To think this is the worse film I have EVER seen?

[chegirl]

I think I am still in mild shock.

Had a bit of time to kill yesterday afternoon so thought I'd watch a bit of telly. Blues Brothers 2000 was on. Loved the original and whilst I didnt think this would match it, it did have an impressive cast so thought I would give it a go.

Have you SEEN it It was so bad it sort of mesmerised me. It was like it was started without a script or plot line and they sort of chucked things at it as they went along.

At one point a voodoo queen turned them all into green zombies so they would play crappy pop/jazz fusion. There were also animated skeleton cowboys riding on skeleton cows, a car driving under water for at least a mile (not a special car, just a car), a black policeman levatating through the roof of a revival meeting and turning into the 3rd blues brother on his way down, a car pile up that went on for about 5 minutes long after anyone driving behind the first few cars would have realised something was up and Russian gangsters who turned into rats.

Twas mad. How the hell did they get James Brown and Eric Clapton involved in that?

John Goodman was in it. I am wondering if he produced it. I think he has a history of these vanity projects.

Anyone got it on DVD? I think I need to see it one more time.

So am I right or is there a worse film?

I saw a loathesome Lindsay Lohan/Jane Fonda vehicle called Georgia Rules. We walked out half and hour into the film.

I hate Pulp Fiction (if I see Uma Thurma an JT dancing one more time I'm gonna hurt somebody)

Film I have never, ever seen even a 5 minute snippet of, because I think it will annoy the tits off me, is Forrest Gump. Can't stand Tom Hanks (but Apollo 13 is fab! despite Hanks' miserable face throughout) and from what I've heard about the film, it'd make me hurl things at the screen.

I can't actually watch Watership Down because it terrifies me, but I pretend it's because it's not a very good film.

Has anyone seen Knowing? Went to see it recently with a friend and we were close to walking out. Horrifying scenes, and appalling, halfbaked, badly-thought-out religiousity at the end. My current contender for Terrible Film.

(Pedants please: does 'badly-thought-out' have that many hyphens? It just doesn't look right.)

The remake of the Omen was terrible. No scary carmina burana soundtrack, why did they bother to remake it?

And of course Love Actually, Notting Hill and that terrible film about tennis by Woody Allen

I'll take your Sliding Doors and The Holiday and I'll raise you I am Legend.

Generally I don't mind Will Smith but have you seen Hancock?

Boxing Helena is the worst film I have ever seen.

DH wanted to ogle at Sherilyn Fenn and I was happy to look at Julian Sands, but it was dire.

I have fallen asleep everytime I have tried to watch any of the Alien films.

....another vote for 'Lost in Translation'

In fairness, this isn't really the worst film I have ever seen, but it is the most disappointing.

...It seemed, on the face of it, that the film would be thoughtful, intelligent, funny and wistful.

It has Bill Murray in it. This is normally A Good Thing, even in mediocre or poor-ish movies (Groundhog Day, Garfield).

...but Lost in Translation is monumentally dull with a capital Duh.

Dull dull dull. With a side helping of monumentally boring.

....I mean, Escape to Victory is bad, but not boring. Especially the bit where Pele, holding a paw in the Lassie stylee, scores an overhead kick three times in slow motion....

Quentin Tarantino is shite, too.

Dogma is probably my favourite film ever (next to The Princess Bride).

I don't get out to the cinema very often these days, so am relatively choosy about what I watch and have not seen any of these bags of shite you speak of (Mamma Mia, Blues Brothers 2000, Lost in Translation, Forrest Gump, Battlefield Earth, Pitch Black and others).

However, one I wish I'd walked out of is Star Wars III - Revenge of the Sith. That bit at the end when he's becoming Darth Vader is so tragically bad it's funny. Actually all 3 of the second lot of Star Wars are dreadful, but we kept on going back to the cinema in the hope of them getting better... it didn't happen...

Ooh, and Along Came Polly - my niece chose to see this as her birthday treat so I couldn't get out of it... I actually like Jennifer Aniston but this was a pile of utter toss.

One I keep catching bits of on Sky is Chronicles of Riddick - I keep wondering what the hell Judi Dench needed the money so badly for...

• I love Groundhog Day. It's one of my favourites.

Can I place a vote for The Horse Whisperer? Just how many shots of Kristin Scott Thomas looking pensive can one film bloody well have!

I wanted so much to see Love Actually but couldn't due to DCs. It came out on DVD one Mother's Day and I specifically requested it (when asked what I would like!) I got something else. I have seethed about this - in a low key way I must add, I am not a loon - for a few years.

It was on the telly a month or so ago. Recorded it with joy. Started watching with enthusiasm. . . what a pile of shite . . . DH now well and truly forgiven (not that he ever noticed my displeasure anyway)

Naked Gun 33 and a third - the only film I've ever walked out of.

Closely followed by Basic Instinct.

All right ShineOn, you're on. You've got a deal. What film are you proposing I watch?

The reason I think Fight Club is worth a second look is, while I didn't hate it the first time I watched it, I just didn't notice how complex it is.

the worse film ever ever is bridget jones, edge of reason. even if it did have colin firth in it.

No no no. You've all missed one. Eyes Wide Shut. What a pile of poo. What was it actually about? No-one knows.

Closely followed by Circus. A British film about nothing. Or at least it was so dire I don't actually remember what it was about. Gangsters and cars IIRC.

Followed by Moulin Rouge.

I've only ever walked out in disgust at one film - "The Idiots"

but the worst film I've ever seen is "How To Get Ahead In Advertising" with Richard E Grant. I DARE you to watch it

Agree chegirl. I quite enjoyed Lock Stock, but it spawned 873498274 million bandwagoneers and now the whole genre is dull and rubbish.

you all obviously had more sense than me and didnt bother watching Burn After Reading.

My god, that was the biggest pile of shite in the world. There arent many films I HATE and want to just throw in the bin, but god this was one.

Burn Before Watching more like. Utter shit.

We once, years back, taped Evita (Madonna) from the telly and saved it to watch for a nice evening in.

I think it was on for about two minutes.

I am just watching 'An affair to remember' have finished watching 'Kiki's Delivery Service' (am allowed as DS3 kept me up all night and I need the rest).

And I STILL cant stop thinking about bloody Blues Brothers 2000!

ShineOnCrazyDiamond, I haven't seen Damnation Alley. You're right it looks well dodgy at first description.

Are you sure we're doing this for real? Because I will watch it and report back in 7 days or whatever.

But they don't seem comparable. I originally took you to task about big blockbusters that lots of people like but you hated. This is a little small fry, isnt it? We could easily find something mainstream that I loathed and you loved, and I'll give it a second look.

But if that's the one you want me to do, I will. And meet you either here, or in movie reviews, in 7days time?

(Nah, I'm not that bothered about music, although I'm sure we could find something to clash about. Films are better than music).

I'd like to nominate "One Man and his Dog" - a Lock Stock wannabe 'starring' that twunt off Celebrity Love Island (Paul Danan?), darts legend Bobby George as fearsome gang boss and - best of all - Ray Stubbs as gang boss henchman, complete with machete. Unmitigated shite.

Agree with Lost in Translation.... dull dull dull.

Ronin - biggest pile of tripe. What was in the farkin box for crying out loud ?! A whole 2 hour film about something being in a box and you never get to find out what it was ?!

'Swordfish' was also really bad. I actually found it offensive.