To remove the toy baby feeding bottle from my dd's new doll bath and feeding set?

[Springfleurs]

I was brought up to think that breast feeding was a strange and rather disgusting thing to do.

Luckily managed to overcome this myself and b/f both dc for 5 months and 14 months respectively.

Took dd to a toy shop today and she chose a doll bath and feeding set. Unpacked it for her when we got in and there is a feeding bottle in there. I know it might seem a bit precious but it irritated me slightly, as though it was a mandatory piece of equipment for all babies/dolls.

Or

I am taking it all rather too seriously?

Sorry my last post was to Manatee's 15.34 post - boy this thread moved fast there!

Plenty of BF babies never have a bottle for anything!! DD gets one now for cows milk when I am work, but that is through my own laziness as she is rubbish at taking a big amount of milk from a cup and I haven't really persevered.
But I think YANBU - she should learn BF as the basic way to feed babies - it's a drip drip effect to normalise something, the way bottle feeding has been normalised - we should be taking small steps where we can so that bottle feeding is seen as an alternative.

Fair enough. Of course bfing should be normalised and children shouldn't grow up thinking it's somehow weird and unnatural, but I still think you are overreacting to a child's toy.

On the point of people being shocked at not buying bottles as they consider them to be as important as cots and prams, what about people who co-sleep and use slings? Would they be this upset at a little girl having a doll's pushchair?

i do undestand why the op felt the need to remove the bottle. it is v frustrating to want to bf and have formula foisted on you at every opportunity, especially if you found bf hard. and i do admire her decision to make a stand. whether using a dolls bottle would impact on her dd's future feeding choices is doubtful, but i do think that she should have some credit for trying to portray bf as the natural/normal option. she didnt tell dd that the bottle was bad or anything like that. she is merely putting across the message that babies dont always feed from bottles. she is perfectly within her rights to choose which toys her child uses in roleplay.

Niecie, yes, I do think that childish games, alongside total negativity towards breastfeeding had an impact on my attitudes and decisions I made with regard to how I was going to feed my dc. I only b/f my ds for 5 months and I felt like I had done a brilliant thing and really "put myself out" for him. This I believe was a total hang up from the attitudes and ideas I experienced as a child from my Mum and all the other women I knew, none of whom breast fed and who were really negative about it.

I read up on it more before I had dd and managed to go 14 months, would have liked to go longer but she stopped. I realise that I was NOT doing my child a favour by b/f, in fact I did ds a disservice by stopping so soon for my own selfish reasons. I can trace all these thoughts and attitudes back to my childhood.

If your DD has a bottle with her dolly she can choose to pretend to ff or bf, its all about choice don't you know, in the nicest possible way, please get a grip.

I am not b/f, we don't know anyone who is b/f so dd is not getting a balanced education about the methods of feeding is she? As someone else said the "drip drip" of normalising ff has already begun and I don't have any way to counter it. She will absorb the bottle as being the "normal" method of feeding before she is old enough to understand other options.

Shineon I don't want to start a big ruck with you but I can't understand why anyone would choose not to breastfeed, I think it is selfish quite frankly.

However I don't care at all what others choose to do. My concerns are the normalising of bottle feeding right from the beginning, starting with the inclusion in childrens toys.

I dressed up as a a fairy when I was a child - I don't now, nor do I believe in fairies.

I played at being 'mummy' and did pretend washing up, ironing etc. I certainly don't do that now I have a DH!

I played with dolls as a child, they had bottles that I used to feed them their 'milk'.

I was bf, both of my DD's were bf, the gestating baby that is currently 9 days overdue will be bf.

I personally feel you are being a bit precious and I think there have been some overreactions on this thread. However, it does depress me that people have been made to feel strange for bf'ing.

As several people have said, it's all about choices, and I feel very strongly that you shouldn't single other posters out and call them selfish for making their choice. No-one has posted anything negative about breastfeeders, so please don't call other people selfish.

Springfleurs, I agree with you - baby bottles do suggest that the only way to nourish a baby is through FF. My daughter (and my son) both pull up their tops if they think their teddies/dolls are thirsty and I am really happy that they think breastfeeding is the norm. (I would also throw away the doll's dummy if it was part of the set though - I am a bit hardcore about these things .)

I think that's totally out of order Springfleurs, ever woman has the right to choose how to feed her child, though seeing as you won't even allow your dd the choice of how to feed hers it is hardly surprising.

I have changed my mind as YAB very U.

I am not singling anyone out, Shineon gave me that info as part of her post, it wasn't really relevant to what I am trying to say at all, I am trying to discuss the normalising of formula feeding not ask everyone what their choices were so I can judge them.

grumpyold.... the voice of reason on this thread.

My ds played with swords, guns and power ranger lasers etc etc etc. He now can't even remember playing with them.. let alone think he should use one to settle a dispute!

I played with dolls and fed them with the little bottle, but still breast fed both mine.

You are definately totally overthinking this.

Verbal battering was not my intent in any way at all so I hope it is not being interpreted that way. Just a general opinion, not a personal attack.

springfleurs, afraid youve lost me a bit now. that was totally uncalled for and out of order. women choose not to bf for many reasons, and it is arrogant to call one woman selfish for making the choices that she has.

I wouldn't have thought for one second that you weren't well educated shineon, have read enough of your posts.

YANBU. I'd smash it with a hammer.

I've just started reading The Politics of Breastfeeding and am getting even angrier about the promotion of formula than I already was.

Breastfed babies don't need water, no need for bottles, DS has never had one.

I said that I don't understand why anyone wouldn't even try and if they don't then I think they are selfish it was not a personal attack on shineon so please lets not go down that road.

But what if she needs to express?

I would keep the bottle and supplement with a child-sized breast pump.