to think PIL were mean with DD's birthday present?

[Moop]

I am interested in what people think about presents for their children from family and especially whether grandparents should be fair between their grandchildren.

We have just had DD first birthday and to be fair to my PIL they did a small birthday party for her at our request and MIL made a cake and did sandiches etc and it was very nice.

The bought her a £10 toy (happened to see it in the shop the other day) nothing else. I feel that they have been/are more generous with their other grandchildren and given they have lots of money I feel that there is a little that we can afford things for our daughter hence they won't spend their money on her and I feel a little hurt that they buy such cheap stuff. I am always hearing how hard up their daughter is (husband is a real joke and they have satelitte tv and designer haircuts and things so not that hard up).

I think that grandparents should be fair between their grandchildren and not assess how much income each of us has (none of their 3 children are badly off and it would be different if one couple was really struggling).

I guess the other thing that annoys me is that they don't ask me if their is anything we would like for her - anything we would find useful - it seems that xmas and birthday so far have been the easiest, cheapest plastic thing from the supermarket.

my mil brought my sil (her daughter the pram for her first child. when we had twins some 9 years earlier we got nothing just a modest gift at their birth. I mentioned this to my dh at the time and he said she must have got us something, but I am very clear on this that she did not. It didn't bother me but it does show favourtism which i am opposed to,My ex mil brought my oldest very modest gifts when he was small, but is extremely generous now he is older, infact my other 2 (who aren't her grandchildren) get treated the same, It is not so much how much is spent it is the comparisons you make.if it really bothers you get your dh to have aword, but it may be worth just seeing what happens as your dd gets older

YABU
in my experience, you tend to get what you deserve

moop does your dd seem to enjoy the present?

if yes, then does it matter how much it cost?

I know they should treat all their grandchildren the same, are the others older and appreciate presents properly (a 1 year old cant really), do they have parties for the others?

Think you are being a bit unreasonable, there are much much worse things outlaws can do than by a cheap birthday present