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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate being called 'auntie' by kids that are not my nieces or nephews?

137 replies

Nancy66 · 27/05/2009 12:12

Really grates on me.

In fact I don't even like my actual nieces and nephews to call me 'auntie' but friends kids...yuk.

OP posts:
ArcticLemming · 27/05/2009 12:26

I don't think it's a class thing. I think it's quite old fashioned - wil all did it at kids. I personally don't like it and nip it in the bud. It took me years as a child to work out who my real relatives were.

WhiteFish · 27/05/2009 12:26

Yes I am posh.
Auntie ANn was also posh.

EffieGadsby · 27/05/2009 12:26

YANBU. On the other side, I get really annoyed when friends of my sister refer to themselves as the 'aunties' of my nephew. I want to say to them, "oh so do you change his nappies; do you hold him with your top and hair soaked in baby sick when he's poorly and vomiting all over you; have you held his newborn self for half the night to allow my exhausted sister and her DH to get some sleep? No. So don't call yourself an auntie, when what that means is that you visit once every three months and tell him how cute he is". Rant over, but this really annoys me as his genuine aunt.

jammietart · 27/05/2009 12:27

its a Peter Kay thing 'she's not really my auntie but my mum swims with her every wednesday'

BitOfFun · 27/05/2009 12:29

Blimey Effie, you got the job description for Auntie mixed up there, I think! < passes manual, unstained by puke and poo >

Rindercella · 27/05/2009 12:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

B1984 · 27/05/2009 12:31

I hate it!our family friends insist on our dcs calling them auntie and uncle,but my dcs call them by their names sometimes(they are 2 and 3),and they keep on correcting them and then i feel like i need to correct them when i really dont want to.Its a really akward situation.I think as long my dcs are polite to them they shouldnt need to call them auntie and uncle,because we are not related.

SlartyBartFast · 27/05/2009 12:32

we dont do it now, when we were children, i thought about it, but thought my particular close friend wouldnt like it.

muppetgirl · 27/05/2009 12:32

I wish I had a sister now if that's what they do!

My parents failed me you know as I only got 2 brothers.

FAQinglovely · 27/05/2009 12:33

ahh - so DH and I aren't really an Aunty and Uncle to his younger brothers DD - given that we've never even met her - let alone had the opportunity to do those things

lovelyboy · 27/05/2009 12:33

B1984 you are Soooooo Right. Why on earth do these people insist on the auntie/uncle thing. I find that a bit odd.

SlartyBartFast · 27/05/2009 12:34

i love it that my nieces call me auntie, even the 17 year old one
although we only see them once or twice a year due to distance

EightiesChick · 27/05/2009 12:41

As an only child I shouldn't get called Auntie at all by this level of strictness. I can still remember getting tearful when my best friend's DS came running out to me and said 'Auntie EightiesChick!' for the first time.

I grew up working class and it was routine for kids addressing adults who were friends of the family. It tended to die off as kids got to be teenagers which seems reasonable to me. DH and I are firmly middle class now, but I can tell you that we will be teaching our DS to address our good friends as Auntie and Uncle. I like it.

EightiesChick · 27/05/2009 12:43

And FAQing lovely - I'm glad it's not only me that spells Aunty with a y. I have given up these days and bow to the dominance of the 'ie', as above, but it was what I did as a child and I just like it.

BalloonSlayer · 27/05/2009 12:44

I love it.

I'll be Auntie to anyone who'll have me .

I'm even Auntie to people's cats.

elsiepiddock · 27/05/2009 12:46

I have never heard of this! It seems quite odd to me.

None of my nieces or nephews use 'auntie' or 'uncle' though, even for their actual relatives, and nor do my dcs.

wotulookinat · 27/05/2009 12:47

I like it.
I only found out recently that I man I had known as Uncle when I was little was in fact a gardener employed by my Uncle!!

SummatAnNowt · 27/05/2009 12:53

Gosh this came up at our church study group last night and I've been feeling crap about it since then because I think it's fine for my son to call unrelated older people by their first name and he also doesn't have to use auntie and uncle with his proper aunties and uncles, which they also like.

The older generation and the vicar were arguing that it marked out respect and such. I've been feeling like some crazy hippie since.

SummatAnNowt · 27/05/2009 12:54

did I mention about feeling crap since then

wotulookinat · 27/05/2009 12:54

I was brought up thinking it was respectful. I now call my aunties by their first names, but only recently (I'm 30), unless I want something

shelleylou · 27/05/2009 12:56

my best mate is ds's auntie. He adores her and she loves being known as his auntie xxx. Its also the closest thing he will have to one as none of his blood aunties know of or acknoledge his existance.

Longtalljosie · 27/05/2009 12:57

Your vicar sounds like a right barrel of laughs

I am an "auntie" as well as being an auntie and absolutely adore my "nieces". Family's what you make it.

infin · 27/05/2009 13:19

If you can't bear the 'aunty' tag, never ever consider living (or holidaying?!) in India!! Anyone you meet with children will label you 'Aunty' immediately. I have settled in a seat for 2 minutes on a train only to have a toddler placed on my lap with "Go and sit with Aunty!!" So I'm happy to be 'Aunty'.

Heated · 27/05/2009 13:29

Am the product of an older mother and also have a lot of Asian friends, so 'aunty' or it's Hindi equivalent is often used by dcs as a polite appellation.

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 27/05/2009 13:30

Another very middle class one here who has 'Aunties' who aren't related, although they are people who have been close friends of my parents since before I was born. Not everyone gets the prefix.

I think it's a lovely way of showing affection and respect. DH and I are now 'Auntie and Uncle' to the children of longstanding friends, and our close friends are the same to DS.

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