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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To make comments to a set of parents who parked in a parent and child space...

30 replies

shhhh · 30/05/2009 21:20

and.........left their kids in the car while they shopped...?

I went to my local Tesco with ds (2), it was busy and a car in front of me pulled into a p&c space. The parents got out, walked into the store...

On route I wound down my window and advised them the space was p&c, they replied "yes,we know. The kids are in the car" .

"Yes, but the reason is to help parents with kids so they don't have to treck over a busy car park with them " was my reply "Not as a kid minding service".

Sorry,if I have misunderstood the reasoning behind p&c spaces..

OP posts:
onepieceofcremeegg · 30/05/2009 21:22

I honestly think that life is too short to worry about it. If people are rude enough to do this, then they are most unlikely to respond nicely to your observations.

Far more likely that they would respond with verbal abuse (imo) Having said that I do think that their behaviour is out of order.

How old were the dcs left in the car? If they were babies/very small then perhaps you should have taken further action (such as alerting the police/social services)

ellingwoman · 30/05/2009 21:26

Actually the reason is that the spaces are wider and it's easier to get children in and out. That's why it makes sense to move them further away from the entrance where they are 'sought after'

Original poster
shhhh · 30/05/2009 21:27

Yeah,I agree life is to short and although annoyed me at the time im not livid now iykimw...just wanted to pass on todays observations .

Yeah, they weren't rude YET couldn't really see what the problem was...

No idea of kids age..which also made me think. If old enought to be in car alone then shouldn't be in a p&c space (personal view..) and if young then shouldn't have been left...

IMO, they weren't "popping" in as took a trolly... although give them the benefit, they may have been buying bulky..?

OP posts:
Original poster
shhhh · 30/05/2009 21:29

They are also by the doorway as safer to walk to the store ellingwoman...Not walking across busy car parks.

Otherwise I would park at one side of the car park away from all cars BUT thats not easy when negotiating across a car park with 2 toddlers..

OP posts:
howtotellmum · 30/05/2009 21:32

I have to admit that I have done this ONCE with no kids. Reason- absolutely full car park and desperate need to pop in quickly. Would never ever bag a diabled space, but TBH loads of mums with quite old DCs use the P&C spaces which seems a cheat- they are bigger spaces so you can get yr pushchairs in and out etc.

Original poster
shhhh · 30/05/2009 21:36

Not just pushchairs howto...

Doors need to be opened wide to unstrapp lo's from car seats..otherwise we get "the stare" if we knock our door into to the door of someone else..

(I don't take a pushchair into a supermarket)

OP posts:
weaselm4 · 30/05/2009 21:36

Ooh, the using the P&C spaces when you've got BIG children gets my goat almost as much as people with no children at all using them!

And using them when you haven't got your child with you because you can get away with it with your childseat in the car is naughty too.

Right, judgey hat off now

Original poster
shhhh · 30/05/2009 21:41

here here weasel .

I just know how much of a struggle it is with lo's and getting a trolly etc.

OP posts:
notsoteenagemum · 30/05/2009 21:42

Big children need space to get out too weasel, my ds gets many a 'stare' from over enthusiastic door opening.

TsarChasm · 30/05/2009 21:44

YABU and have misunderstood the reasoning behind the spaces.

They are provided as a courtesy only regardless of whether you approve of how other parents choose to use that space or how old their children are etc.

cthea · 30/05/2009 21:46

I parked in a P&C space once when I didn't have any DCs with me. It was force of habit and I only realised when leaving. Embarrassing but at least it wasn't at parent rush hour.

Original poster
shhhh · 30/05/2009 21:52

maybe so tsarchasm, but im curtious to others when i shop minus kids so guess i expect the same...

OP posts:
ScummyMummy · 30/05/2009 21:53

I don't really understand why everyone gets so upset about parent and toddler parking.

Bonneville · 30/05/2009 21:54

I get rather tired of hearing all this reasoning that the p&t spaces are near to the door so that parents dont have to negotiate a busy car park. It seems to be the norm now that in a lot of these carparks you do not have to negotiate cars because there are walkways/paths between the rows of cars - so no reason to not have bigger spaces at the back, leaving more spaces near the door for disabled drivers or 10 minute spaces for people who just want to quickly pop in and out. Many parents dont have access to a car, and have to struggle using public transport, negotiate busy main roads and bus stations. Surely when compared to this a (bigger) p&t space near the back of a supermarket carpark shouldn't really be a problem.

TsarChasm · 30/05/2009 21:57

It's still your interpretation of how the spaces should be used. I think you are on iffy ground making comments to people about it tbh. There are no rules about it really.

The extra space around the car is the really helpful factor. In that case it's just as easy to park futher away where ther are often more spaces anyway.

Original poster
shhhh · 30/05/2009 21:59

BUT bonneville, sometimes is not the comparison to parents who walk everywhere thats needed....I know for example at my local store trollys are located near the door/p&c spaces.

I find it a struggle to walk with 2 toddlers accross the car park as ours does not have walkways/paths all over iykwim.

YES,I have walked accross the car park with ds and dd and got a trolly at the door BUT find it a struggle with 2 lively toddlers as well as the numerous bags we need to be armed with these days.!

NOW, should trollys be left out longer than they are then I can grab one to push the dk's into the store..

OP posts:
traceybath · 30/05/2009 22:01

I just hope they left the windows open - it was so hot today i wouldn't fancy being stuck in a car in a car park for very long.

2shoes · 30/05/2009 22:02

P&C should be near the store if we have to have them(but not as close as disabled bays for obvious reasons) but tbh I think they should be scrapped as they cause so mush trouble.

Original poster
shhhh · 30/05/2009 22:02

and they had dogs in the car...maybe thats more for some folk..?

Maybe the dogs were minding the kids

OP posts:
pjmama · 30/05/2009 22:12

I would much prefer the P&C spaces to be away from the doors with a good supply of trolleys nearby - then they're less attractive to the lazy buggers who can't be arsed to walk and the anal who don't want their cars bumped (which probably mostly happens due to mums with toddlers trying to get their kids out, coz all the P&C spaces are full! Ironic much?).

Incidentally I recently watched my local Sainsburys car park attendant stick a ticket on a VW Passat in a P&C space, with no kids seat in. Hurray for Sainsburys! The look on the blokes face when he returned to his car (alone) was priceless.

Original poster
shhhh · 30/05/2009 22:19

pj,I agree with the idea about spaces and trollys. Wouldn't bother me where I parked just as long as it was safe to get to store and had trollys.

Just to add about sainsbury's..our local Asda store clamps people parking wrongly .

OP posts:
atworknotworking · 30/05/2009 22:38

LOL @ babysitting dogs, I think people should be considerte with parking spaces disabled or P&T. But not too judgemental either a while ago DH came back from our local supermarket in a strop because some lady (that's not what he called her) had a go at him for parking in a P&T she said that's for mothers and babies you know he replied what do men not have children too, he then helped DD out the back, she was about 6 or 7 at the time so same woman had a go about how the spaces are for young children! he really got p*d off as DD has been very ill and couldn't walk to far (she has a ride in trolly) so I agree spaces should be used correctly, but sometimes it's not helpful when people "have a go" without knowing the facts our DD was quite upset by the way

Original poster
shhhh · 30/05/2009 23:13

Sorry to hear that atwork....

Think todays episode, the couple were to lazy imo. Easier to leave kids in car and park close to store.

OP posts:
foryourchild · 30/05/2009 23:14

In a supermarket where I used to live they had the right idea....there was a P&C area to the left of the main entrance which was a bit out of the way, but with a walkway where you didn't have to cross the car park. This left the spaces right in front of the store available for people who needed to pop in to the store for 10 minutes, and for other shoppers.

Also, another store, the P&C spaces were at the furthest point away in the car park, but with a clear zebra crossing from the spaces, leading to the ramp area down to the shops.

I have 3 children under 5, and it's nice to have the extra space to get them all out, but as long as there is a safe route, it doesn't have to be the closest, and actually in our current supermarket, some of the disabled spaces are much further away than the P&C spaces...silly really!!

SomeGuy · 30/05/2009 23:18

Driving into Sainsburys today with two children, dd 1 and ds 6, woman in front of us bagged the last space. Her daughter was about 13 and taller than my wife!

I spotted her a couple of times in the shop with her enormous child but didn't bother saying anything to her. They do admittedly call it parent and child parking, but it's still taking the piss.

We did find an space with room around it at the far end of the car park although still a bit dodgy walking with 1 year old across the busy car park.