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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my colleague deserves to be fined

91 replies

Awdry · 03/06/2009 23:23

For taking his reception child out of school for two weeks a week after they have gone back for half term.

They have booked 2 weeks abroad. Their dd is struggling in school. She took ages to settle in September and and seems to have a complete lack of confidence when it comes to school. (My ds is the same age and plays with her. They already took her out for a weeks holiday in February (however she wasn't 5 then so it could be argued it wasn't compulsory.)

She is now the term after they have turned 5 and they see nothing wrong with it. They havn't even told the school yet and they fly this weekend. Both parents have totally flexible holidays (I know I deal with holiday requests and she isn't working at the moment). It is purely so they can get a cheaper holiday abroad.

Their parents have a caravan they could use in this country instead.

I have namechanged in case I am recognised.

OP posts:
ItsAllaBitNoisy · 03/06/2009 23:25

Mind your own business to be honest. Sorry.

SomeGuy · 03/06/2009 23:25

Well as she's still in reception there's actually no legal restriction on it. Y1 would be different I think.

gerontius · 03/06/2009 23:27

Surely she is minding her own business. She's not planning on complaining to anybody, or indeed doing anything. I thought that was half the point of MN - to go on about things you can't really say to people in real life.

Fimbo · 03/06/2009 23:28

I am having a battle with my dh at the moment, he wants to take my dd out of school for a week next year (first year at High School, she will be 11, ds will be in year1). I just cannot get it through his head that it is unacceptable.

I know how you feel.

sunnydelight · 03/06/2009 23:28

Why do people get so het up about this - what on earth does it have to do with you? Are you afraid that your DD will get ten minutes less of the teacher's time when this kid returns if she needs some help? People make all kinds of paenting decisions every day that other people think are crap but ultimately (issues of safety, etc. aside) it's their decision. Maybe there is something in their family situation that you have no idea about (read thread about holiday refused for an empathy lesson). Don't worry, I'm sure lots of people will be along soon to join you in your outrage!

Original poster
Awdry · 03/06/2009 23:31

It is now the term after she turned 5 so she does legally have to be in school.

My children go to a differnet school so ther is no effect on them. I just see how it will affect her.

They were going to take her out in September a couple of weeks after she started but couldn;t get booked up.

There is nothing in the family situation I don't know about.

OP posts:
Original poster
Awdry · 03/06/2009 23:32

And normally I am very of the if it is the choice of a family holiday/can't get holiday at other times etc it doesn't matter camp.

This is purely so they can have their 2nd holiday abroad this year.

OP posts:
themoon66 · 03/06/2009 23:34

'There is nothing in the family situation I don't know about.'

Wow How can you be soooo sure?

Original poster
Awdry · 03/06/2009 23:35

I can be 110% sure

OP posts:
Original poster
Awdry · 03/06/2009 23:35

I didn't want to say so before but I am family.

OP posts:
lisad123 · 03/06/2009 23:39

well not being funny, hardly abusive is it?? They arent beating her? not doing her reading? not being bothered to get her to school on time?
take your nose out, and stop worrying, its their kids, their problem

pavlovthecat · 03/06/2009 23:39

Its nothing to do with you whether they take their child out of school or not.

She is not about to sit her gcses. But even then, even if she was. YABU

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 04/06/2009 08:26

Meh
She's 5. She'll cope. So what.

'This is purely so they can have their 2nd holiday abroad this year.'

Sour grapes?

Boys2mam · 04/06/2009 08:33

My DS is in reception and will be absent from school nxt week as his gp's are taking him away with them on their 2nd holiday this year.

If I thought anyone of my DB's had anything to say about my son missing 5 days of school, I know what I'd be saying to them!!

Boys2mam · 04/06/2009 08:35

dammit.....any one of my DB's

burningupinspeed · 04/06/2009 08:39

Even if you are family I very much doubt you know everything no matter what you think.

flamingobingo · 04/06/2009 08:41

YABU

Children don't need school to learn, especially not at this young age.

oliverboliverbutt · 04/06/2009 08:43

Personally I think a holiday with the family bonding and experiencing things you wouldn't normally experience (ie day in and day out of seeing the same people & classroom) is MORE of an education for children.
Learning happens all the time, not just in the classroom!

MrsMattie · 04/06/2009 08:56

What a horrible, petty minded thread. Mind your bloody own!

Castiel · 04/06/2009 09:00

I can assure you that sharing DNA does not mean you know everything about somebody. Unless you're the wife and even then it's in doubt. Regardless, it's none of your business.

TrillianAstra · 04/06/2009 09:05

YABU for using 110%

BitOfFun · 04/06/2009 09:10

YABU.

A good holiday will do the child more good than SATS coaching or whatever it is they try to make them do at five. Stop being such a miserable nosey parker.

TheCrackFox · 04/06/2009 09:15

YABU

At 5 years old I think some family fun is much more sensible than stuck in a boring classroom.

GetOrfMoiLand · 04/06/2009 09:21

YABVU

Sanctimonious thread.

Expect OP is writing a missive to the school as we speak insisting they are fined.

rookiemater · 04/06/2009 09:23

Crikey poor old OP, I actually agree with you and think YANBU.

It is true holidays are good bonding experiences and parents get to spend vital time with their children, hence the reason that schools have such long breaks in between terms. At least I assume this is the reason rather than just to torment working parents.

I can vaguely see the point of taking a child out of school for a once in a lifetime experience, for example my relatives from NZ have taken their daughter out so they can do a world trip, but in this case she is experiencing different languages, has to write up a diary every evening, is putting a pin on a map with the flag of each country she has been to. So in that case then fair enough, but if its just to save money on a bog standard holiday then I feel its not on, or at least not on a regular basis. Going away during the school holidays is expensive, that is true, but surely this is one of the things that you just have to suck up as a parent, to ensure that your child gets a decent education and if a child is insecure and not settling in their class, whisking them out for two weeks certainly isn't going to help the situation.

Anyway am meant to be working from home today so must go......

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