To be annoyed that the teacher snapped at my DS

[Fairynufff]

DS loves ICT and has been partnered with a child who has aspergers. They have to share because there aren't enough computers. The child is obsessive about the equipment and my DS is basically allowed to type for him and then he gets upset if my son so much as clicks his finger on the mouse. My son (who is regarded as kind and patient) gets so frustrated because they never finish the tasks and the aspergers boy doesn't want my son's help or to listen to him.

Last week my son basically gave up. Sighed and turned to the side. The teacher told him off for "not helping" the other boy.

AIBU to be annoyed at the teacher?

Fairynuff, agree with everyone else that you need to talk to the teacher. It is HER responsibility to support the child with special needs whatever they are, not your son's. It's fine to expect children to be kind to each other, but this particular situation is a problem that needs to be resolved by the adults, who have the emotional maturity, training and resources to deal with it. Not an eight year old boy.

And it's particularly unfortunate that the lesson your ds is learning is not 'isn't it nice to help each other' but 'avoid X, it's too difficult to work with him'. That's the teacher's fault.

The individual teacher's responsibility is to the whole class and the school's responsibility is to make sure that the teacher is supported to be able to do this. If she does not have the necessary resources then she can't teach the whole class effectively, including the child with aspergers. If the resources in the school are poor it is unfair to blame an individual teacher for this. The context is that there are 30 kids and one teacher - that person is only human!

It is her responsibility, however to make sure that the OP's son is not frustrated/disadvantaged and has the opportunity to learn and enjoy the lesson. If she has not noticed his frustration, or chosen to ignore it then it needs to be put right.

The resources available to her are merely being speculated about here - she needs to talk to the SENCO at her school to see what can be made available. I found that our SENCO was understanding about the particular difficulties with respect to ICT and Aspergers.