are all very nice, but I really think any first name that ends with a is going to be a bit of a tongue twister with your surname.
Kate Ollerenshaw sounds the best IMO.

It's a real mouthful, I'm sorry to say.

We decided to ditch our favourite name because it clashed very badly with surname.

... hang on, your name is Arabella? And you already have a dd Marbella?

Change your surname by deedpoll. It doesn't really go with Marbella either

And you can't have an Ella and a Marbella. Esp. if thats pronounced Marbeya. The new one would then logically be pronounced Eya.

[these things always bother me. I can't get my head round Sean Bean at all. Shaun Baun or Seen Been?]

Would Ellie work? I have tried saying it out loud with your surname and IMO it works. I happen to like Ella too though, so maybe would use Ella-Rose as a double barrelled name which I also think would work.

why not just use Rose ...it works for me sound wise although I really like Ella as a name, just think the 'a' doesn't work as well... from your list Isobel would also sound good...the clash would not be bad enough to stop me if I really wanted the name

It is going to come out as Ella Olla Renshaw.

You cant do this.

You may laugh at the Fant, but a friend of mine stayed clear of Ella, as it would sound like Elephant with their particular surname.

Yes pania...Bella is a strong family name dating back to generations. I have cousins called Annabella and Isabella and i'm Arabella. Complicated, huh?! I wanted something different sounding for DD1, hence the pronounciation, 'Marbaya' when I was -bullied- talked gently into carrying on the family tradition.