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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell them both to piss off,

153 replies

WorzselMummage · 05/05/2009 13:24

On Saturday a neighbours cat ran out from underneath a parked car under my wheels as i pulled off my drive, I'd estimate i was doing about 10 mph, if that. I didnt even see the cat, i just heard it if you know what i mean. I feel bloody awfull about it.

I went and told the owner immediatly, helped he catch the cat and offered to take her anywhere she needed to go, of course i said sorry about a million times and was crying as felt so bad about it. She said she was waiting for it to happen as the cat had been hit before and had no road sense. The cat was a bit of a PITA tbh and i know several of the other neighbours have had near misses.

I went back a few hours later and the cat had had to be put to sleep i appologised again, i didnt offer to pay any vets fees as tbh i thought it wouldnt have cost that much to have him pts and presumed she'd have been insured.

Fast forward to last night and we get a knock on the door, we're in out nightclothes just about to go to bed. Df answers the door and there is some bloke we're never seen before stood there shouting and yelling about how we should have offered to pay the vets bills, the cats owner is a single woman etc etc etc.

I think said person was expecting me to answer the door but Dfs did and he's a big 6footer who looks hard ( but is soft as they come ) so i get the feeling he wanted to have a go at me and when he say it was df he ranted for a minute, called us fuckers and started walking away.

I got dressed and went round there, spoke to her, appologised again and said of course we'll contribute something by way of a sincere appology but we wont be paying the whole bill.

Then bloke started shouting at me again and dragged the girl inside saying i wasn't worth speakng to..

i am tempted to tell them both to piss off now. It was an accident and i have been grown up enought to hold my hands up to it, i could have just driven off but i choe to do the right thing and for tht i have been abused on my doorstep and shouted at in the street. It's like money with menaces and i'm not easily intimidated.

The cat apparently wasn't insured, the bill was aparently £200..

what would you do ?

OP posts:
Original poster
WorzselMummage · 05/05/2009 15:56

No Divvy none atall.

Our cars a vectra so it's massive !

I dont think the cat stood a chance really

OP posts:
Original poster
WorzselMummage · 05/05/2009 15:58

I am not Jesus and my name is sarah..

Jesus whouldn't have hit it in the first place and i don't think there are cats where Judy comes from....

OP posts:
Ripeberry · 05/05/2009 16:05

If he bothers you again without showing proof of £200 bill, then tell him that you are calling the police for threatening you and demanding monies!
He's trying to make a quick buck for himself.

pinkstarfish · 05/05/2009 16:08

No YANBU. It's her cat, her responsibility hence it should be her vet bill at the end of the day.

Casserole · 05/05/2009 16:24

My understanding is that legally, cats are classified as wild animals, because they can't be trained as dogs can.

Therefore, if a dog causes damage or injury, the owners are legally responsible. However, if a cat does the same, the owners aren't.

By the same token, if you run over a dog, you are legally required to report it to the police. If you run over a cat, you aren't.

So my guess is that legally you are not required to pay the vet bill (but I don't know this for sure).

I would ask if they were insured. If they were, I might offer to pay the excess (unlikely to be more than £50). If they weren't, I might offer to go half. Depends whether you want to fall out with your neighbours. But I would also warn the bloke who came to your door that you won't hesitate to call the police if he behaves in such a threatening way again. So I'd probably fall out with them at that point anyway!

Casserole · 05/05/2009 16:25

Sorry, also to say that my guess is that, as the cat wasn't immediately killed and it took two of you to catch it, that they weren't insured and that it probably could have been saved but the vet quoted them hundreds of pounds to do so and they decided they couldn't be arsed to pay that.

In that case, I wouldn't pay at all.

Jux · 05/05/2009 16:27

I'm another one who thinks you should pay for the pts part of the bill. If there have been additional treatments, x-rays etc, then they would have had to get permission from the owner and so that would be her decision and her bill to pay.

Pet insurance is a ridiculous racket. I've had cats all my life; had a couple insured when I lived in central London, but it wasn't worth it - saved me about £40 when one of mine was run over and needed lots of treatment. I could have sent the vet on a world cruise with the amount it cost altogether. Insurance - crap.

mascaraohara · 05/05/2009 16:28

that's true Casserole.. re. dogs and cats so I agree, legally probably they won't have a leg to stand on.

I honestly don't think you should do anything. Especially without a copy of the vets bill. She may have CHOSEN to have the cat put down rather than pay for an operation or to have a borkem leg pinned etc

don't go round there, if he comes to you threaten him with police. if she comes round be polite but just explain that after the way he spoke to you that you don't think there's anything more to be said on the matter

Paolosgirl · 05/05/2009 16:30

I wouldn't pay I'm afraid. If you have a cat, which as Casserole says are classified as wild animals, and it's not a house cat ie you let it roam outside, then you as the owner have to accept all liability for this kind of thing. If you don't have insurance, then it's too bad.

Original poster
WorzselMummage · 05/05/2009 16:32

Oh i am sure legally i am not obliged to do anything, i wans't even obliged to tell her i'd hit the cat but i did as it was the right thing to do.

She did say that there was the option of transfuring him to another hospital for treatment but presumably she couldnt afford it so he was pts.

Sorry as i am, that isn't my fault.

OP posts:
poopscoop · 05/05/2009 16:34

There is no way you can be held responsible for what happened. You did not deliberately set out to knock the cat over. It is their cat, you have apologised, and may well have been kind enough to pay part of the bill. But after their behaviour, or the behaviour of this man, no way. He is threatening you and trying to bully you into paying £200. Do you know which vet? Can you call them for clarifcation of the bill? Sounds awfully steep.

Stayingsunnygirl · 05/05/2009 16:48

People - it's not just the cost of euthanising the cat!!!

If an injured cat is taken to the vet, they will do investigations such as x-rays etc, plus they may have given the cat medication for pain etc - and all of this plus the cost of putting the cat to sleep could well have added up to £200.

If it was my cat, I would have been grateful that you'd told me, and given me the chance to take the cat to the vet for the appropriate treatment, rather than leaving it so that the cat went off and died slowly in agony. You did the right thing.

Fwiw, if you'd then offered to pay towards the bill, I'd have been grateful, but I'd have refused - like many others on this thread and yourself, my cat is insured - though our insurance doesn't cover the cost of the euthanasia - and that plus the excess seems to take a big chunk off what the insurers pay out, in my sad experience.

The bloke seems to be totally out of order - if I were you, I'd wait 'til he's out, then go round with some flowers and offer to pay the £50 you had in mind. Mention how tough things have been for you this past year, and how the chap's abuse upset you, and tell her that you hope that you and she can sort it out amongst yourselves without any more angst.

LadyAga · 05/05/2009 16:54

Pets are a privilege, not a right. If you can't afford to look after it properly, which in my opinion includes insurance, you shouldn't have one.

I am the biggest cat lover I know, I adore them, but I don't have one as I can't afford the time or money right now.

I think it would be polite to offer a contribution of whatever you think is a reasonable amount and can aford towards the cost but you shouldn't feel obligated.

The responsibilty lies with the cat owner.

Original poster
WorzselMummage · 05/05/2009 16:56

I dont think he could insure him as he'd been hit before and only had 3 legs .

OP posts:
pellmell · 05/05/2009 17:25

Can someone please explain why anyone but the owner of the cat should pay...anything?
I just don't get it!

FrankMustard · 05/05/2009 17:42

I'm with your pellmell...and the conspircay theory part of my brain is wondering if this actual cat is even a past-tense cat at all!

Giltz · 05/05/2009 17:53

You knocked over a cat yes but to ask you to pay is out of order, this is the risk you take when you have a pet. It is the owners responsibilty, As far as the guy goes he was just being an arse.

Greensneeze · 05/05/2009 17:54

did I mention the bloody thing only had three legs to begin with?

talk about "a leg to stand on"

Morloth · 05/05/2009 17:57

I love Judge Judy, she gets paid to yell at stupid people all day. Can't think of a better job.

Hell I would do it for free.

Paolosgirl · 05/05/2009 18:26

Me too - I heart JJ. She's the kind of straight talking, no nonsense woman I'd love to be. And the stupid people who bleat in front of her have to do what she says! My perfect job.

chequersmate · 05/05/2009 18:35

Not read whole thread so apols if repeating but are we actually sure the cat is dead?

They could be pulling a total fast one.

TeaOneSugar · 05/05/2009 18:40

I certainly wouldn't pay anything if I'd been verbally abused. He was clearly trying it on, thinking he could bully you into paying.

I don't think you have a legal or moral obligation to pay in these circumstances.

wotulookinat · 05/05/2009 18:48

Hmmmm difficult situation. It is a risk you run by owning a cat - and vets bills are part of pet ownership. It would be a nice gesture to offer something towards the bills though.
BUT - if I were you I would not pay after getting mouthful late at night.
However, you did say you would pay for the vets bills at the time.
Like I said, tricky situation. I feel sorry for her having lost a pet, but if I were you I wouldn't pay.

self · 05/05/2009 19:03

sue them, i have a mad dog and i live in fear of being sued.

PurlyQueen · 05/05/2009 19:21

This man is trying it on.

We had one of our cats put down a couple of months ago. No way did it cost £200. I don't think it cost more than £50 and that included a 'last meal' of Whiskas.