To invite the whole of Mumsnet to come judge my Ex-P?

[madameovary]

This will probably make more sense to those posting on the Emotional Abuse thread.

Today is a difficult day for me.
Ex-P is getting "handfasted" to OW today. Apparently this is because she thinks she's terminally ill. They are doing this in front of people from the poetry world, none of whom have a clue what he is really like.

He left me in January after several weeks of "we should just be friends".
Logically I am well shot of him. I DO know this!
this was a good example of his behaviour.
DD was ten months old.
When he gets her pg, as he surely will, this will make six DC's to four different mothers.

He is 51 fgs. I recently spoke to his ex-wife who says he was controlling and abusive to her as well and that his 21 yr old son now thinks he's a joke.

Yes, I am hurting, yes I am wishing I had never met him (if not for my beautiful DD its my favourite fantasy).
And yes it will make me feel a whole lot better if you tell me what a twunt he is!

Lulumama I agree that the best revenge is to live well and happily

Scottishmummy that is EXACTLY what I say about bully who cant keep his drawers on. Yes he is that charismatic - to a certain kind of damaged woman with low-self-esteem and uncertain boundaries.
I was that woman and so is she. (Raped by her father, he was kind enough to tell me.) He said she was "as bad as me...no worse" re childhood issues and said he wouldnt have got involved with her if he'd known. Which is SUCH bollocks as it was precisely WHY he got involved. Because she was easy to play. I know. I was the same.

And his ex-wife was 17 when they got married. He was 30 . So she had youth as an excuse.

Its been a steep learning curve, but a good one, since I would rather be single for the rest of my life (and celibate!) than risk another one like him round DD.

He makes a show of wanting to see her but cant be arsed really. I am away a lot this month, thank goodness.

sadly some predatory bullies prey on vulnerable women.

so what doesnt kill you will make you stronger.reflect upon your vulnerabilities weak points.get an awareness of them so no one else can ever use them as leverage or manipulate you again

through love,affirmation and self esteem teach your dd to avoid charisnatic predators

Exactly Scottishmummy. I was shocked at the kind of man I am attracted to, so am going to counselling to deal with it and prevent it happening again.

And yes DD will be able to spot such twunts a mile off - she will have very healthy boundaries and good self esteem. I will do whatever I can to make sure of it.

aRE THEY SORT OF LIKE THAT SILLY FUCKER the 'Barefoot Doctor' (aka Stephen Russell who admitted to shagging lotso f women who came to him for 'holistic healing'?

There's one born every minute!

What a twat. 'Commitment ceremony' otherwise known as fake marriage to get her committed but leave him free to do as he pleases, since there's no legal implications.

Is he the type who talks of his 'current partner' and 'child from a previous relationship' whilst earnestly stroking goatee and wearing tye dye trousers?

Yep hes a twat, why do women go near men like this in the first place?

handfasting sounds curiously vulgar

he's a predatory twat - such a shame that he's managed to suck another woman in but it's not your problem anymore. Have a lovely evening with your DD

has he interest in new age therapies and healing?pick-a-philosophy any ole trippy guff will do oh and chuck in something celtic.

is there a poetry world?

are all handfasting people ar bit odd?

she looks ok - he looks hairy

nuts

you cant see his pony tail - ew

initialy read it as hamfisted

Arf.

He is a complete twunt, but you have got a beautiful daughter and I know she will keep you happy and smiling!

MrKrabs you have quite a talent for finding photos of munters

oh wow, so that was you? I remember that thread well. You are well rid. You were so strong in your decisions. Well done. He is an uber twunt.

it does sound like hamfisted doesn't it?

I think it'#s a bit sad to get all donned out in wedding garb, invite friends and family, probably expect presents etc, for a fake wedding...

agree with this statement

'Commitment ceremony' otherwise known as fake marriage to get her committed but leave him free to do as he pleases, since there's no legal implications.

MadameOvary, I remember that thread, I remember thinking it was UTTERLY deranged to plan for an 8 yr old to witness a birth.

I have often marvelled on your threads, MadameOvary, at what a berk you had got involved with, and I was heartily relieved that you gave him the bodyswerve...oh well, he's somebody else's problem now. I feel quite sorry for her.

As an aside, an old tutor of mine (very hippy) left her job to go and be a concubine to that Barefoot Doctor fella. Just goes to show that women who seem perfectly sensible can do some very silly things!

Just make sure you get hold of some pictures of the ceremony so you can show them to your DD when she's old enough to ask who daddy is I assume they'll be dressed up in suitably appropriate way?

(I know he has contact at the moment, but we're not actually expecting him to keep that up - now are we)