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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be offended that a one-night stand only wanted a one-night stand?

109 replies

didIreally · 13/04/2009 12:05

Ok- Im pretty sure I am but please hear me out.

Met a really nice bloke on Friday night and ended up going home with him and having sex! (Totally out of character but had a great time!) First man I've slept with since I split up with exH a year ago.

I was happy for it just to be a one-night thing as I am really enjoying being on my own but feel offended that he hasn't called or even text me.

It's really knocked my confidence. What is wrong with me? Did he not find me attractive?
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, I know I'm being ridiculous but would have been nice if he'd have wanted to see me again. (although I probably wouldn't want to meet up with him again!)

OP posts:
BitOfFun · 14/04/2009 16:17

Oh MorrisZapp, I totally disagree there- every single serious relationship I've had has started with first night sex...>

Expat - Maurice the lizard?! I think I might have had him

TrinityIsGettingABabyRhino · 14/04/2009 16:17

not so true about the shagging the guy on the first night...

e have been married for 9 years, have three dds and a puppy

expatinscotland · 14/04/2009 16:18

Date? Who said anything about a date? Do free drinks and a kebab on the way home count as a date?

BitOfFun · 14/04/2009 16:19

Drop your drawers, Nancy? You mean you actually wear knickers for a date? [slaggy emoticon]

stoppinattwo · 14/04/2009 16:20

oh my eyes...the tears are rolling....pardon the pun Nancy66

MorrisZapp - I think (on the whole) you're right. By Nancy66 on Tue 14-Apr-09 16:16:19

MorrisZapp · 14/04/2009 16:21

I can't be making this up - and millions of women who had sex the first night and never got called back can't be wrong??

I didn't say it's a concrete rule, but in my experience and that of every woman I've met in my life it is a pretty good general one.

expatinscotland · 14/04/2009 16:21

Oh, Bit, he had Maurice's aquarium, complete with heat lamp, in his kitchen! Admittedly it was quite a large kitchen, even by American standards, but I woke up in the early hours of the morning desperate for a glass of water.

I didn't want to wake my sleeping, erm, partner de la nuit and when I saw this strange light emanating, I followed it.

Hence, how I met Maurice.

We had a little chat whilst I drank some water.

expatinscotland · 14/04/2009 16:21

Oh, Bit, he had Maurice's aquarium, complete with heat lamp, in his kitchen! Admittedly it was quite a large kitchen, even by American standards, but I woke up in the early hours of the morning desperate for a glass of water.

I didn't want to wake my sleeping, erm, partner de la nuit and when I saw this strange light emanating, I followed it.

Hence, how I met Maurice.

We had a little chat whilst I drank some water.

lou33 · 14/04/2009 16:23

i did it with exh the first day and were together 17.5 yrs, dont know why i didnt leave it as a one night stand tbh

similarly i did with exbf and we were together for 9m til he emigrated 2 yrs ago (he is back again and i saw him for the first time yesterday, was like old times )

SerendipitousHarlot · 14/04/2009 16:36

I think a lot of people here really need to raise their standards

Just because your standards are different, doesn't mean that other people need to change theirs.

noddyholder · 14/04/2009 16:45

lou is the guy who went to thailand back?OMG what are you going to do?can you tell I don't get out much

YanknCock · 14/04/2009 17:02

Married to my one night stand.

But had plenty of one night stands that did not end in marriage, or even a phone call. I reckon LTRs only come out of one night stands if you're completely not expecting it.

MorrisZapp · 14/04/2009 17:05

Exactly. I'm happily loved up with my one night stand too, but there were countless before him that I wanted to ring me back and who didn't.

Lots of them didn't ring. One of them did.

The one doesn't negate the lots.

BitOfFun · 14/04/2009 17:08

Oh, I only remember the happy endings

BitOfFun · 14/04/2009 17:20

Oh and Expat, I was only joking about Maurice, thankfully! < shudder >

I did have a memorable encounter with a rat early one morning though- my shriek must have woken the whole tenement I was marginally mollified to discover it was the guy's pet, but he wasn't impressed that I had been hurling heavy objects at it from the bed. Good job it was faster than me

Original poster
didIreally · 14/04/2009 17:30

Wow, I feel loads better after hearing all about everyone conquests/disasters/successes!
I was realistic when I slept with him, was just going to be a one night thing etc.
Feeling loads better about things today- live and learn!!!! Must be more careful with my bag!?!
Thanks all for sharing.

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 14/04/2009 17:36

We've all been there, didI. And some of us just kept going back .

lou33 · 14/04/2009 17:37

(apologies for hijack)

noddy yes! we spent the day together yesterday, he is coming back at the weekend

YanknCock · 14/04/2009 17:38

Would much rather have seen a pet rat than a handgun right by the guy's bed! (This was in the U.S., so possibly legal, but still disconcerting).

Especially scary when he said the next morning that he'd been trying to drink himself to death before I started chatting to him in the bar.

Yank's brain said: 'run run run run run run run run!!!!'

BitOfFun · 14/04/2009 17:44

Oh a bit of Cock beats a Yank in that situation...I bet you're glad you went British

BitOfFun · 14/04/2009 17:49

Oh a bit of Cock beats a Yank in that situation...I bet you're glad you went British

YanknCock · 14/04/2009 18:30
expatinscotland · 14/04/2009 18:37

oh, yes, or his friggin' samuri sword collection hanging all over the walls in his living room.

'I'm a ninja'.

No, you're a fucking nutcase.

BYE! Thanks for the memories. Not.

expatinscotland · 14/04/2009 18:39

Or:

Knock, knock.

'Oh shit, I forgot! That's my mom!'

Great. Well, it's about time she learned, her son's a slut.

expatinscotland · 14/04/2009 18:41

Ring, ring (for the 10th time that morning and my head's splitting with hangover).

'Your phone keeps ringing, aren't you going to pick it up?'

'Nah. It's just my ex-boyfriend again.'

Your.ex.boyfriend.

M-kay.

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